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AIBU?

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Original poster

SIL gone to panto when waiting for PCR result - oh yes she did!

533 replies

anotherannoyngSIL · 30/12/2021 14:47

Name changed as I’ve been slated on here before for not allowing my SIL to do as she pleases.

Today I thought we’d made a positive turn as she has taken my older son and hers to the pantomime as I’ve got a broken leg (though she has made a big thing about helping out).

Unfortunately she’s just text me to say “BTW I’ve had a positive lateral and waiting on my PCR but decided to take the boys anyway as xxx (her son) was looking forward to it, I’m sure that’s fine”.

In which universe is that fine?? She’s risking not just my son, but the others she’s gone with and the whole audience!! She is very jealous if people do social things without her but surely there comes a time when sense is more important than FOMO?? I’m assuming she waited till she was there to tell me so I couldn’t do anything.

Husband says I’m being unreasonable for being annoyed as the rules aren’t clear cut and she hasn’t had the PCR test back.

AIBU for wanting to ban her as she’s so irresponsible and only really cares about herself?

OP posts:
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5
MrsBerthaRochester · 30/12/2021 23:26

Why would you think I was being "snide?" I have remained polite on here in spite of personal attacks. I genuinely wish all a happy new year. I dont wish people to be ill with covid at all but I do believe the time has come to live with it.
And that is my final post or I wont be fit for Hogmanany.

Covidworries · 30/12/2021 23:28

@humdingle
I am angry that a poster is defending someone going to a panto while knowing they are covid positive and sayingnthey would do they same rather than disapoint their children.
Risking a room full of people watching a panto and all the people working is out of order.
Admiting you would do this then wishing people healthy new year is dickish at best

humdingle · 30/12/2021 23:28

A lot of you have been total arseholes to @MrsBerthaRochester and have definitely overstepped the mark. You might be angry at things, but you're misdirecting it.

Now if I was as dramatic as those people I'd be saying "shame on you, how dare you!" Etc etc. I think you know who you are.

youvegottenminuteslynn · 30/12/2021 23:28

@MrsBerthaRochester

Why would you think I was being "snide?" I have remained polite on here in spite of personal attacks. I genuinely wish all a happy new year. I dont wish people to be ill with covid at all but I do believe the time has come to live with it. And that is my final post or I wont be fit for Hogmanany.
Disingenuous and selfish 🙄
FriendshipsAreHardForMe · 30/12/2021 23:29

She's an idiot for lying and for knowingly going.

BUT given Omicron is now known to be much milder and much more contagious, they're predicting everyone will have it in the coming weeks. So really, I think it's about time we live our lives and go out despite Covid. Your son would be fine catching Covid. If anyone is particularly vulnerable to a cold like virus then I'd hazard a guess that the aren't at a pantomime.

Yes she's going again the rules. But the rules need to change now we know what were working with. You can't prevent the unpreventable.

MrsBerthaRochester · 30/12/2021 23:30

2022 has to be better. Right?

Pensieve · 30/12/2021 23:31

I’m really shocked someone would do that after testing positive. There’s naively being asymptomatic and at the other end of the scale there’s wilful neglect. I think it’s also worse it’s a theatre, so inside very close to others for prolonged times.

Pensieve · 30/12/2021 23:31

I hope 2022 will be better for sure. Helluva 2 years we’ve had and wish I would have done a diary.

dittheringdoldrums · 30/12/2021 23:33

@ohfook

Honestly it's fucking everywhere at the minute. One extra person at the panto won't make much difference. I personally wouldn't do it, but I don't know anyone who has 100% stuck to the rules all of the time.

Also, and correct me if I'm wrong, if the r rate is between one and two, doesn't that mean that most people are roughly only passing it to one or two other people? So it's not like she's be passing it to the whole theatre anyway.

Do you think it actually works exactly like that? One person will only infect one or two others? How do you think you end up with 10-15 people infected at gatherings when one person with covid attended?~Confused
Covidworries · 30/12/2021 23:33

@friendshipsarehardforme

You can not know for sure that OP son will be fine. Statistically likely but thats the thing with covid it has taken out people who on paper should have been fine.

humdingle · 30/12/2021 23:34

[quote Covidworries]@humdingle
I am angry that a poster is defending someone going to a panto while knowing they are covid positive and sayingnthey would do they same rather than disapoint their children.
Risking a room full of people watching a panto and all the people working is out of order.
Admiting you would do this then wishing people healthy new year is dickish at best[/quote]
No, I didn't read into it the same way. When MrsBR said "possibly, depends if my children were looking forward to it" I inferred that she may or may not consider doing a test (and there is no requirement to, remember). I did not automatically assume that she meant she would go out licking people and infecting as many as possible. But then some people like to jump to the worst scenario and are always looking for someone to get angry at.

