Would this offend you?

[FishGoBloop]

NC because this is outing

Say you went to a sibling's wedding where the bride had handmade all the favours and they were various little felt animals.

The bride gave you a cow, your OH a horse, and your

For goodness sake. Don't be ridiculous. Why would it offend you?
Felt animals okay for a 2yr old but a bit naff for adults.

@ConsiderablyRicherThanYow

You're not supposed to give women animals like cow, dog, pig, snake, rat etc. If I was making animals for people I'd give a woman something like a swan or a deer, maybe a rabbit. If I wanted the child to have a farmyard set to be entertained, I'd have put 3 farmyard animals for just the child. Then give the mum the prettiest animal I can possibly think of. Then give her husband a good one but not great, like badger or hedgehog. If you give him a lion it'd be too much. Yes it sounds mad, but it's the thing you have to think of to keep people (that are likely to get drunk and emotional later) happy.

However it was still very unreasonable of her to ruin your wedding day. She's not unreasonable to distance herself if she's offended.

Jesus Christ how do people live their lives if they have to put this much thought into how they interact with people and by extension how they interact with you Its patronising to suggest women need to have pretty delicate creatures else they'll cry and scream and tantrum. Are you not worried a rabbit might make her think you're calling her promiscuous?? Also patronising to not be able to give a man a lion lest they strutt around the dance hall all night trying to rut with any passing woman / his partner thinks you fancy him.

If you think the bride would go to that much effort to upset you, just don't go!

@lemmein FYI, if you'd brought it me we'd be bestest friends forever and ever!!

Whoever was offended needs to seek professional help IMO. Clearly they are not from a farming family.

I think it sounds lovely! I know my two children would have loved playing with them and it’s such a thoughtful little favour that’s also just a bit of fun for everyone!

Anyone who reads an insult into that is insanely insecure and off-the-scale paranoid.

Guest seriously overthought the felt animals, and was very rude.

@MaxNormal

Anyone who reads an insult into that is insanely insecure and off-the-scale paranoid.

I concur.

They must be exhausted analysing every little thing for offence.

off-the-scale paranoid
Grass will do that to you

Your wedding favours sound amazing, you are so thoughtful! There must be some back story with your relationship - my friends would understand but my ex sil would probably have reacted like yours!!

I think they sound adorable!

I would have loved to get one as a favour. And if it was a raccoon, even better!

Grass will do that to you

Your wedding favours sound wonderful OP, I am always delighted to receive something handmade.

I don’t know, I gave a very nice expensive gift to my partner’s DD in her birthday and I was sent a thank you card with a cow on it.

I assume young kids are not able to choose and pay for thank you cards so I understand her mum took the trouble to go and find a card for me, but as I am good at matching passive aggressiveness when I get it, I have replied to the gesture by sending very cheap gifts these days.

So yes, I can see a point at them not finding your collection of animal gifts inoffensive… and her wanting to distance herself from you.

I think she has overthought this and clearly overreacted. But I can see how she made the link to her incorrect assumption from you giving personalised animal gifts to other guests. She was probably looking at the cow wondering where the personalisation was in that and it's not that difficult to understand how she got offended.

Personally though, I would really love something like this and think it's a wonderful idea.

But now you've said that everyone else's favours had a special significance - a fish for the fish keeper, snails for the escargot lover, a replica of their pet dog - I'm not so sure that she doesn't have a point
This.

And I'm definitely in the camp of handmade felt animals is a strange favour. And immature.

I would have even loved a skunk, a spider or a frog they were cute!!

@stuntbubbles

Could you send her a follow-up gift to smooth things over? Several bats and a box of frogs.

I would laugh. Even if she was, it’s just a cheeky joke. My self esteem is not so low that I would leap to that conclusion and get offended in the first place though.

BTW have you seen how vicious swans can be???!

@TracyMosby

But now you've said that everyone else's favours had a special significance - a fish for the fish keeper, snails for the escargot lover, a replica of their pet dog - I'm not so sure that she doesn't have a point This.

And I'm definitely in the camp of handmade felt animals is a strange favour. And immature.

Why the need for the nastiness at the end?

Do you like making people feel shit?

If the kid liked farm animals, what was wrong with sending a lamb, a duck and a hen?

I think they got the message you wanted to convey especially if you chose a significative animal for each particular guest.

Why the need for the nastiness at the end? Do you like making people feel shit?
You mean like you just tried to do?

It is immature. And op said it herself. She thought the child would like them. Everyone else had personalised favours, the sister in law got a cow.

@Fatherliamdeliverance she's once of the daintiest persons I've ever met in my life. So if she thought I was calling her fat I would be really worried more than anything at why she would think that.

DH rolled his eyes and that's about all the attention he gave it.

Everyone's favour was personal to them, but you expected her to be able to divinate that her's wasn't personal to her.

Is that right?