Was this a dodgy massage?!

[Dodgyornotdodgy]

I swear I am NOT a troll - MNHQ can confirm I am a long time poster who has NC. I would particularly like the opinions of masseuses/masseurs but anyone really.

I get massages all the time and this has never happened before.

Masseur (so male - not a problem, have masseurs fairly often too. Not sexist and not assuming all men are pervs).

During the leg portion of my massage he crossed my leg over and massaged the bottom of my thigh. The bottom of my thigh was over my vulva. It was extremely arousing, obviously. I didn’t really know what to say - he did it on both sides.

I guess my AIBU is - AIBU to think this was deliberate and he knows what he is doing?! Or am I just quite sex starved and bizarre?

I realise people will come on being like why didn’t you say anything but 1) I wasn’t really sure if he was doing anything on purpose ajd 2) to be honest it was pleasant!

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@givememarmite

Same neck of the woods as Germany. I’ve had a couple of other massages here before and not experienced the same - tbh the others have worked on my bottom but that didn’t feel sexual at all, purely perfunctory/wouldn’t have crossed my mind that it was anything odd.

I'm crying here at the diagram.

@purpleboy

Op this thread has made me laugh, (the diagrams really) but on reflection I'm with *@PurpleDaisies*. It seems rather inappropriate to laugh at a potential sexual assault. I get the position you mean as DH massages me a lot and that's the area he concentrates on with my legs in the same position as your diagram before we have sex. I think regardless of if it was intentional or not (we can't possibly know) you should report it to someone, you won't be the only one who is uncomfortable and he needs to be told if he is massaging inappropriately, so that no one else has to go through it.

I actually agree with this. There might be many women who feel like they can't say anything because they, like you, aren't sure whether it's intentional. But nobody should ever feel unsure/uncomfortable when they're in such a vulnerable position.

@purpleboy

I feel reassured that someone knows what I am talking about.

Get thee self back there right now op and demand he finish the job!

I don’t think any men would think there was a chance of that being arousing so it does sound accidental.

But what do I know as I wasn’t there. Don’t let anyone minimise your feelings.

Why would he cross your legs to massage the back of your thigh? Surely he would do that when you were lying on your front? For that reason, I would be suspicious about his motives.

@SacharissaCripslock

I don’t think any men would think there was a chance of that being arousing so it does sound accidental.

But what do I know as I wasn’t there. Don’t let anyone minimise your feelings.

I think, at some point in an older man's career, someone will have let him know.

Whether people have told him it's nice or inappropriate is the issue I guess.

Tbh there was actually something else a little odd that I totally forgot about after all this leg business but I’m not sure if I want to mention as I think I will get yells of “drip feed” and troll calls etc…

@TheVolturi

Get thee self back there right now op and demand he finish the job!

Ffs. She might have been assaulted. She didn’t ask to bs touched in a sexually arousing way.

What exactly do you think she should go back and demand?

I think it was intentional, yes. Particularly if he didn't do a similar massage of the rest of that part of your body. I'd guess that he's had plenty of sexual experience, plus he's doing something he's experienced at. It seems very unlikely that he wouldn't know the effect he was having. I imagine women don't complain out of embarrassment. He presumably gets a power kick out of it.

@Dodgyornotdodgy

Tbh there was actually something else a little odd that I totally forgot about after all this leg business but I’m not sure if I want to mention as I think I will get yells of “drip feed” and troll calls etc…

Some of us are actually taking you seriously if you wanted to share.

ProudThrilledHappy - ‘bird feet’ 🤣🤣🤣🤣

@HemanOrSheRa

I know what you mean OP. Years ago I watched a documentary about people's sex lives. There was an Australian male 'escort' who was very popular. They interviewed some of his clients. He was very ordinary looking but did something similar to what you describe as part of 'the service'! He'd be middle aged or so now. Was the masseuse an older Australian man?!

I think I remember this programme and what he described was massaging the lower back and down into the buttocks during intercourse as it was arousing, never had it done to me to comment on whether it was effective

@PurpleDaisies - yes, exactly. It wasn't normal if that makes sense? At least, not to me. It doesn't sit right.

@PurpleDaisies

When it was time to turn from my front onto my back he held a towel up. He couldn’t see me directly BUT I then noticed there was a mirror opposite him and he absolutely could see me from that angle snd was looking/looked away when I saw him.

I spent a bit of time wondering if I should raise this with the spa as a “btw it’s pointless having a mirror there and using a towel as they can see” but then the leg business happened and I forgot all about it

Surely just gave OP a seedball and some peanuts with those bird feet?

😂😂😂

So you mean your inner thigh??

This sounds awfully dodgy to me. He must have known exactly what he was doing. He's relying on you feeling so ashamed you won't say anything to your husband or knows you'll question yourself enough to convince yourself it didn't happen. He needs reporting.

This is the case I recall reading www.cambs.police.uk/news-and-appeals/julian-roddis-voyeurism-sentencing.
Sorry, OP, I’m not trying to worry you but I think it sounds dodgy.

@MissMaple82

No, not my inner thigh. The bottom of my outer thigh

[quote Dodgyornotdodgy]@PurpleDaisies

When it was time to turn from my front onto my back he held a towel up. He couldn’t see me directly BUT I then noticed there was a mirror opposite him and he absolutely could see me from that angle snd was looking/looked away when I saw him.

I spent a bit of time wondering if I should raise this with the spa as a “btw it’s pointless having a mirror there and using a towel as they can see” but then the leg business happened and I forgot all about it[/quote]
Tell them all of it OP.

@Kitfish

Hi Op. I hear you - and unlike some on here I won't take the piss. I once had a massage where teh (male) masseure put his fingers inside my vagina while continuing to massage. I was too embarrassed to say anything but - looking back - I did feel quite violated by this.

quite violated @Kitfish?!

I hope you reported the fucker. That's full on sexual molestation.

@Dodgyornotdodgy

MNHQ might delete this but don’t say I didn’t try (surely I win some sort of diagram award for attempting this though)

This is actually genius art 😂

@Kitfish

Wow - that’s a whole other level I am so sorry!!!!!