Young woman murdered running, what sort of world is this?!?

[irishfarmer]

A young woman was murdered yesterday in Tullamore, Ireland while out for a run at 4pm. It is not a dangerous area, she was on a popular route along the canal, in day light! These things just do not happen here. I am in total shock. It was a random, unprovoked attack. It's just so awful, 23 years old her whole life ahead of her. She was a teacher so had probably just finished work for the day and wanted to de-stress.

AIBU to think this poor girl should have been able to go for a run on a lovely winter afternoon safely? I know I am not BU just don't know where else to post. I am truly shocked and horrified.

I doubt there will be a similar vigil organised by any men though do you?

I am sure men will attend.

I have also heard many grief-stricken men talk about her today - her school principal, a former lecturer, a local TD

@EarringsandLipstick

I doubt there will be a similar vigil organised by any men though do you?

I am sure men will attend.

I have also heard many grief-stricken men talk about her today - her school principal, a former lecturer, a local TD

I know men will attend. I was curious as to whether men would organise a vigil of their own where women could attend.

It is normal for those men whom she knew to be very saddened by this, that is not in question.

The worst thing is that this murderer will no doubt get free legal aid and probably will be found to be of “diminished responsibility” or some other nonsense and have a right jolly old time of it in “prison” at all our expense (speaking as an Irish taxpayer here.) For cut-and-dried cases like this, I really think there’s a good argument for capital punishment. That poor, poor woman and her family. (As a primary teacher myself, I don’t know how her colleagues were able to function in school at all today. And as for her poor pupils…so, so sad.).

RIP Ashling. It seems somehow unnatural to write that about such a young and vibrant woman as you .

How can something like this happen in broad daylight? Did nobody see? Did nobody help her
Don't try blame bystanders,the only person responsible is the person who did this disgusting deed.

I was curious as to whether men would organise a vigil of their own where women could attend

What point are you making here?

@Mufasa1118

I live very near where it happened here in Ireland.

There is a lot that can be done to make things more safe for women.

They should make walkways that are just for women, in all major cities.

So that women can walk home through it safely at night.

For example, they could build a walkway that only women can swipe into with swipe cards.

They should make a subway/tube that is for women only, they should have trains for women only.

As a woman I completely disagree with this.

Stranger attacks are rare.
Women are more at risk from their partner or ex partner.
Alanna Quinn in Ballyfermot was attack by men known to her.

We cannot live in a segregated society. We don't even have cycle paths that go everywhere we need to go - but some how there will be dual swipe access footpaths that go everywhere.

I live in a rural area. I walk in secluded locations alone. I will not allow fear to change my life.

To those who say 'not all men' on this thread you are horribly insensitive and yes all men stand by and let this shit happen to women time and time again.

Condolences to her, a life cut short like that, to her family, her friends, colleagues and pupils. How do they ever start to explain this to her young pupils?

"Mufasa1118 - that's nonsense. It starts with "we want to make women feel safe by giving them safe spaces" and it ends with segregating women, giving them some marginal space in the society and telling them that it's for their safety.
How about work on changing the society instead. How about we stop accepting the excuse that men are some hormonal testosterone-filled beasts who can't help themselves and make the streets safer instead of separating women from normal life?"

I disagree. As we live in a world where the bigger people are constantly hitting, raping and killing the smaller people, I think that the smaller people should have spaces, walkways and trains that are just for them.

And it could still be every woman's choice. You mightnt want to do it. But I personally would like to walk a path home that only women could use. I was chatting to my mum and she said she would like the same thing. Imagine being able to walk home and that you are definitely not going to be killed or raped, as it is a woman only zone.

@EarringsandLipstick

I was curious as to whether men would organise a vigil of their own where women could attend

What point are you making here?

That men in general, not those who knew Aisling, will express momentary concern and then nothing will happen. Normal service will resume. Any lobbying for change will only come from women.

@Elodeastar

I guess the comment about 'men', just bothered me - l kind of understand the gut reaction to behind the comment but it is dangerous territory to label it all men. There will be lots of men equally aghast at what has happened, and it's unfair to group all together.

You are so filled with your own self-importance it’s jarring.

Let us mourn this woman without your bilge.

Women are more at risk from their partner or ex partner.

Exactly.

This Irish Times article captures it well.

www.irishtimes.com/life-and-style/people/ashling-murphy-was-just-going-for-a-run-tomorrow-some-other-woman-will-be-just-going-home-1.4775596

[quote Anotherviewtoyou]@Fidgetty unfortunately not joking. Very disappointing that so many men think now when women are upset and afraid is the time to push their not all men agenda.[/quote]
It may have changed - but I saw this earlier and was horrified so I clicked on it. And the majority of the tweets were people saying now is not the time to be saying not all men

Awful and nothing changes. I watched some old Crimewatch episodes from the 80s recently all full of horrific crimes like this, on lone women on roads, foot paths, even on a train in mid-afternoon. Many of these were unsolved - I hope this case isn't one of those. Poor woman and family.

