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Original poster

Odd text message from partner

447 replies

OtherNameblahblah · 25/01/2022 16:11

Hi all,

I've been on here for ages - name changed for this as I want it separate to my usual account.

My DP has gone away overnight for a course, he says he told me about it ages ago but I have no memory of this. We were chatting on WhatsApp and while he drives he uses a voice to text feature. We had a normal conversation up until I got a message that said the following;

'I'm waving at Stonehenge for you, it's very misty'

I asked what he meant, he said he meant he was waving at Stonehenge for me as it's cool and it's what people do. I said I'd never heard of this before, and asked if he meant to message someone else saying 'I'm waiting for you at Stonehenge...'

He's insisting that he meant he was waving 'for me' at Stonehenge, which sounds really weird to me. Is this a thing that I've just not heard of?

I'm a bit worried that he was trying to message someone else and sent it to me instead, and his voice to text changed 'waiting' to 'waving'.

Am I being paranoid? He's just changed the subject entirely after doubling down that he meant he was just driving past Stonehenge and that was quite cool. He's a great bloke and I have never had any reason to doubt him until this very moment. I just have a horrible feeling he's fibbing...

Can anyone reassure me that I'm just being a silly old bint??

We've been together on and off for almost 2 years.

OP posts:
Chocolateis1ofyour5aday · 25/01/2022 17:57

I could see why he thought you would understand this if you'd both been past it before and he was reminding you of the journey, or he was telling you he's almost at his destination.
Otherwise Hmm

Everydaydayisaschoolday · 25/01/2022 17:58

It sounds like a reasonable voice to text error to me. The real problem her is that you have been together 2 years 'on and off' Why have you been off? And now you are suspicious of him. Those the worrying things here.

Alcemeg · 25/01/2022 17:59

You can read what you want into it, I'd love a message like that. If it builds on existing doubts, listen to them, otherwise wave them off.

firsttimemumhere · 25/01/2022 17:59

You can see it from the main road, there is no place to stop unless you go to the visitor centre (and it's ridiculously expensive) and the road is a dual carriageway in parts along the A303. I always wave at Stonehenge when I'm passing but I like to see it.

Echobelly · 25/01/2022 18:00

Glad you feel reassured OP - anxiety can carry us away sometimes but it really doesn't sound like there's any reason to think it wasn't just an affectionate message to you!

Sunsunny17 · 25/01/2022 18:02

He’s lying. I’m guessing too many holes in story. Be careful. Ask for photos, eta and other off mark questions

Laila747 · 25/01/2022 18:02

I wave at football stadiums for DS 🤷‍♀️

I thought everyone did….

me4real · 25/01/2022 18:06

Wouldn't he have stopped and taken a photo instead?

@HollowTalk Not if you're on the motorway obvs.

@OtherNameblahblah I believe him but I can see why it sounds suspicious.

grapewine · 25/01/2022 18:08

@Sunsunny17

He’s lying. I’m guessing too many holes in story. Be careful. Ask for photos, eta and other off mark questions
I mean, yeah. If you want to end the relationship. I wouldn't stand for this level of paranoia in a partner.
Original poster
OtherNameblahblah · 25/01/2022 18:08

Just to clarify I didn't accuse him of anything or mither him with paranoid messages - and I'm so glad I posted here instead of probing too far into it with him. He's messaged me, arrived at his friend's house and sent me a picture of himself with his friend's little toddler.

So there we are - no mystery Stonehenge woman! Just a silly bint after all :D

Thanks again!!

OP posts:
Wilkolampshade · 25/01/2022 18:10

Glad you're reassured OP.
It's also (I think) a sign he was thinking of you while he was away. I know most couples would expect that, but my DH really doesn't, which makes me a bit sad.....

TheVanguardSix · 25/01/2022 18:10

Your latest update gives the whole scenario so much more context.
Yeah, so you're really just a silly ol' bint. Grin You can bin your gut on this one, OP.
Hugs and Flowers... anxiety's a bitch, isn't it?

