To expect a 5 and 8 year old to be able to pack their own overnight bag?

[CrumpledCrumpet]

I’ve asked 8 and 5yo DS’s to pack PJs and a change of clothes in a bag about half an hour ago. Despite increasingly stroppy reminders from me to stay on task, no progress is being made. AIBU to expect children of their age to be able to do this? I’m exasperated!

Just pack the bags. Why create a situation that stresses you out?

YANBU - My toddler will pack their bag for a day out (spare clothes/jacket) when asked

Pyjamas and one set of clothes- of course that's ok. I'm surprised everyone is so shocked. My 8 year old old has always moved packing she does her holiday case let alone one set of clothes

Aged 5, I'd have the bag in my room and tell DS to fetch X PJ'S, then send him back for Y sets of clothes then bathroom stuff. But keeping an eye on it. Aged 8 I'd tell themX PJ'S, Y sets of clothes and bathroom stuff, but still cast an eye over it.

Depends how often you do it tho. If it is every other weekend, they will get there much sooner than a child who only stays away from home every 6 months.

No, YANBU, but I guess it depends on individual kids. Some are more capable than others.

At that age I used to stand in my room and shout "pyjamas!" and they would go off and get them, then "pants!" and off they'd go again until we were done. Worked for us as a system to make into a sort of game, they would race each other to be back first.

@bestdhever

I just asked my 8 yr old...what would you pack if I asked you to pack for one night away. Her answer... My teddy Clothes Pjs Socks Underwear My rubix cube A book And my toothbrush

I feel like that was 🙌 (although a hairbrush would be fab too!)

I forgot to pack a hairbrush in my hospital bag when I was expecting DD. Two days in labour in the height of the summer heat and another night staying over, I looked like a rats nest by the time I got home.

Guess my DS5 must have learning difficulties then, because he wouldn’t manage this.
What an unnecessarily shitty thing to say.

Of course not, you nincompoop!

8 year old yes, but boy will definitely need a bit supervision (not enough underwear, no towel etc). Girl very meticulous and will quiz me exactly how many days, what activities, will there be clean towels, is there a laundrette... to the point of my exasperation.

5 year old - mine used to stuff a suitcase full of toys and teddies and I'd repack :)

8yo yes of course, with a little practice.

5yo would need help.

The question is, have you (or another adult) trained them to do this? Helped them, then supervised them while they try?

You cannot just make a demand for which the child is unprepared.

My last post was meant to quote @OGenkiDesuKabut I guess I hit reply instead of quote.

8yo - yes (but would check and cull as appropriate)
5yo - would do together

@Aquamarine1029

You are being ridiculously unreasonable, especially about the five year old. Is this a joke?

Exactly. My 9yr old could not my 5 Yr old

5 yr old with management yes.
8yr old yes.
Mine are 9 and 10 and have been organizing themselves for yrs.
I was going swimming/football on my own at 7 and upwards, packed my own bag, etc.

If I asked my 5 and 6 year old to pack a change of clothes it. They would pack spiderman dress up. With no underwear or socks . Dd is 11 I would need to check hers as she would forget to pack a jumper incase its chilly or somthing

They still need supervision at this age.

@DropYourSword

Guess my DS5 must have learning difficulties then, because he wouldn’t manage this. What an unnecessarily shitty thing to say.

Your 5 year old really couldn't manage if your said 'get some pyjamas, an outfit for tomorrow and some pants and socks'

@Totalwasteofpaper

8 year old fine and you check after 5 year old no chance

I'm with you.

It's no wonder there are so many posts about helpless teenagers.

I use direct instructions. So fetch me your pjs, fetch me your pants and socks, fetch me your clothes (then no, not shorts, its snowing!). Then id place it all in a bag for them neatly. Usually at the end I say get your ipads and one toy if you wish to stop the endless teddies etc.

I can't expect my husband to do that!
My 12 year old I would check. 5y pack for them, 8y pack with them

I have an 8 and a 5 year old and both could easily pack pjs and a pair of clothes. They pick out the clothes they wear each day so would have no issue finding something. I’d have to check they’d picked appropriate clothes and that they’d got everything (socks, underwear) but they absolutely can and have (last Summer) packed their bags for trips away.

They frequently pack a toy bag for trips to Nanny’s too.

Independence is taught, though, by breaking it down into age-appropriate, feasible and achievable chunks and teaching those to foster each specific skill set needed for each specific task.

Not by throwing a 5 year old into the deep end and then getting angry or annoyed when they haven’t got the skills to do it.

@OGenkiDesuKa what a nasty comment