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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

How often should I shower?

999 replies

grosstonotshower · 12/01/2022 10:36

Ok so I'm having a few drinks with friends last night. We are all female a mix of parents and non parents. One friend mentions she is struggling to find time for o shower every day since she had her baby. I said "well I don't shower every day without a young baby," All of my friends looked at me in horror. Apparently even the ones with kids shower daily. Full disclosure I have two dd one under five and I work part time. I shower on work days plus one extra day so usually three times a week my days off usually consist of playing at home, walking dog, school run and maybe park. I would shower extra if exercising/having sex/on period etc. I bath my dc three times a week. My oh works out every week day so he does shower more than me. AIBD? (Disgusting 😂)

OP posts:
PurpleRainlnTheSky · 12/01/2022 23:31

@LubaLuca

Sorry, I misread your post I quoted. But tired. Been a long day!

I re-read it and see you said we should NOT be the same as we were pre 1980s, and should NOT be setting it as the benchmark. And I agree with that. Bad hygiene is unacceptable and just because we used to do something 50 years ago, does NOT mean we need to do it now.

PurpleRainlnTheSky · 12/01/2022 23:32

BIT tired! ARGH...Get an edit button MN please!

Dogmum40 · 12/01/2022 23:36

I have severe eczema in a lot of places on my body so don’t bath/shower everyday! The flair up and agony I suffer daily is awful anyway so showering twice a day or even daily knowing what happens isn’t worth the pain! When I do shower I can’t have a steaming hot shower and have to be careful when I’m in there!

Doesn’t showering several times a day damage skin/dry it out?

I prob shower every couple of days/few days (basically as little as I can get away with due my issue) I do clean myself by the sink every morning in a very calculated way if that counts 😆

VanGoghsDog · 12/01/2022 23:38

@PurpleRainlnTheSky

Exactly *@Kanaloa* it's much easier to hop in the shower, than it is to faff about washing your pits, tits, and bits in the kitchen sink with a fecking flannel! Confused
Why would people be washing at the kitchen sink? I wash in the bathroom.

And people DID make ablist comments. People said not showering daily is (variously) grim, gross, minging etc. Some people pointed out that due to disabilities they can't shower daily. The implication is that disabled people are grim, gross, minging etc.
So, realising what they had done they said "oh no, not if you're disabled, of course!'.
And people said "so, disabled people who don't shower every day are not grim, gross, minging etc, but non disabled people who don't, are?". Somehow......

It's not logical at all. And it is ablist.

Swonderful · 12/01/2022 23:39

I actually don't like showering. Just don't like the feeling of getting wet and cold so I just do my pits etc each morning and have a shower when my hair needs it. Some people smell more than others and luckily I don't smell. Who cares what others think tbh!

VanGoghsDog · 12/01/2022 23:42

@PurpleRainlnTheSky

It's not easier to shower, no. I've explained why already, as have many other people. I probably shower alternate days. On the days I don't it doesn't mean I have wet flannels around because I use a clean one every day. I use it in the evening for my face whether I shower or not because I don't cleanse my face in the shower, I do it at the sink. With a clean flannel. And on the days I don't shower I use the flannel once more for my wash. On the days I do shower it doesn't get used again but goes on the laundry anyway and I use a clean one that evening for my face.

Swonderful · 12/01/2022 23:42

Seriously? Comparing sexual harassment to showering less than every day. Hmm

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 12/01/2022 23:46

Thank you @VanGoghsDog! You'll just be ignored now by @Purple as they don't have an answer

PurpleRainlnTheSky · 12/01/2022 23:48

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

OldieWordly · 12/01/2022 23:49

I am lucky to be able to have a shower every day, but know that there are so many people around the world who have to be very careful with water consumption. Either through lack of a regular supply or the cost of it.

It wasn't that long ago that a huge, comparatively well off city like Cape Town in South Africa was at the brink of running oout of water. Only after a campaign on how to conserve it such as going a few days without showering that disaster did not strike.

I am also mindful about the BBC news item yesterday about parents in Afghanistan unable to wash their children because they had no money to buy food, never mind water.

So I quite admire those who stand up and declare they only shower every other day or so. If they don't smell, what's the problem?

Kanaloa · 12/01/2022 23:50

@Dogmum40

I have severe eczema in a lot of places on my body so don’t bath/shower everyday! The flair up and agony I suffer daily is awful anyway so showering twice a day or even daily knowing what happens isn’t worth the pain! When I do shower I can’t have a steaming hot shower and have to be careful when I’m in there!

Doesn’t showering several times a day damage skin/dry it out?

