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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Woman across the street staring into my house

390 replies

Littlejayx · 07/01/2022 13:57

I live on a busy road in a large village, over the past few weeks I have been home more due to home working starting up again. I used to get alerts from my lighting system that ‘living room had been triggered’ and thought it must be passing traffic, until I was sat down working today to see a neighbour stood scouring my whole living room (not seeing me due to positioning) then light sensor turned on (was off as I hadn’t moved)

I’ve had quite a few run ins with her about letting her dog foul outside my front door/drive, using my bins and trying to stop my Gardner trimming hedges. What do I do? 😩 last time I spoke to her she shouted at me on the street and threatened to report me for assault!

I’m living alone with two young children and hate the thought of her stood looking in my house

OP posts:

Thread gallery

Godsplan21 · 07/01/2022 17:16

The setting off the alarm idea is brilliant. She sounds cuckoo so I wouldn't want to be approaching her! I have a dog camera from amazon. You can get them for £20 odd pound. If you can afford to maybe get one to place in your window in case you ever need evidence, it might make you feel better as well.

ChiefStockingStuffer · 07/01/2022 17:19

Confront her calmly each and every time, but have your phone recording going for every encounter to prove you have been calm, polite and clear about her behaviour.

AdoraBell · 07/01/2022 17:36

I was going suggest setting up some kind of sound alarm.

crazeelala2u · 07/01/2022 17:37

@Littlejayx

I have a small wall and pointless 3ft yard to the window so she’s walking past the front door into the pointless yard to stare in 😩

I would quite literally, walk out, yelling "Is there something I can help you with?".

Nosey people make me annoyed. And I've done this before to passers by.

tommyhoundmum · 07/01/2022 17:39

Be very careful. So many people have mental health problems these days. You don't want anything to escalate. If you are going to say something I suggest "can I help you?" Tread carefully.

BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation · 07/01/2022 17:43

Take a photo of her then get it printed out on shiny paper. Get a large glass jar, fold the paper so it outlines the inside of the jar then add some meat offcuts and water coloured with red food dye. Put it in the window and it'll look like her decapitated head in a jar staring back at her 🤪

Wonnle · 07/01/2022 17:51

Trip wire connected to a blank shotgun cartridge might do the trick , you used to be able to buy them as intruder alarms

meemaww · 07/01/2022 17:55

I like the alarm idea. Could you put pots of spiky plants in the pointless yard or maybe stand and film her on your mobile if she tries to do it again?

NewMessageFrom · 07/01/2022 17:58

@Mummy10197

I wouldn’t class going on Love Island and being thrown hundreds of brand deals ‘working my ase off’. People who work every hour under the sun just to make sure there’s bread on the table for their kids work their ase off. Not being offered £1 million deal to put some clothes on and get photos. So so out of touch with the real world, it’s sad

Lol, think you wanted the Molly Mae thread??

furbabymama87 · 07/01/2022 18:04

Are you sure she's really staring in and it's not just her dog's favourite place to go to the toilet? At night when I walk my dog down the street some people have their blinds wide open with lights on and though I don't purposefully look, sometimes I can't help but glance at the window if the house is like a goldfish bowl.

Wonnle · 07/01/2022 18:07

@furbabymama87

If it is it's on the OPs property !

Solicitors letter threatening prosecution for trespass ?

TragoCardboardCopper · 07/01/2022 18:10

@meemaww

I like the alarm idea. Could you put pots of spiky plants in the pointless yard or maybe stand and film her on your mobile if she tries to do it again?

Put the spiky plants behind where she stands, then set the alarm off.

The film of her pulling cactus spines out of her arse will be much more entertaining!

SurferRona · 07/01/2022 18:15

C’mon PPs, the correct mumsnet response here is motion activated alarm which will shout out to her: “Trunky want a bun?”

Clash22 · 07/01/2022 18:18

Frosted self adhesive window film is yr friend here. I live in a village but on the main street. Moved here a few yrs ago and then totally renovated the property in full.

Every sod who walked past my house, felt it appropriate to stick their noses up against my windows... leaving their T zone nose oil on my panes. I have even been in the room at the time they were looking. Cheeky feckers.

I bought the self adhesive frosting, applied it to my lower panes.. easy to apply, nosey parkers eradicated! Lets light in, keeps nosey sods out.

GlamorousHeifer · 07/01/2022 18:32

Personally I would get one of those evil clown masks and wait underneath the window for her....let the kids give you the nod for the perfect timing. I'd jump up wailing and screaming like a flipping banshee
Then I would be laughing hysterically at her as she took her scardy arse home hopefully never to be seen again!

AdobeWanKenobi · 07/01/2022 18:49

@Bluntness100

You’re sitting in yout living room in the dark and she comes up and stares in your window?

I've read all of OP's posts three times now and cant see where she says she's sat in the dark.

She does say she's sat in a position that cant be seen from the window though, and as she posted this at 2pm I would assume it's not dark where she is, unless she's in Norway and forgot to mention that.

Original poster

Littlejayx · 07/01/2022 20:02

My favourite is the head in jar so far….

As previous posters have brought up I am on the side of caution as atm I do have police involvement with the removal of my abusive partner from the property so my paranoid self is wondering if she’s looking at things to report back? I don’t know.

To answer pp my living room is quite large and the window is set back off the road with a pointless little 6 brick high walk about three feet from the road so she’s doing it purposefully and has done so again today as it’s been heavily snowing and there’s foot prints in the snow out front and they certainly aren’t mine 😂😩

OP posts:

Original poster

Littlejayx · 07/01/2022 20:03

My brother has suggested adding a tiny gate with a bell on it but I’m just going to speak to her when she no doubt does the same thing tomorrow and we are in all day!

OP posts:

RosiePosieDozy · 07/01/2022 20:04

I personally would ignore. You could get some blinds.

Thundercats77 · 07/01/2022 20:32

Tell her you do not appreciate her peering in on your young children....
That might scare the crap out of her and shake her up a bit?

Even if your children are never there while you are working, she is aware that you have kids and how this maybe perceived.

Bluntness100 · 07/01/2022 21:55

I've read all of OP's posts three times now and cant see where she says she's sat in the dark.She does say she's sat in a position that cant be seen from the window though, and as she posted this at 2pm I would assume it's not dark where she is, unless she's in Norway and forgot to mention that.

She says the sensor had not come on as she hadn’t moved. Which signals if she had moved it would have come on, and it was clearly dark enough for the light to come on when the neighbour approached rhe window, which is what she said alerted her.

Hankunamatata · 07/01/2022 22:13

You can get glass replaced in the windows that's mirrored on outside but clear inside so you can see out but none can see in, mate lives in a busy high street with windows directly onto pavement. Or get privacy film

GenderCriticalTrumpets · 07/01/2022 22:21

I absolutely love the idea of scaring the fuck out of her. Don a white shirt, covered in red food dye and wait for her on your sofa. When she peers in lurch towards the window shouting brainnnssssssssssss. Otherwise - Have you got a windowsill? Put spiky plants on it?

BeefSupreme · 07/01/2022 22:29

Set up some “Home Alone” style booby traps in your front garden.

fucketyfuckwit · 07/01/2022 22:34

I would put a note inside that says something like
You are being filmed, the police have also been called. Leave my property immediately and never return,

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