He was right- I feel like I'm drowning under it all

[OilyHomer]

I fled a DV relationship nearly three years ago. He and his family told me I wouldn't last the week. I've lasted longer than a week, but I now feel like I'm drowning. My DCs are in therapy for trauma, because of what they went through and saw. I'm on edge all the time because everything is a trigger either for me or for one of the DC

I feel sorry for my DC, and guilty. I've dragged them from a life they knew, to a life in which they're young carers, too skint to get them the furniture they need, and everything is chaotic

I'm sorry. I just needed to get it out

Oh my. You’ve achieved so much today. Well done you!
Your bloody brilliant.

@OilyHomer

It had to have some gold on it, because I've got a tacky as fuck golden turd on my toilet windowsill. I guess we're all a little batshit in this house

@Whatonearth07957

It's worth talking to the school and starting a dialogue so they know the situation and don't allow DC to be picked up by anyone not authorised by you. Consider talking to SS and police to get lines drawn in the sand.

Yep- it's the first thing I did when they started their new schools. The youngest gets a taxi paid for by the LA, and his school knows that only they are allowed to pick him up

When he went through the "bricking it daily" phase, we actually practiced what he'd do if they ever did turn up...

1. Say "ok, I'll come with you. I just need to go and pick up my reading book/coat/whatever or mommy will go ape", do a legger back into school, and find a teacher (they all know)

1. If they grab him, scream. Drop his book on the floor, and they'll loosen their grip to let him pick it up. Then he does a legger

I'm confident (most of the time) that this will never happen. For a start, he thinks I'm too thick to get to the end of the street alone, let alone halfway across the country. But the plan really helped him cope, and he seems so much more chilled now.

The eldest: all the teachers know not to give out any info, or share any pics etc. He's always surrounded by friends, and his boyfriend is about 6ft tall, so I know he's safe walking home etc

The hypervigilant part of my CPTSD doesn't let me rest until I'm sure they're safe. Sometimes I panic if they're five minutes late home from school, but OTOH, I know I have to let them just be kids

No shit! (Oops) They Zell them on Amazon! We had Bojo loo roll at one point too! 🤣

@OilyHomer

Here's an example of my "art"...Picasso I'm not!

I got so sick of seeing "live, laugh, love' everywhere, that I thought I'd create my own for the toilet...

Love this so much

Nah you need to create melas to use your random out of date packets 🤣

@RandomMess

Nah you need to create melas to use your random out of date packets 🤣

Atm I'm eying up an old nightstand and my acrylic paint pens...🙉

Well that's your fun reward activity so why not 🤷🏽‍♀️

Meal planning can wait

Wow! You really are amazing to get out despite the brain washing rubbish you have coped with.

Meep going, you've done the hard part, the rest will get easier as you rediscover yourself and your babies learn they can now relax. Xxxxx

@WorkHardPlayHard1

Wow! You really are amazing to get out despite the brain washing rubbish you have coped with.

Meep going, you've done the hard part, the rest will get easier as you rediscover yourself and your babies learn they can now relax. Xxxxx

I'm hoping so! I only discovered art about a year ago, yet it's a huge part of who I am now! The music and crochet have been there since forever, but I'm discovering new things that I can do!

You have been through a lot and have managed to leave which is difficult to do.

The future, freedom and peace of mind you have given yourself and your children is far more valuable than any material possessions etc. so try not to be so hard on yourself.

You aren't drowning, you are learning to swin again!

Thank you 🤍

You could up with alternate MN family quote art 😆

You've done the right thing for your children and LOTS of adults here can tell you that someone, at some point, should have and could have put them first.

That's what you have done and I am SO proud of you. Message me if you need a handhold. I've been there.

You're brilliant (celebratory flowers not condolences, as you've done something INCREDIBLE) x

Ooh- will someone PM me with what I missed please? Cos nosey

🤣

Sorry, didn't see it but if it's been deleted it was probably goady crap that you don't need to read x

@Royalbloo

Sorry, didn't see it but if it's been deleted it was probably goady crap that you don't need to read x

I've heard aaaaalllll the goady crap. I'm inoffendable

Fwiw, I'm sure that, if needs be, @MNHQ would vouch that I've been here forever, and I'm genuine

@OilyHomer

Right...

The FibroFucked has caught up with me after this morning (worth it though) so I plan to nap for an hour, then tidy at least one of the kitchen cupboards

If you can achieve one thing in a day then it's a good day.

And if you're ill or in pain, getting out of bed, or organising the children from bed is an achievement

He was WRONG!! You’re doing great x

How was your day @OilyHomer?

Search Pinterest for kitchen organisation and other hacks.

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