Odd text message from partner

[OtherNameblahblah]

Hi all,

I've been on here for ages - name changed for this as I want it separate to my usual account.

My DP has gone away overnight for a course, he says he told me about it ages ago but I have no memory of this. We were chatting on WhatsApp and while he drives he uses a voice to text feature. We had a normal conversation up until I got a message that said the following;

'I'm waving at Stonehenge for you, it's very misty'

I asked what he meant, he said he meant he was waving at Stonehenge for me as it's cool and it's what people do. I said I'd never heard of this before, and asked if he meant to message someone else saying 'I'm waiting for you at Stonehenge...'

He's insisting that he meant he was waving 'for me' at Stonehenge, which sounds really weird to me. Is this a thing that I've just not heard of?

I'm a bit worried that he was trying to message someone else and sent it to me instead, and his voice to text changed 'waiting' to 'waving'.

Am I being paranoid? He's just changed the subject entirely after doubling down that he meant he was just driving past Stonehenge and that was quite cool. He's a great bloke and I have never had any reason to doubt him until this very moment. I just have a horrible feeling he's fibbing...

Can anyone reassure me that I'm just being a silly old bint??

We've been together on and off for almost 2 years.

I think you're being paranoid. I wouldn't think anything of this.
It seems highly unlikely he'd voice message you his entire journey but actually be going to meet someone else at Stonehenge.

My parents are in Devon I’m in Kent, when travelling to and from seeing each other we always do the git coffee from fleet. Just waving to Stonehenge, had a wee in lay by with Loos, it’s our mutual family way of keeping in touch and letting each other know we’re safe. Stonehenge is approx halfway between us so that’s another reason we do it.

@Magicandspiders

I think it's stranger to say you're waiting at stone hedge. Surely if he was meeting someone then it was prearranged so you'd just say: I'm here. YABU

And based on this typo alone is more likely his phone would misunderstand Stonehenge than 'waving' so if it got that right I'd say it's pretty accurate

I told my dc to wave at their grandparents as we drove past their junction on the motorway last week. It's totally normal in my head, but they did look at me like I'd lost my mind!

This is exactly the kind of thing I would say, I got it from my parents -- dad used to travel a lot and would often say things on the phone (in the days of car phones) like "I'm waving at the Tower of London" or whatever to mean he was passing an interesting landmark.

I dont think anybody sensible would be having a romantic liaison at Stonehenge in this cold weather. Stop worrying.

YABU to mither him while he is driving, leave him be and let him drive safely, maybe so he can concentrate better on cars braking in front of him?

It sound to me like he was doing this for you as you are not there.
So as you are not hear and can not see it I'm waving at Stonehenge for you.

Perfectly normal.

I wave at a particular friend as I go through a particular station, so I could easily have waved at Stonehenge for you. If I was waiting for someone I'd be specific - I'm by the loos/in the gift shop etc. It's too big a site not to.

The waving at Stonehenge I don't find strange.

The suddenly going on a work trip (that you have no recollection of) and staying at a "friends" house however would set alarm bells ringing for me.

I think you're spidey senses were already tingling OP and that's why you've picked up on the waving comment.

Stonehenge is a famous landmark, if I was chatting with someone and driving past I'd say something similar.

The level of overthinking here would suggest that perhaps there are bigger concerns about your relationship, I mean it's not as if Stonehenge is a well known meeting spot to conduct an affair

What @LIZS said was my immediate reaction

Nobody can say whether it's a typo, whether he's actually at Stonehenge, whether he's normally a waver at monuments, whether the course is real, whether he's having an affair.

Anything could be true. But you know him and we don't, and it's making you feel horrible. Why is that? In a healthy relationship, even if you suspected a typo, you'd just get back to him and say 'Waving? At a monument? Was that a typo?!' There was something unhealthy going on between you before this; this hasn't caused you not to trust him. It's a symptom of the fact that you already didn't trust him.

What's happened in the past to bring that feeling into the relationship?

When we go to see extended family we say things like 'just gave the Angel of the North a quick wave' so they know roughly where we are in a more interesting way rather than telling them which road sign we've just passed.

Ha she given you cause to not trust him before?

Talk to text might change the words, but not the order they appear in.

My vehicle has CarPlay and I dictate WhatsApp messages rather than call. It’s quicker.

@Valkyrie40

The waving at Stonehenge I don't find strange.

The suddenly going on a work trip (that you have no recollection of) and staying at a "friends" house however would set alarm bells ringing for me.

I think you're spidey senses were already tingling OP and that's why you've picked up on the waving comment.

This.

Why did he not arrange accommodation earlier? And why is he staying in London if the course is in Cambridge?

Better to wave at Stonehenge than scream at the Sistine Chapel.

I mean he's not LITERALLY waving at Stonehenge. It's just a figure of speech. Ffs 😂

Mine waves at sheep and cows on our hikes

I talk to dogs like they're babies.

I think you're being paranoid.

I was a bit like this with exdh. He was odd though.

In my life this would be short for:
"I'm just passing Stonehenge - it's really misty"
"Ooh how lovely - give it a wave from me!"
"Will do!"

Because he would anticipate that this is the sort of thing I would say.

Where in London is the friend??

Any ref to paying ULEZ charge and / or Congestion Charge? Or DART charge, because from Devon to Cambridge I would be most likely to go over the Dartford crossing (unless stopping in London itself)

Sounds fine to me. Who doesn't wave at Stonehenge?

His message is definitely one I would send. It's an 'I'm seeing this cool thing and holding you in mind' kind of a message. And I also would have changed the subject if I'd have received a response like yours!

@RuthTopp

If I was driving from Devon to London , it would be M5 to Bristol and M4 to London.

Depends on whether you fancy the scenic route.

Do you know his friend? Does he have a partner and are you friendly with her, if so?

My first thought is who hooks up at Stonehenge?! 😂

I think waving at Stonehenge makes more sense than meeting someone there!!
We always point it out driving past - such a landmark so I can see how someone would write that and it wouldn't ring alarm bells if my DP sent it. (I'd laugh and think what a weirdo!)

Did your partner wave at trains or planes as a kid or something similar - maybe it's a throw back to childhood?

The fact you are worried probably speaks more to an underlying lack of trust. So yeah there's problem one way or another.