Things that mostly only happen on mumsnet

[Imyourvenus]

Heres mine;

You must love MIL even if she is a bitch toad from hell

You must never say anything negative about anyone on benefits

Admitting to having no friends

Every 3rd person is NC with their family

Having a nanny

I’m sure I have more

Washing towels after every use (which I find pretty shocking from an environmental POV, not to mention the work involved).

It’s not enough to dislike the smell, look and sensation of vomit, you must have emetophobia. Bonus points if you put diagnosed in brackets after it.

(I’ve been a doctor (psychiatrist) for 20 years and neither I nor and other doctor I know have ever diagnosed someone with emetophobia, yet seemingly there are lots of diagnosed emetophobes out there)

@BalloonSlayer

Everyone's 14 year old son is "nearly 6 foot tall." No he's just taller than you, love.

🤣🤣

You must not, under any circumstances, admit to reading the Daily Mail 🤣

I'm sure this has been said (sorry too many pages to read right now)
But rather than actually speak to anyone, notes are the best way to communicate with anyone pissing you off.

@WeWashEverythingExceptLaundry

Washing towels after every use (which I find pretty shocking from an environmental POV, not to mention the work involved).

Oh yes! This one.

A 40 year old posted this week about finances and mentioned having a £150k pension. At least one person questioned why the pension was 'so low'. OP explained that until a couple of years ago they'd 'only been on £55k' a year. Fucking dreamworld here sometimes.

If your parent/grandparent/relative over 55 is having an off day/says something strange/doesn't put up with someone's shit/decides to stop being a walk over people pleaser - it must be dementia.

@interferingma

It is crucial that your unborn baby has a nickname assigned at birth. It is at least as important as their actual name

Yeah - I never understood that! What am I missing?

Washing towels after every use

At 90 degrees. Because bacteria

That if you give your child a name within the top 20 they will be one of five with that name in their class.

All apart from a select few names are either too frilly or chavvy.

Everyone has the finances to move to a better area at the drop of a hat. Even if they can't afford it they still must move somewhere more expensive.

Husbands are useless and lazy and the ILs are toxic.

Focusing on minor details that don't matter and so completely derails the thread (E.G. the one about the missing clothes where everyone was concerned about the amount of rent someone was paying).

Refuses to give cash/ money as a wedding gift (considered vulgar)

Refuses to give cash/ money as a wedding gift (considered vulgar)

Yes, but also seemingly hating/resenting anyone who's wedding you get invited to.

En-suites are disgusting.

I have never ever come across this view anywhere in my life expect on here 😂

*except

@minionsrule

I'm sure this has been said (sorry too many pages to read right now) But rather than actually speak to anyone, notes are the best way to communicate with anyone pissing you off.

...and always, always communicate by text, because face to face or actually speaking on the phone would only lead to clear and pleasant communication with few misunderstandings. And then you'd have nothing and no-one to complain about and no reason to go NC with your MIL/best friend/SIL

@careerchangemaybe

En-suites are disgusting.

I have never ever come across this view anywhere in my life expect on here 😂

Pooing in them is what’s disgusting. Their husbands are ordered not to and apparently comply.

Also - thinking en suite means bathroom.

Everyone has anxiety (non diagnosed)

Having a salary over 40k is deemed offensive. (MN is nowhere near as middle class as everyone pretends)

I also once read that toilets don't belong in bathrooms

Equally you must have multiple toilets in your house and your DH is only allowed to poo in the one at the bottom of the garden

@Aaaabbbcccc

Everyone has anxiety (non diagnosed)

And social anxiety. And label themselves ‘introverts’ as though it was a medical condition.

Posters have always just been through a period of “horrendous mental health”.

To me that would indicate hospitalisation for a manic or psychotic episode, a schizophrenia diagnosis etc. But it generally seems to mean stress at work and a prang with MIL.

@HallieParkerJames

I also once read that toilets don't belong in bathrooms

Equally you must have multiple toilets in your house and your DH is only allowed to poo in the one at the bottom of the garden

Yes. 🤣