I prob shower every couple of days/few days (basically as little as I can get away with due my issue) I do clean myself by the sink every morning in a very calculated way if that counts 😆

I imagine showering ‘several times a day’ would definitely dry your skin out. But (much like those who wash once a week) I think people showering several times a day are the minority.
VanGoghsDog · 12/01/2022 23:52

@PurpleRainlnTheSky

.
Glad you've admitted it.
Heyupourkid · 12/01/2022 23:53

I used to shower every morning when working, now a Sahm and it we're staying in or just walking the dog nearby, I don’t shower. I don’t really like having a shower, is that weird 🤷🏻‍♀️

VanGoghsDog · 12/01/2022 23:56

@Heyupourkid

I used to shower every morning when working, now a Sahm and it we're staying in or just walking the dog nearby, I don’t shower. I don’t really like having a shower, is that weird 🤷🏻‍♀️
I don't really like it much either. And as I don't need to every day and it's none of anyone's business - I don't!

I used to every week day when I commuted, before leaving for work and before bed as trains make me feel grotty. Then I'd not bother Saturday unless I was going out, then Sunday I'd shower in the afternoon after my long walk.

Now I don't commute I don't bother as much. And I go swimming about three times a week too so shower at the pool.

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 12/01/2022 23:58

@PurpleRainlnTheSky

.
Point proven.
Lifeisnteasy · 12/01/2022 23:59

This reminds me of that thread where OP wanted to know if she should be using soap in the shower rather than just water Confused

AllThingsServeTheBeam · 13/01/2022 00:01

@Heyupourkid

I used to shower every morning when working, now a Sahm and it we're staying in or just walking the dog nearby, I don’t shower. I don’t really like having a shower, is that weird 🤷🏻‍♀️
I see it as a chore. It's not a pleasant thing to do for me. Like washing the dishes. I used to like a bath, but haven't managed for years an years.
Lifeisnteasy · 13/01/2022 00:02

Anyway I shower most days, but wash hair every other day - the days in between I use the shower head to wash my body. If I’m slobbing around the house all day or in a massive rush I will just have a quick flannel wash under the armpits in the sink. Clean underwear & top every day.

I laugh when I see people say they shower once a week but definitely don’t smell. They’re clearly nose blind.

OldieWordly · 13/01/2022 00:04

@Heyupourkid

I used to shower every morning when working, now a Sahm and it we're staying in or just walking the dog nearby, I don’t shower. I don’t really like having a shower, is that weird 🤷🏻‍♀️
Not weird at all.

I often want to stay in my nightwear all day when not working. It is such a faff getting a shower, as due to dry skin with some eczema patches I have to labouriously apply body cream all over afterwards. So no quick 2 minute shower for me!

However, I then feel guilty and worry about what if I have an accident and need to go to hospital. So need to have clean body and clean underwear on. So then I eventually cave in and have a shower.

I do though think afterwards, that I feel much better. It always improves my mood, funnily enough. Smile

LadyJJ · 13/01/2022 00:05

Bath twice a week never shower unless I'm staying somewhere without a bath.
Have a good wash with a flannel at least every day.
I hate showers, but each to their own.

OldieWordly · 13/01/2022 00:08

I shower every day, but don't wash my hair. That may be washed once a fortnightly sometimes! Washing my type of hair too often, will cause more harm than good.

Dogmum40 · 13/01/2022 00:10

Yeah it can’t be good for skin but then again I am jealous of people who just jump in the shower whenever they want because for me imagine a scenario where you roll around in broken glass then set yourself on fire! That’s my day to day life so showering is like pouring fuel on that fire whist simultaneously sticking knives into me!

I am chuckling at this thread! I think it Should go into classics 😆

I am very obsessed with how I smell and look so do regularly ask people if I’m ok and want an honest answer! I might look like Freddie Kruger but I think smelling like shrek is another matter! And so far after shockingly not showering regularly I can confirm I don’t stink!

MaybeHeIsMyCat · 13/01/2022 00:16

You can stay perfectly clean just with washing and not an actual shower
I have cared for people that have no mobility, haven't been in a shower or bath for a decade and are washed in bed, they don't smell because they're properly washed. And you do it without soaking the bed!
Hot water, soap and a bit of friction with a flannel. As long as you wash, it doesn't have to be a bath or shower

AllThePogs · 13/01/2022 00:21

@Lifeisnteasy

This reminds me of that thread where OP wanted to know if she should be using soap in the shower rather than just water Confused
A friend told me she hadn't used soap for years. I was surprised, but I couldn't tell.
PigFan · 13/01/2022 00:22

@Lifeisnteasy

Anyway I shower most days, but wash hair every other day - the days in between I use the shower head to wash my body. If I’m slobbing around the house all day or in a massive rush I will just have a quick flannel wash under the armpits in the sink. Clean underwear & top every day.

I laugh when I see people say they shower once a week but definitely don’t smell. They’re clearly nose blind.

I’m the only one who said that. Laugh away.

I don’t smell and as I said I'm disabled so CANT shower often, doesn’t mean I don’t clean myself.. Glad you're enjoying yourself laughing at me.