‘A walk’ for a first date - yes or no?

[Anon778833]

AIBU to think it’s lazy? In a way, I can see how walking around with someone can be a good way to get to know what they’re like but for a first date?

I’m trying to sift out the ones to avoid. Which I am never good at.

Yeah, I wouldn’t be impressed. Zero effort.

No thanks. In this cold if you are in the UK.

@Lunificent

It has some advantages but I’d be wondering if he was a cheapskate.

What is it with women whose go-to "scoping" of a man is about how much money he has/spends on them.

It makes me wonder if it's she who's the cheapskate, not him ...

@DoodleBelle

I wouldn’t like a walk as a first date. It screams I don’t want to spend any money on you.

I am glad I am not the only one thinking this lol.

Second date onwards maybe, but not the first.

I don't find the idea of a walk 'insulting'. But it puts you in a position of not really knowing what to wear. I usually make an effort with my appearance on dates. I actually really enjoy walks but as another person said, in the winter my nose will run which isn't very attractive is it? I suppose walks have become more mainstream due to covid. But to me it just seems ...odd.

@AngelinaFibres all dates that drag on are awful, walking or otherwise, if you walk somewhere you have to walk back to the car or tube or whatever, so you can't cut it short, but you can cut a coffee shop date pretty short (I would do an hour and then run for it).

I went on a date where we trudged along the seafront and it just highlighted how romantic this could have been if only we fancied each other!

No more walks for me (unless after a coffee or lunch/early supper date).

@ChangeMustCome

I always ask to go for a dog walk on a first date. My dog is a much better judge of character than me 😉

Always seems sort of romantic but eventually one of you will have a bag of dog shit in their hand and possibly no bin for a long time. I had dogs, I love dogs 🐕 but that bit would put me off on a first date.

[quote OnwardsAndSideways1]@AngelinaFibres all dates that drag on are awful, walking or otherwise, if you walk somewhere you have to walk back to the car or tube or whatever, so you can't cut it short, but you can cut a coffee shop date pretty short (I would do an hour and then run for it).

I went on a date where we trudged along the seafront and it just highlighted how romantic this could have been if only we fancied each other!

No more walks for me (unless after a coffee or lunch/early supper date).[/quote]
This is exactly my view - even the shortest walk is longer than a quick coffee.

Also, the OP has not mentioned money anywhere - so I don't know why people are thinking that is the issue

[quote OnwardsAndSideways1]@AngelinaFibres all dates that drag on are awful, walking or otherwise, if you walk somewhere you have to walk back to the car or tube or whatever, so you can't cut it short, but you can cut a coffee shop date pretty short (I would do an hour and then run for it).

I went on a date where we trudged along the seafront and it just highlighted how romantic this could have been if only we fancied each other!

No more walks for me (unless after a coffee or lunch/early supper date).[/quote]
Exactly my point

I once went on a walk as part of a first date and it was wonderful. Almost 12 years later and we’re married with 2 beautiful babies; it’s still one of my happiest memories together.

I did- he’s now my hubby

Old fashioned but nice on a fine day if you like walking, which I used to do. He will probably carry some light refreshments or, if he or you have researched the area, you'll stop at a cafe somewhere.

I used to love walking in the country. You really do get to know someone and share enjoyment of beautiful, sometimes remote, places and wild flowers.

Ideal first date for me is meeting for a drink of some sort. (And happy for both to pay their own way in case the weird 'you just want something for free' responses come in)

I love going for walks and do so regularly with DH and DS, but i don't know how well I'd get to know someone if I couldn't sit and face them. I think maybe a walk to a coffee place would be ideal?

(I'm a million years out of the game but I'm just talking hypothetically)

@Rainsunrainsun

Agree with those who say it’s a location dependent. Countryside no. Dull suburbs no. Living in London - yes! So many places for a lovely walk that then turn into endless possibilities for spontaneous add ons whatever the weather. Plus great vibes and so much to discover and see. Grab a take away coffee or a hot toddy Sit in a park Watch street music Pop into a free museum or gallery Ride the bus to a favourite pub Drinks by the river Dinner on top of skyscraper The opportunities are endless Really a walk in London can mean anything you want it to

But

OP did you suggest meeting for a drink and he turned that down and suggested a walk instead?

best first dates are walks. No outlay, safe - from covid and being able to be somewhere public and time to talk.

@Flyinggeese1234

OP did you suggest meeting for a drink and he turned that down and suggested a walk instead?

He didn't turn it down, he said yes ok. Then said, how about a walk?

Ideal as long as it's not lashing down. I wouldn't want a meal as a first date. Imagine meeting and knowing it's a firm no yet still having to sit through a meal. It is not fun.

@curmudgeonly007 no, I'm a long way from London unfortunately.

Ok, so a drink then a walk? Or was he suggesting a walk instead?

I ask because it’s equally fine for you to ask to do something else.

I think he was suggesting a walk instead.

My ex and I went on a walk for our first "date" he then never took me anywhere (not even for a coffee) for three years. He thought that I'd put up with it forever!! He was wrong

I live in London and I still wouldn’t do it

@DoodleBelle

I wouldn’t like a walk as a first date. It screams I don’t want to spend any money on you.

But, You could easily reverse this and say who is going want to date someone who is only interested in how money they are going on spend on them ?

Sounds pretty obvious, but couldn't you do a walk somewhere there's an opportunity for a coffee/drink first or after?

Perhaps he's not a drinker at all.

I'd probably ask a bit more about all this- have a phone call or a video date first, and discuss it there, much easier to arrange than on text and you get to see more of them beforehand (which will either make you keen or avoid the walk lol).