Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask what we'd put down as our marital status?

254 replies

Elsalvador · 27/01/2022 11:49

With DH for 20 years. Not married and I don't want to turn this a debate about whether we should be or not :)

Looking for life insurance quotes, and the marital status is either married, single, divorced, separated, widowed or civil partnership. None of these fit. What would you put? I don't know whether this affects the premium displayed. Does anyone know? Thanks so much in advance Smile

OP posts:
cakeambush · 27/01/2022 12:04

Single. And he's not your 'DH'

SilentNoMore · 27/01/2022 12:05

Agree with pp saying get single policy but it will be more expensive as you are single (especially for your not h)

SantaHat · 27/01/2022 12:05

It’s a legal status, not your availability for dating.
Your single. It’s not a big deal or complex question.

girlmom21 · 27/01/2022 12:05

@DGRossetti

How did you get 20 years into this before needing to ask ?
Lots of places offer 'cohabiting' as an option
Viviennemary · 27/01/2022 12:05

Single would be the only option here.

PattyPan · 27/01/2022 12:06

Sometimes they have an option for living with partner or common law but in the absence of anything like that, single. Just read single as unmarried rather than alone.

Billandben444 · 27/01/2022 12:06

I've been with my partner 22 years and we would both put divorced (because we are).

girlmom21 · 27/01/2022 12:07

@QuestionsorComments

Hmm. I told my insurance company DH died, but I haven't specifically changed my marital status to widow. Would they really use that to avoid paying?
Did you specifically tell them not to change it? If not, you could justifiably argue that you notified them.

Well you couldn't by the time they come to pay out, obviously, but theoretically the claimant could.

OldFirstTimeMum · 27/01/2022 12:07

Legally you’re still single.

LovelyLovelyWarmCoffee · 27/01/2022 12:08

I’m assuming you wrote DH on purpose to give a snarky answer to people who will point out he is not your DH but your DP…

Stookeen · 27/01/2022 12:08

As everyone else said, if there's no option for 'cohabiting', single is what fits.

VikingOnTheFridge · 27/01/2022 12:08

@PattyPan

Sometimes they have an option for living with partner or common law but in the absence of anything like that, single. Just read single as unmarried rather than alone.
Fucking hell I hope you don't mean any company operating in England here. 'Common law' has a lot to answer for...
OldFirstTimeMum · 27/01/2022 12:09

Married people statistically live longer than single people so this will possibly affect your premium as they very much go on statistics for these things. But you can’t lie as that would make the policy null and void and you legally are single.
I know in affect it’s as though you are married, but when it comes to policies the letter of the law is important.

BarbaraofSeville · 27/01/2022 12:10

@QuestionsorComments

Hmm. I told my insurance company DH died, but I haven't specifically changed my marital status to widow. Would they really use that to avoid paying?
What is the difference (legally) between being a widow and being single?

I wondered this when I helped MIL do an online comparison for her car insurance not long after PIL had passed away. I just picked the 'widow' box as that seemed appropriate at the time but what about, for example if someone was widowed very young and didn't enter another relationship for sometime if at all?

Would a 60 YO who had been widowed in her 20s and not remarried be expected to declare herself as a widow many decades later? Or what if she was widowed, then remarried, then divorced?

You don't usually see separated/divorced as an option so single would seem appropriate as her widowed status is 'cancelled out' by her remarriage (apologies if this sounds insensitive).

KellyABC · 27/01/2022 12:11

It really winds me up that I have to put divorced when my marriage lasted 2 years but I've been with my current partner for ten.

PattyPan · 27/01/2022 12:12

@VikingOnTheFridge yep, it was money supermarket I think. It’s also what I have down on my details with my employer (in England and a lot of lawyers work here!). I know it’s not an actual thing but I guess for my employer it means eg if there’s an emergency they know it’s my partner who they’re calling.

girlmom21 · 27/01/2022 12:12

@OldFirstTimeMum

Married people statistically live longer than single people so this will possibly affect your premium as they very much go on statistics for these things. But you can’t lie as that would make the policy null and void and you legally are single. I know in affect it’s as though you are married, but when it comes to policies the letter of the law is important.
The statistics on this would be interesting because surely once one half of the couple dies (whilst married) the surviving spouse becomes single and therefore single people live longer?
girlmom21 · 27/01/2022 12:13

@KellyABC

It really winds me up that I have to put divorced when my marriage lasted 2 years but I've been with my current partner for ten.
Can't you put single?
HopefulProcrastinator · 27/01/2022 12:15

The statistics on this would be interesting because surely once one half of the couple dies (whilst married) the surviving spouse becomes single and therefore single people live longer?

No, the surviving spouse becomes a widow so enters that statistical field instead of the single one.

girlmom21 · 27/01/2022 12:17

@HopefulProcrastinator

The statistics on this would be interesting because surely once one half of the couple dies (whilst married) the surviving spouse becomes single and therefore single people live longer?

No, the surviving spouse becomes a widow so enters that statistical field instead of the single one.

That makes sense. If the widow then remarried would they still be reported as a widow or a spouse?

Don't worry if you don't know - it's just not something I've ever considered and don't know how accurate the reporting can be!

Dixiechickonhols · 27/01/2022 12:17

It’s a legal status question so you are single.
Out of curiosity can I ask why you don’t want to be legal partners (civil partnership).
I see people getting upset that officially their long term cohabitation isn’t recognised legally but there is a easy way to do that now.

ReviewingTheSituation · 27/01/2022 12:18

But one of the descriptions provided does fit - legally. In the eyes of the law, you are single as you have undergone no legal process to defer from that.

It might not be an option you want to tick, but it is technically correct. You have no legal ties to another person, which is what they're asking here.

ReviewingTheSituation · 27/01/2022 12:19

The odd thing on the form is 'separated' as until you're divorced, you're still married. I'm not sure 'separated' is a legal thing, but more than prepared to be corrected on that!

CrushedPistachios · 27/01/2022 12:20

Single

donkeyhottie · 27/01/2022 12:21

I don't understand how you can be unsure about this tbh OP