‘Sorry the colour doesn’t suit my baby’

[Laughingstock91]

Sent a friend with a new baby some clothes - one thing was a really pale pink and the other thing was a really pale yellow. It was like a T-shirt and joggers set thing that I got in a small independent shop.

No Thankyou - just a comment that the colours weren’t right. The baby is 3 months old.

Aibu to think I would never have dreamed of making such a comment. I had some really unusual colours but I smiled, said Thankyou & the kids wore them as I was grateful to receive gifts.

I feel really offended- they weren’t cheap either 🤷🏻‍♀️

• Yes that's fair. I get the feeling OP would have been naffed off anyway tbh even if effusive thanks... But. OP? Incidentally again different people different ways. Different norms. Eg I always text next day thank you if friend cooks for me, or has some kind party. Say thanks for X, had great time/lush food. Was lovely to see you/ fab party etc. I do that stuff I don't know literally anyone who says thanks. Except my parents... So. That's where I got it from then! They don't do what I do. Because they're rude and whatever? Terrible people? I did wonder in 20s why no thanks. Then I thought. Well I know they're nice people who like me. Prob just not a thing they do. So I still say thanks and they don't and that's cool. And it goes both ways. They don't get the hump that I don't do cards. What's important? When it comes to friends, it's them, the relationship. If you know that care about you and vice versa. Changing view of them based on (in the scheme of things) trivial stuff. Feels missing the point to me.*

Are you an MP? Completely forgotten what the original question was.

Interesting that rather than actually responding to content of posts about my personal view of nature of friendship, point of present is to give something make recipient happy...

Rather. I'm-

Drunk
Found caps lock
Or an MP!!!

Anyone fancy saying yes would be vv grateful for the boobs babygro? Parents preferences when comes baby when comes baby clothes irrelevant?

Or. Why they prefer to have insincere thanks, and present given away/ back wardrobe. Than thanks soz can I exchange. So they get something they like?

And, if a friend. Who you like and likes you. Have good time with. Etc. Would change entire view of them based on a couple words?

Crap friends in first place surely. To think grabby rude awful person over something like this. When otherwise you close etc.

Don't get it. At all.

@Laughingstock91

Thing is- it wasn’t even a horrible set- the closest I can find is this pic from next which is similar

I want this in grown up size!!

@CheeseMmmm

Yes that's fair.

I get the feeling OP would have been naffed off anyway tbh even if effusive thanks... But.

OP?

Incidentally again different people different ways. Different norms.

Eg I always text next day thank you if friend cooks for me, or has some kind party. Say thanks for X, had great time/lush food. Was lovely to see you/ fab party etc.

I do that stuff I don't know literally anyone who says thanks.

Except my parents... So. That's where I got it from then!

They don't do what I do. Because they're rude and whatever? Terrible people?

I did wonder in 20s why no thanks. Then I thought. Well I know they're nice people who like me. Prob just not a thing they do.

So I still say thanks and they don't and that's cool.

And it goes both ways. They don't get the hump that I don't do cards.

What's important? When it comes to friends, it's them, the relationship. If you know that care about you and vice versa. Changing view of them based on (in the scheme of things) trivial stuff. Feels missing the point to me.

Someone's on the 🍷 tonight!

@CheeseMmmm I know you are genuine as have seen you post on other threads, but your posting style is unusual, hence the comments on here.

The issue for OP is the unnecessary abruptness and lack of manners from the gift recipient.

They certainly are.

My mil has knitted the most hideous cardigans in gooseberry green and apricot...with matching hats.
I said thanks very much and baby will wear them when she sees mil. She'll grow out of them quickly enough and I've pre-empted any more by buying some wool (saying I couldn't resist it and please may I have cardis next size up)
I think your friend is extremely rude and ungrateful.

Is there a full moon at the moment? There have been some extremely strange people mentioned on MN lately.

She's a rude brat OP, and yes, ask for them to be returned so you can either get a refund, or gift them in the future to a regular person.

As for this "friend" - she would be dropped forthwith if she were in my circle!

Lol, the baby is 3 months. They wear what is put on them, and who cares, as long as it's suitable for the weather.

Your friend does sound like she came across as ungrateful/ rude however I don’t dress my DD in certain colours because I don’t like them or they just don’t suit! Im not going to dress her in just anything to please other people! (My MIL bought Dd Who is only 5MO a black dress for Xmas, she is far too young to wear black!!!) depending on who bought the clothing I would either swap and tell them or keep in the back of the wardrobe!

It’s not what she’s said it’s more how she’s put it I think, I would much rather be told and asked for receipt than whatever I bought end up in the back of a wardrobe which is a massive waste of money!

Its rude to return a gift you just say thankyou very much even if she never used it

my aunt has always bought me really random things-this year i got a giant toy miaowingcat something kids would get i just said thanks its lovely

Well this thread took a turn.