Women on here saying they disagree with me about there being women only walkways.

Ok you don't want to do it. That's fine. But shouldn't it be a choice for other women?

Not all women are ever going to want the same thing.

But if they made a female only walkway at least women could have a choice to use it if they wanted to. It would be an option available to them.

If women still wanted to walk the main streets and walkways they could too.

It would be important that there are more safety options available. It is still your choice what you use.

But there are very little safety options for women at the moment

Any lobbying for change will only come from women

This is not me subscribing to NAMALT but I disagree. Many men advocate, talk, support change. They've written about it, spoken on national media.

The issue is particularly around our legislation, our policing & our ability to enforce both.

That requires all men & women to make it a priority in terms of voting & pushing for legislative & societal change.

The narrative that men only pay lip-service to supporting ending of violence against women is not true. Not as a blanket statement.

@vixeyann

Awful and nothing changes. I watched some old Crimewatch episodes from the 80s recently all full of horrific crimes like this, on lone women on roads, foot paths, even on a train in mid-afternoon. Many of these were unsolved - I hope this case isn't one of those. Poor woman and family.

It's not going to be. They have he perpetrator. However they need to fully investigate and build the case.

The issue is much more about the inadequate way in which violent men (as in this case) go unchecked & free to commit further violence.

And it could still be every woman's choice. You mightnt want to do it. But I personally would like to walk a path home that only women could use. I was chatting to my mum and she said she would like the same thing. Imagine being able to walk home and that you are definitely not going to be killed or raped, as it is a woman only zone.

I get the theory. I don't agree with it. The same as I don't agree with women being told not to go out at night etc.
But even if I accepted - logistically how do you turn every street in every city, town and village into two spaces - one for women and one for everyone else.
Also it ignores the fact that women are most at risk in their own homes.

@MarshmallowSwede

A world where men feel they have the right to take a woman’s life.

Women have to accept they are violent and day or night you could be murdered. It’s sad to even think this way, but how long have we been asking men not to kill us?

And men wonder why we act afraid when they walk behind us and why we edit our lives so much to avoid unnecessary contact with them.

How many times have each of us mapped a way home to be safe? How many times have we avoided a route so we aren’t attacked? This is the sort of world we live in where we can’t even walk down the road without having to make sure we are not accosted. Even if so called “safe” areas. Women will still risk asses and try to make sure we will be ok.

May this young woman get Justice and I pray for her family to find peace and solace because the pain and grief they must be feeling I can’t imagine.

I'm horrified by this. Devastated by it. Angered too.

But in answer to your questions about checking routes and such like. I don't know why but I have never done this. I never pick routes based on safety or things like that.

I don't feel scared. I don't do the key thing. I listen to music.

I am female. Why am I like this? Why don't I take more precautions?

Should I bring my DD up to be like me? Or a checker? Somewhere in between.

I must be stupid or something.

@Mufasa1118 "female-only" outdoor walkways etc is just so impractical it's not a remotely feasible option.

@Mufasa1118

Women on here saying they disagree with me about there being women only walkways.

Ok you don't want to do it. That's fine. But shouldn't it be a choice for other women?

Not all women are ever going to want the same thing.

But if they made a female only walkway at least women could have a choice to use it if they wanted to. It would be an option available to them.

If women still wanted to walk the main streets and walkways they could too.

It would be important that there are more safety options available. It is still your choice what you use.

But there are very little safety options for women at the moment

It's not making women 'safer' by creating spaces that segregate them from the violent men! And how exactly would you stop the violent men infringing these 'women only spaces' to attack & hurt them anyway?

The solution is not one action - it's societal, it's legislative, it's populist discourse, that combined together effect change.

Someone said "a public place in the middle of the day, did no one help her".

I'ts just been said on the news here that her screams alerted two women who were walking a bit away from her, and they ran to help her. They scared the man off, and sat with her as she died.

RIP Ashling.

What a shame this thread could not have been about her and got turned into "some men".

@Nemorth

I don't either. I don't feel unsafe, as a rule. However, I recognise it's probably a mixture of my ignorance & luck.

I recognise that for many women fear is a huge factor in decisions they take around going out.

@EarringsandLipstick

Any lobbying for change will only come from women

This is not me subscribing to NAMALT but I disagree. Many men advocate, talk, support change. They've written about it, spoken on national media.

The issue is particularly around our legislation, our policing & our ability to enforce both.

That requires all men & women to make it a priority in terms of voting & pushing for legislative & societal change.

The narrative that men only pay lip-service to supporting ending of violence against women is not true. Not as a blanket statement.

Let me rephrase... lobbying for change will mainly be driven by women, and the critical mass of men will continue to treat the issue of male violence as low priority.