To be irked by friends 'confidence'?

[stuffedcookie]

One of my close friends is a really lovely person and has a lot of excellent qualities. She's also the vainest person I know and I don't know whether to be annoyed by it or to admire her belief in herself!

For example. She is constantly taking selfies. Whatever we are doing. We went out for a meal and drinks and I took pictures of both of us. When I take pictures she says 'oh my god I look stunning, can you send me them please'. When she takes pictures its just of her. She posts a lot on social media with captions like 'I know, I'm gorgeous'. On this evening out, I went to the bathroom and on my return she asked me how the lighting was, so she could go and do a photo shoot in the toilets.

Am I just bitter that I don't feel quite that confident in my looks or is she OTT?

Good for her!

@bindud

She posts a lot on social media with captions like 'I know, I'm gorgeous'.

I would assume that was sarcasm 😆

Yeh, I wondered if she is taking the piss out of herself? The fact that she doesn't try to drag others down is a positive.

She sounds hopelessly insecure about her looks; that's why she's constantly begging for other peoples' attention and praise.

Be extra kind to the poor thing. " Oh sweetie, don't worry about that teensy spot/wrinkle/chin hair; I bet nobody on social media will even notice."

I wish more women thought they were gorgeous .. I’m all for more selfies, less filters, and more overt confidence. If you think you look great - then good on you … get it out there. About time we saw women of all ages, shapes and sizes, posting pictures of themselves !

I’m 50, 5’ 3” and a size 24 - I get friends to send me pictures if I think I look good - and I’ll post them on Instagram of wherever, and I’ll say “looking good” - because I do look good.

If you aren’t your own biggest cheerleader then who the fuck is going to be ??? I also celebrate my friends successes whatever they may be - and full encourage self confidence.

Get taking pictures …

@2bazookas

She sounds hopelessly insecure about her looks; that's why she's constantly begging for other peoples' attention and praise.

Be extra kind to the poor thing. " Oh sweetie, don't worry about that teensy spot/wrinkle/chin hair; I bet nobody on social media will even notice."

DON'T do that.

Good for her!

@ExtraOnion

I wish more women thought they were gorgeous .. I’m all for more selfies, less filters, and more overt confidence. If you think you look great - then good on you … get it out there. About time we saw women of all ages, shapes and sizes, posting pictures of themselves !

I’m 50, 5’ 3” and a size 24 - I get friends to send me pictures if I think I look good - and I’ll post them on Instagram of wherever, and I’ll say “looking good” - because I do look good.

If you aren’t your own biggest cheerleader then who the fuck is going to be ??? I also celebrate my friends successes whatever they may be - and full encourage self confidence.

Get taking pictures …

I didn't think to add this and actually I think its quite important- she doesn't use filters. So she's happy to upload photos just 'as she is' and it's a positive.

And whoever posted it, I don't think trying to make someone insecure about their looks is a particularly kind thing to do.

@2bazookas

She sounds hopelessly insecure about her looks; that's why she's constantly begging for other peoples' attention and praise.

Be extra kind to the poor thing. " Oh sweetie, don't worry about that teensy spot/wrinkle/chin hair; I bet nobody on social media will even notice."

Why would you do this if you think someone is insecure? You'd be nasty to them in an attempt to make them feel shit about themselves? Wow.

I think she sounds fabulous and good for her embracing herself as she is

@2bazookas

She sounds hopelessly insecure about her looks; that's why she's constantly begging for other peoples' attention and praise.

Be extra kind to the poor thing. " Oh sweetie, don't worry about that teensy spot/wrinkle/chin hair; I bet nobody on social media will even notice."

Why would you do this to anyone? But especially, why would you do that to someone you think is insecure?!

If she was my friend I think I'd just say 'yes you are gorgeous but can we put that to one side for the evening, because you're also a lot of fun and we can have great conversations about other things. Faffing about with photos takes time away from enjoying the night, so let's do a few now for your SM, and get it out of the way'

If you aren’t your own biggest cheerleader then who the fuck is going to be ???

Amen!

I had a friend like this. I used to sing "you're so vain" to her all the time. It can be annoying, but not the worst possible quality in a mate (unless they're also running you down).

Most women I know hate how they look or are at least not happy with it (myself included), so I actually find her attitude quite refreshing. I have literally never met anyone in my life who behaves like that, and I wonder what has made her have such high self esteem because I wouldn't mind a bit of it myself!

As long as she's not putting other people down or constantly seeking validation online or whatever, then I don't seem the harm. She seems batshit but maybe that's just because we (women) have all been conditioned not to like ourselves or feel pride in our looks at all for fear of seeming 'vain'.

*my friend was always fussing over her hair and face in mirrors (or any sort of reflective surface) though, that was the annoying part, she was constantly striving to look perfect. Eg it was a pain in the ass when our bus would be coming up the road, and she'd still be a quarter of a mile back, peering into a vans wing mirror and fussing with her hair, totally oblivious.

If you aren’t your own biggest cheerleader then who the fuck is going to be ???

No one is & you should be. Again, that's not my interpretation of what's happening.

I have a friend who will text me before we go out saying, "get really dressed up, I want to take pics". I hate it. With a passion.

I had a friend for a while I met while travelling who was like this. We'd be sitting chatting in a beach bar and she'd get out HER IPAD and start taking pouty selfies of herself while we were in the middle of a conversation. Batshit. I let that friendship fizzle out!

Confidence is to be admired, self absorption and vanity is not.

@Ridiculeisnothingtobescaredof

I don't know anybody at all who boasts like she does, never heard anyone say that. I don't think she's as confident as she comes across, I think she's actually insecure and is just faking it.

This. And saying that a guys girlfriend isn't a patch on her? God she sounds horrible. No wonder she's single..

A photoshoot in a bathroom too? How classy.. Don't think Kate moss's career started off like that

A photoshoot in a bathroom too? How classy.. Don't think Kate moss's career started off like that

I suspect Ms. Moss spent a lot of time in bathrooms at the height of her career...

Wasn't there a character like that in Friends - the blonde lady, can't remember her name

OMG! Yes! Played by Stifler’s Mom! With the fake British accent.

“I’ve never had any professional daahhhnce training”

@Poetrypatty

Wasn't there a character like that in Friends - the blonde lady, can't remember her name

Smell me! It's not perfume, it's my natural scent!

“Mmmmm……..musty”