OP your friend is a rude entitled cow who has no manners.

Even my kids from a very young age knew to say thank you and look grateful regardless.

Some of these responses are wild.

Presents are for the person. They're supposed to like them. That's the whole point!

I'm inclined to agree with this but I guess it does depend on your relationship with the person.

In my family/close group of friends it's standard to say if you don't like it I've got the gift recipes for any kind of personal taste gifts (clothes, jewellery etc) because we don't want things to sit unused in the back of cupboards for years and eventually end up unused in a charity shop - we love the person and want them to enjoy the gift.

However if I got a gift from my boyfriends parents you bet I'd be graciously saying thank you and then just never using it - I don't have the relationship with them where I'd want to risk rocking the boat or making it awkward.

I do disagree with you 'I'll put the baby in it anyway because I'm grateful they thought to buy me a gift' - I can be grateful for the thought and still dislike something enough that I won't use it because I have other options I lie more.

I also disagree with all the 'put baby in it for a picture and send it to them' people - as if new mums, sleep deprived and all, have time to be putting on and taking off multiple outfits from a baby for a photo op, not to mention remembering specifically who got exactly what whilst also having baby brain. A simple thank you upon reception is fine.

So I guess what I'm saying is whether your friend was rude depends how much of a friend she really is. If it was my close friend I'd be fine with it because I want them to enjoy the gift, if it's more of an acquaintance and you have a more formal relationship maybe it's different for you. I agree it's worded funny but maybe she just wrote it clumsily. Either way I don't think it's worth dropping a whole, otherwise good, friendship over. If you're not that good friends in the first place then fine but then I'd question why you're buying baby gifts and taking such offence at someone having personal style.

weasily

For sure. Hand knitted is different though.

The thought, care, time, effort and essentially love that goes in is for me the actual gift.

MIL was a knitter. She died kids too young to remember her. Those clothes she gave are obv huge emotional value.

Not same as baby tops from shop from 'friend'!

“I get the feeling OP would have been naffed off anyway tbh even if effusive thanks... But.

OP?”

@CheeseMmmm I’m sorry but I have no idea what you mean here? You don’t know me at all so why do you ‘get the feeling’ about me?

I was hacked off because my friend was rude. I was literally just trying to buy her kid a nice present!

@Laughingstock91

Does anyone really care that the colour doesn’t suit a 3 month old? Maybe it’s just me!

Our first was a little jaundiced and really didn't suit the outfit I'd picked out for her to go home in. I don't remember it being a problem with the others. So I think it's possible it didn't suit, but it's not something I'd ever say.

@Fairylightsongs

I think it’s a polite way of saying she doesn’t like the colours so wants to change them.

Polite? It's rude!

@CheeseMmmm

Interesting that rather than actually responding to content of posts about my personal view of nature of friendship, point of present is to give something make recipient happy...

Rather. I'm-

Drunk
Found caps lock
Or an MP!!!

Anyone fancy saying yes would be vv grateful for the boobs babygro? Parents preferences when comes baby when comes baby clothes irrelevant?

Or. Why they prefer to have insincere thanks, and present given away/ back wardrobe. Than thanks soz can I exchange. So they get something they like?

And, if a friend. Who you like and likes you. Have good time with. Etc. Would change entire view of them based on a couple words?

Crap friends in first place surely. To think grabby rude awful person over something like this. When otherwise you close etc.

Don't get it. At all.

Yeah I'm with the 🍷 idea and you've found the . on your keyboard.

This was rude.
I try to give gift receipts with baby gifts in case the recipient wants to change them for any reason. I'd rather they have something they want.

[quote Silversprinkles]@tvcc read it again. You've picked it up wrong. That's exactly what the poster means - so easy. [/quote]
Ok fair enough

@bkyyy

My kids are ginger and we get sent stuff that clashes with their hair a lot, have to admit I do just exchange them.

Fuck that, I'm ginger and nothing clashes. Ginger hair goes with everything

I think your friend was rude OP.
On a side note, when my bother’s first child was born, I remember buying him a navy and bright orange sailor-suit type onesie, complete with weird little orange sailor hat. At the time I thought it was really cute, but thinking back, it was embarrassingly hideous!

Rude.
I'd have them send them back return for a refund, then buy one £5 outfit from asda or h&m and text to say you hope they like the colour.

My kids are ginger and we get sent stuff that clashes with their hair a lot, have to admit I do just exchange them.

What colours clash with ginger hair? I’m intrigued.

[quote Laughingstock91]@betwixtlives yes! ‘We got your parcel today. Sorry the colour doesn’t suit little xxxx. Could we change them please’[/quote]
Hang on, that's not 'no, thank you', that's a polite request to swap them. Odd excuse but not rude. I exchanged loads of presents I received, mainly due to size. Perhaps she's received heaps of similar and would rather swap for size up in something season appropriate?