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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU- Fellow school mum drives every morning

437 replies

Mybumlooksbig · 13/01/2022 11:36

So..hope this doesn't out me.
We live in a very small close knit area. All kids attend the same school, lots of us live on the same few streets.
Every morning and pick up we ALL walk the kids to school, bar the few who have to rush off to work etc (it's a 5-10 min walk)
One parent on my street... drives! Big 4x4, she has NEVER once walked her DS.
She doesn't work, no where to rush off to. She has no mobility issues etc neither does the child..
Why does this iritate me so much??

Yabu- live and let live
Yanbu- she should be walking

OP posts:
BigMamaFratelli · 13/01/2022 11:49

YABU You have no idea why she drives. She may have crippling anxiety and can't face walking to school with a load of judgey martyr mums. Or IBS and she can't risk the walk taking too long. She may just be lazy. But whatever, it's none of your business

theqentity · 13/01/2022 11:49

You just don't like her, OP. That's all it is.

BrickingIt44 · 13/01/2022 11:50

Doesn't Amanda from Motherland try to make things seem better than they actually are though? Her kids could be whingy little gits on the school run but she wouldn't necessarily tell you that. Or she might have IBS or something as previous posters have said. Would she tell you about that either? Just carry on with your smugness and go about your day

BiggestJulie · 13/01/2022 11:51

It’s everyone’s business, including the people who live near the school, and the children walking. Cars are polluting and the school run accounts for a huge amount of traffic.

I believe cars should be banned within half a mile of primary schools and a mile of secondary - with exceptions for residents within the banned area, and for those with a disabled sticker. Everyone would be healthier and the air the children breathe around the school would be cleaner.

Blackmagicqueen · 13/01/2022 11:51

"She is. She's very "Amanda Motherland" so..."

It does sound like you barely know this woman or anything about her other than she drives yet judge her based on appearance, and what seems quite frankly like jealousy. I wonder who she thinks you resemble?

PinkWaferBiscuit · 13/01/2022 11:51

@theqentity

You just don't like her, OP. That's all it is.
Yep.

They slag her off as a group for being lazy and then OP then comes online to do the same because doing it privately behind her back isn't enough.

Can't imagine for a second why she doesn't want to join you all for a daily walk with how much you obviously dispise her.

SlashBeef · 13/01/2022 11:52

For "close knit" read cliquey and bitchy.
Imagine being so interested in someone else's life.

EatYourVegetables · 13/01/2022 11:52

To anyone who’s saying it’s none of the OP’s business, have you heard of the climate emergency???

YANBU. This pisses me off as well, not because it’s fucking lazy (that’s none of my business), but because it’s massively polluting, affecting the air quality around the school, and because a big car parking near the school where other kids run, scoot and cycle is endangering them.

The catchment for our school is tiny and yet so many lazy asses insist on driving and parking like absolute idiots 🙄🙄🙄

Blossomtoes · 13/01/2022 11:52

Does she drive straight home or go somewhere else? I’d be so pissed off to be watched and judged like this. Mind your own business @Mybumlooksbig.

Blackmagicqueen · 13/01/2022 11:53

How old are her dc? Does she just have one? Young children are exhausting and like to drag their heels! It may be an easier way of being on time for her, who knows what her morning is like.

Seeline · 13/01/2022 11:54

Have you offered to walk her DCs with yours?

Ionlydomassiveones · 13/01/2022 11:54

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn at the poster's request.

willitevergetwarm · 13/01/2022 11:55

I couldn't drive when my DD was in school and used to get questioned (by the clicky mums who all had big cars) about why we walked the 1 mile each way every day - can't win it seems

UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme · 13/01/2022 11:56

It's not none of the OP's business because it does impact her and her children.

Everyone who drives children to school makes the area around the school less safe for those children walking.

If everyone walked it would be much safer to walk and more children could walk without needing an adult to accompany them.

In countries/ regions where driving children to school is socially unacceptable children walk in groups and children over 6 or 7 don't typically get accompanied - very little traffic and no entitled dangerous parking around school means this is possible.

It's very much a snowball effect in either direction - more parents drive and park / stop and drop off near school means its less safe to walk so more parents drive and so on.

mistermagpie · 13/01/2022 11:59

What's it's got to do with you?

Maybe she doesn't like you and being forced to walk to school with you every day is her idea of hell?

You might want to have a look at taking up a hobby or some volunteer work or something, if you've got so much time to spend thinking about this, it might be more fulfilling.

Stellaris22 · 13/01/2022 12:00

I do worry about the knock on effect to kids when parents drive them everywhere. I've seen a Dad on my street (we walk) cave in because his kid refused to walk and wanted to be driven. It happens regularly.

Jumping in a car for short drives that can be walked should be discouraged, I'm fed up of near misses around school where kids are nearly hit and the idling engine fumes.

hangrylady · 13/01/2022 12:00

Get a life. Maybe she doesn't want to walk with the other bitchy, judgemental mums (you).

Blackmagicqueen · 13/01/2022 12:00

"everyone walked it would be much safer to walk and more children could walk without needing an adult to accompany them."

Op said they do ALL walk though didnt she. Just this one lady apparently who could have any number of valid reasons.

SituationCritical · 13/01/2022 12:01

This post really reminded me of how much I rejoice at never having to do the primary school run/judgemental bitch fest ever again.

Sirzy · 13/01/2022 12:01

I am all for people walking when they can and get frustrated at the level of traffic at school run time. But I don’t know the ins and outs of anyone reasons for driving so I don’t judge individuals.

I have to drive DS to school. His disability means he can’t do the walk and a full day at school. If I ever have to nip to school for whatever reason during the day I walk because I can.

Witheringtong · 13/01/2022 12:01

Do people really think that kids with arthritis qualify parents for a ''disabled sticker''? Do you have any idea how difficult it is to get a diagnosis for joint pain in a child?

Blackmagicqueen · 13/01/2022 12:02

Has op said how old the child is and how many she has?

UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme · 13/01/2022 12:02

mistermagpie of course it is to do with the OP - people who drive to and park outside school endanger children who walk or cycle, especially when lots of people do it.

Stellaris22 · 13/01/2022 12:03

I don't see it as judgemental, just fed up of cars everywhere making the school run dangerous and unsafe when some parents could just leave the car at home.

Comedycook · 13/01/2022 12:03

Even if she doesn't have any health/mobility issues and is just lazy...which is most likely, it's her right to be so.