To not feel comfortable using work's unisex toilets

Youdoyoutoday · 19/01/2022 20:54

You need to speak to your boss ASAP and if possible get another female colleague or a few more to join you.

Good luck

sadpapercourtesan · 19/01/2022 20:55

I would HATE this. I would avoid using the toilets if at all possible, and would dread my period.

Increasingly, nobody cares about that, though. It's only women.

Totallydefeated · 19/01/2022 20:56

I’d be v unhappy with this and wouldn’t give a monkey’s toss whether anyone judged my concerns to be ‘old-fashioned’. It’s an affront to privacy and dignity. It’s all very well the men not caring, but the women do. Can you band together to raise a joint concern?

Yummymummy2020 · 19/01/2022 20:58

Yeah I would be so self conscious. I wouldn’t like it. The thought of the noise of taking a pad off with a man in there is uncomfortable for me, though it may seem stupid to others.

withgraceinmyheart · 19/01/2022 20:58

I voted YANBU based on your description, but it depends on the set up.

Are they cubicles with the sinks outside? Are the doors floor to ceiling?

If they’re self contained rooms with proper doors I’d be fine with it, otherwise no.

TheNeverEndingOver · 19/01/2022 20:59

We had this in my last office and it wasn’t that bad as it was individual closed cubicles with skins and mirrors inside etc. In the end though, they did allocate cubicles for males and females, so if it’s the same set up you could suggest this

Iamanicepersonreally · 19/01/2022 21:00

I’m in exactly the same position. My employer is moving offices into a different building and all of the toilets are unisex. The move date is getting closer and I’m dreading it

HalfShrunkMoreToGo · 19/01/2022 21:00

Are they unisex as in self contained cubicles with floor to ceiling doors and sink all in the cubicle.

Or unisex as in, anyone can use them, shared sinks and someone could look under the door?

They are also legally required to provide sanitary bins in each toilet.

Fair play for women have a lot of information that may be useful

fairplayforwomen.com/toilet-provision-in-the-uk/

IDontKnow00 · 19/01/2022 21:00

This happened with my company OP. I didn't mind but can understand why someone would mind. There were a number of females that started speaking up about this saying they did not like it. Management definitely took them seriously and they changed a couple of the toilets to female only and a couple to male only and the rest are unisex. I would say definitely bring it up if you're not comfortable with it.

OnceuponaRainbow18 · 19/01/2022 21:01

Ours are mixed sex at work- just ‘staff’ hadn’t even it a second thought to be honest

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 19/01/2022 21:01

Are they single enclosed (floor to ceiling) rooms with their own sinks?

Or those sort of cubicle doors inside a large room with sinks out of the cubicles?

MrsTophamHat · 19/01/2022 21:01

Agree that it depends on the set up.

Our work toilets are unisex but full, brick walls with self contained sinks and all contain sanitary bins. I don't have an issue with these.

Lockheart · 19/01/2022 21:01

It rather depends on the set up. Are they just cubicles or individual little rooms? I've worked in lots of places where there's just one toilet so of course it's unisex, and that's fine. But it's very different if it's got urinals and more 'flimsy' cubicles with gaps.

IDontKnow00 · 19/01/2022 21:03

@IDontKnow00

This happened with my company OP. I didn't mind but can understand why someone would mind. There were a number of females that started speaking up about this saying they did not like it. Management definitely took them seriously and they changed a couple of the toilets to female only and a couple to male only and the rest are unisex. I would say definitely bring it up if you're not comfortable with it.

I just wanted to add that ours are fully self contained rooms with toilets, sinks and sanitary bins and there were still people who were uncomfortable and my company still changed a couple to female only based on feedback.

sheiselectric · 19/01/2022 21:03

You are absolutely not unreasonable. The school I work at has us in bubbles and we have designated toilets. Mine is the men's. Hate the bloody noise the sanitary towel bin makes and how I always seem to be on when there is another man in there. Piss all over the toilet seats (I know women can be grim too but in 6 years at the school, pissy seats was never a problem until I had to start sharing with men). I broke bubble rules and started sneakily using the women's because I hated it so much. Speak to management- it's not ok.

ScrumptiousBears · 19/01/2022 21:04

I agree with Pp and I would check what type they are. I've been to a huge companies HQ and every toilet was self co rained similar to disabled ones with sink etc in the room. It wasn't a room with "stalls" in where you stand next to your male colleague washing your hands.

JuergenSchwarzwald · 19/01/2022 21:05

I think if they are fully self-contained, it's fine, it's a bit like accessible toilets in the likes of Costa.

I don't know why you'd be uncomfortable with that unless you just don't like the idea of having to use a loo a man who isn't family has used.

user1471453601 · 19/01/2022 21:06

How would male colleagues know you were having a period?

And even if they did, for some odd reason, so what? You are all adults. If adult makes don't know that some women have periods, they are v v immature.

Do you share a loo with males at home? I personally don't (all female household), but when I did, it caused no problems. Males are quite capable of hygienic behaviour both in and out of the loo.

user1958493 · 19/01/2022 21:08

Bad enough doing a poo with women listening, let alone men 😩

tectonicplates · 19/01/2022 21:10

@user1471453601 I share my home loo with my DH, not total strangers or work colleagues.

OnTheBoardwalk · 19/01/2022 21:10

@IDontKnow00

This happened with my company OP. I didn't mind but can understand why someone would mind. There were a number of females that started speaking up about this saying they did not like it. Management definitely took them seriously and they changed a couple of the toilets to female only and a couple to male only and the rest are unisex. I would say definitely bring it up if you're not comfortable with it.

This is what happened in my company

The cubicles were self contained but if toilets on both sides opened the doors at the same time the would crash into each other as the gap between them was so small

I think there was a lot of unnecessary flushing by everyone in the toilets

WhiteXmas21 · 19/01/2022 21:11

I worked in a building like this - totally enclosed with sinks etc but unisex rooms. They were very quickly designated to male / female.
Sorry but an awful lot of men are just disgustingly messy.

Witchcraftandhokum · 19/01/2022 21:11

I wouldn't have an issue with this. Men know women have periods, do I'm not going to feel uncomfortable with them hearing a pad and I've washed my hands in front of plenty of men

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 19/01/2022 21:15

@Witchcraftandhokum

I wouldn't have an issue with this. Men know women have periods, do I'm not going to feel uncomfortable with them hearing a pad and I've washed my hands in front of plenty of men

Can you appreciate that other women may think differently to you?

Runnerduck34 · 19/01/2022 21:18

What are the toilets like?
Individual "bathrooms " for want of a better word! with sink and taps so complete privacy or are they just cubicles with shared sink area?

Individual "bathrooms" are OKish though still not keen tbh

But cubicles with shared sinks and mirror area I would hate.

I think female members of staff need to speak up together