Bigfathairyones · 25/01/2022 18:11

Yup, I'd wave at it too and then tell my dh. x

zaffa · 25/01/2022 18:13

Just to reiterate OP - I live near Stonehenge so drive past a lot and there really isn't anywhere to wait. It's a single carriage way that is constantly blocked by traffic and frankly if anyone tried to stop to meet someone there would be outrage 😂.
Also, it's quite expensive to get in and if you were to wait there to meet someone you would need to be much more specific or you would absolutely not find each other. It would be more plausible to say I am waiting at the entrance or such like.
I understand your anxiety, I have experienced similar and it's not fun. I hope you feel better soon

steff13 · 25/01/2022 18:13

@Eloise12

Trust your gut.
Sometimes your gut just justifies your paranoid/controlling feelings and isn't to be trusted.

I haven't read the full thread, but it's not different than saying that he told someone "hello" for you. I don't know if it's "a thing" to wave at Stonehenge, but what he said and how he worded it isn't suspicious.

TheVolturi · 25/01/2022 18:13

@Sunsunny17

He’s lying. I’m guessing too many holes in story. Be careful. Ask for photos, eta and other off mark questions
Some people 🙄
MommaDuck · 25/01/2022 18:13

Could he have meant waiting at Stonehenge services. When I do long distance and have met people (we go away a lot) I would just name the service station as a meeting point but not the whole thing. For instance we often meet near Rownham services - Southampton. Where I would say ‘I’ll wait at Rownham’s for you’

I actually cannot believe how many people think this is normal behaviour to wave at a monument as you drive past (as an adult and on your own) and then tell your partner m you ‘waved for them’.

First red flag was, him gaslighting sharing he told her he was going away. How likely is it you’d have forgotten this?
I think suspicious and I always go with to gut. My woman’s intuition is always right for me.

gobbynorthernbird · 25/01/2022 18:14

@OtherNameblahblah

Just to clarify I didn't accuse him of anything or mither him with paranoid messages - and I'm so glad I posted here instead of probing too far into it with him. He's messaged me, arrived at his friend's house and sent me a picture of himself with his friend's little toddler.

So there we are - no mystery Stonehenge woman! Just a silly bint after all :D

Thanks again!!

Don't say that, OP. You'll have posters accusing him of going to see his secret DC (having picked them up from Stonehenge, obvs).
Realmayowitheggs · 25/01/2022 18:14

I wave at loads when I am in the car. Totally normal thing for me.

I’ll often tell someone I’ll wave at something when driving past. Particularly if it means something to them. Don’t get me started on saying hello to the same things as I do that too.

Hallowbat · 25/01/2022 18:15

I find it more bizarre that people actually wave at places but I’d think it was supposed to be waiting too

TillyTopper · 25/01/2022 18:16

It's impossible to say I think, you can only go with your gut. I can imagine my DP saying "I've made it to Stonehenge, I've given it your love" or some such silly thing. From what you've written though you seem to be really suspicious of him and what he's doing which is a major red flag.

TheVolturi · 25/01/2022 18:16

@MommaDuck

Could he have meant waiting at Stonehenge services. When I do long distance and have met people (we go away a lot) I would just name the service station as a meeting point but not the whole thing. For instance we often meet near Rownham services - Southampton. Where I would say ‘I’ll wait at Rownham’s for you’

I actually cannot believe how many people think this is normal behaviour to wave at a monument as you drive past (as an adult and on your own) and then tell your partner m you ‘waved for them’.

First red flag was, him gaslighting sharing he told her he was going away. How likely is it you’d have forgotten this?
I think suspicious and I always go with to gut. My woman’s intuition is always right for me.

Does daddaduck sleep with one eye open? I would!
JenniferAllisonPhillipaSue · 25/01/2022 18:17

Having just read the thread, I now realise that I come from a really weird family. We always wave at inanimate objects, statues, buildings as we pass them - and then tell each other.

Hugasauras · 25/01/2022 18:20

When people say 'I waved at X' for you, it doesn't mean they physically actually waver (although some do!). It's just an expression to mean you've gone to somewhere interesting/familiar. Quite surprised so many people are unaware of it!

SoLongDarla · 25/01/2022 18:22

Well he's clearly still chatting to you. So if he was waiting for someone, either he's ignoring them to chat to you, or they're very late!!!

He meant he's waving for you. You said youve never seen it, and most people when they drive past it are like oh wow look there it is! so he's just basically done that for you.

Relax.