To want to knock her lights out?

[AngryMumOfTwo]

Hi,

I've nc'ed to be anon with this.

I'm quite upset because this note was stuck to our door overnight.

A bit of background. We've moved into this privately rented flat about 4 years ago, when our daughter was only 1. She is now 5. We have just had our second (and last) over Christmas. Like all newborns, she cries at night sometimes. She isn't too bad to be honest, at least we didn't think she was. Our oldest did cry a lot.

We get along with most people who live here. We're generally quiet and private as is all the other residents. Over 50% of them are elderly, though this isn't a retirement block of flats. We're the youngest, but there are others not much older then us.

We don't know who left the note. It is obviously unsigned. We have our suspicions but that's all. If they had knocked on the door and spoken to us, that wouldn't be a problem.

For their own sake, they better hope I don't find out who it is. I'm furious. It's horrid. The residents we've spoken to over the last few days have said how lovely she is but no noise complaints. Our immediate neighbours and the lady directly below are nice people so I don't think it's them.

I'm not sure what else I can really do about this. I had to vent my anger somewhere, sorry. My partner is angry but also found it amusing.

Is there no management team for the flats? Or residents association?
I would find that very threatening, the tone is disgusting. I would report to either the management company or council.

If not, I would post a big notice where it can be seen, saying about the note and how vile the resident is who wrote it. I would also add you've reported their vile words as threatening behaviour and harassment and will hope the police find out soon the culprit.

I would stick it somewhere prominent for everyone to see, with an annotation saying "only cowards leave anonymous notes".

Shame on them!

@WalkersAreNotTheOnlyCrisps

One post OP hey 🤔

FFS. OP posted just over an hour ago.

Did you miss the bit where they have a newborn? And a 5yr old?! Perhaps they might be a little busy?!!!

To be fair not everyone wants to hear ops little angel all night. Noise is noise wherever it comes from. Personally I wouldn't breed (which is the correct technical term for what is happening) in an area unsuitable and this sounds like the flat largely inhabited by older people might not be the best area. So can certainly see their point perhaps they could put their TV on loud whilst the baby is trying to sleep.

This is awful. No wonder you are upset! I would leave the note where it is so everyone can read it and see what they have done! No doubt someone knows who it is.

@Notonthestairs

I'd leave the note up (so all can see just how unpleasant it is) and not respond further.

I understand why you'd be upset but a) whoever sent the note is too cowardly to talk direct to you so screw them and b) there is nothing you can do.

Please do put it to the back of your mind. Life is tough enough with a newborn and a young child

I agree. Leave it up, or put it on the notice board for the whole building to see

You have done nothing wrong - you know this - I’d want the rest of the building to know that you’re being abused like this and they’ll work out who it is and the egg will be on their face.

@DropYourSword

I’d be tempted to photocopy the note so there was a copy for each resident, then write on it,

I have loved here 5 years. I am most disappointed to discover this anonymous note has been posted to me from someone I have been neighbours with for years. If you didn’t send this to me, please accept this as a heads up that this is deemed acceptable by someone who lives here. If you did send me this, I say with the upmost respect...go fuck yourself.

I think making copies and sending it to all your neighbours asking if it was them is a good idea. That way everyone will know what a disgusting thing that person has written.

This is really nasty, what horrible people! If it was me, I’d photocopy it and post it through every door in the building asking the writer to contact me directly. Then all the non-nasty neighbours will see just how vile this person is. Congratulations on your new baby!

Perhaps they might be a little busy?!!!

Yeah I'm sure it's that. (?!!!)

I'd also say it's unlikely to be elderly neighbours, unless they are particularly vile.

Our elderly neighbours always tell us not to worry about noise, especially kid noise. One of them can't hear well anyway so doesn't care, and they also have had kids themselves and know what it's like.

Bloody hell thats horrendous!

I would photocopy the note and send it to all the residents, asking them to speak to you directly if they have a problem rather than resorting to unpleasant anonymous notes, and letting them know that you’ve shared this note with everyone in the building.

I’m very sorry you have received such a spiteful note - I have a 14 week old and would have been gutted to receive a note like this, you’re already knackered and hormonal post birth so this type of thing would have really upset me!

I really doubt that the vast majority of people would agree with this vile person so I echo pps and would write a polite response and post to everyone in the building if you can, saying you weren’t sure who the author was so you have replied to everyone. I think most of your neighbours would be disgusted!

Congratulations on your lovely new baby and I hope this hasn’t taken the shine off for you.

@Okbye

If I got a note like this I’d be more inclined to let the baby ‘cry it out’ at night. I’d also make sure to put the washing machine on and do some hoovering, maybe move some heavy furniture about too ☺️

Why would you do this and risk upsetting everyone else? Honest to God I seriously worry about the state of our society when I read replies like this and @SerendipityJane Go and speak to your neighbours then put the note in a drawer incase anything else happens Congratulations on your newborn , don't let them spoil it

@WalkersAreNotTheOnlyCrisps

One post OP hey 🤔

She's probably doing the school run

@WalkersAreNotTheOnlyCrisps

One post OP hey 🤔

She also said she's name changed...

That isn't an old persons handwriting, they write like my 12 year old.

I disagree, I’m the wrong side of middle age by quite a stretch and that writing could easily come from someone in my gen as that’s exactly how we were taught to write at school and while some of us (like myself) quickly degenerated into pretty much unreadable handwriting, I have seen this style among some people my age.

Can I just say, @AngryMumOfTwo, this is exactly the sort of MN thread the DM and other tabloids love, so if you don't want your neighbours finding out that in your sleep-deprived and justifiably annoyed state you've contemplated knocking their lights out, you might want to get MN to take it down.

Congratulations on your new baby!

She also said she's name changed...

I can read thanks 👍🏼

How nasty and cowardly. I like the suggestion of pinning it up on the noticeboard with free earplugs!

@WalkersAreNotTheOnlyCrisps

She also said she's name changed...

I can read thanks 👍🏼

But chose to be awkward anyway? Nice

Stick the note back up on the entrance to your block. Add on something like:

“All of us were babies once, all of us cried, most of us grew up.”

It's a difficult one, OP. Living in a shared space is hard. I've had neighbours complaining about me, when I wasn't doing anything excessive. The note would really give me the rage though.

Can you put on some white noise to drown out the crying a bit? It wouldn't bother me at all because I can sleep through anything but some people are very noise sensitive.

Why have you let it anger you so much op?

Being elderly and living in a private rented flat- I wouldn’t judge normally but they are in no position to question your life choices.

"Awkward" 🤔

Pin the note and a suitable reply to the front door of the flats for all to see.