FriendshipsAreHardForMe · 30/12/2021 23:37

[quote Covidworries]@friendshipsarehardforme

You can not know for sure that OP son will be fine. Statistically likely but thats the thing with covid it has taken out people who on paper should have been fine.[/quote]
When you say Covid, are you referring to the original, Alpha, Delta or Omicron?

Stats are VERY different for all varients of Covid, with Omicron proving by far to be the mildest.

Research has shown the vast majority of hospital admissions in the UK with Omicron are incidental (in hospital for other issues and happen to test positive). Very few are requiring oxygen (again, with other issues).

If he is at risk of serious illness due to cold like symptoms then he shouldn't be in a theatre.

MrsBerthaRochester · 30/12/2021 23:38

No statistics dont lie. They are there in black and white. The amount of healthy kids who have died from covid is minute. Everyone a tragedy but statistically healthy kids are not greatly affected by covid.
Their entire futures are potentially ruined though due to having sacrificed two years of proper education though. Thats tragic.

Covidworries · 30/12/2021 23:39

@humdingle

Oh people have been arseholes to the poor poster defending someone going to a panto knowing their covid postive whatever next... Hmm
It is indefensible for the sil to go to a panto knowing she was covid positive. And anyone defending this behaviour or saying they would do the same are not kind people.

humdingle · 30/12/2021 23:41

@Covidworries have you actually read the same things as me? I think you're jumping to conclusions. But carry on getting your knickers in a twist over someone on the internet, if it helps you.

FriendshipsAreHardForMe · 30/12/2021 23:41

@MrsBerthaRochester

No statistics dont lie. They are there in black and white. The amount of healthy kids who have died from covid is minute. Everyone a tragedy but statistically healthy kids are not greatly affected by covid. Their entire futures are potentially ruined though due to having sacrificed two years of proper education though. Thats tragic.
I agree. People die in all sorts of weird ways. I knew of a man who tripped and was impaled and killed by his own gardening rake. But I wouldn't suggest people stop using rakes as it's HIGHLY unlikely to happen.

Children are extremely unlikely to be harmed by Covid. Even with Delta which is much more severe than Omicron.

It's as if people have stopped researching and are just scaremongering now. The lead virologists are confirming Omicron is mild!

Covidworries · 30/12/2021 23:42

@humdingle that was her responce to the question would she go to the panto if she knew she was covid positive so it wasnt about doing a test or not it was going despite knowing she was positive

MrsBerthaRochester · 30/12/2021 23:42

You may not think Im kind, I would beg to differ but I havent resorted to personal attacks or ancedotes to try and get my view point across. Just saying.

Nanny0gg · 30/12/2021 23:42

[quote anotherannoyngSIL]@Nanny0gg she didn't come to the door when dropping DS so I havent spoken to her. I haven't contacted her as part of me thinks having a go at her will feed her love of drama and she will somehow make herself the victim and me the bad guy in the eyes of MIL etc (especially if she gets ill with it)

Im not sure the best way to play it but for now (tonight!) im not rising to the bait and I will try to go no contact for a while.

I might notify the pantomime venue just in case but assume track and trace do that (if she had it on)

As others have suggested posting lots of pics of things she's missing will be irritating for her (once I'm happy DS hasn't got it)[/quote]
Ah. Hope your DS (and you) stay ok

FriendshipsAreHardForMe · 30/12/2021 23:46

[quote Covidworries]@humdingle

Oh people have been arseholes to the poor poster defending someone going to a panto knowing their covid postive whatever next... Hmm
It is indefensible for the sil to go to a panto knowing she was covid positive. And anyone defending this behaviour or saying they would do the same are not kind people.[/quote]
"...are not kind people".
I've heard it all now 😂

You need to research from reliable sources. It seems you're thinking of the Covid situation last year, not now.

BrotherHelp · 30/12/2021 23:48

@anotherannoyngSIL I would assume she had her covid app deleted and she won’t tell test and trace she was at the pantomime between having the test and a positive result.

Original poster
anotherannoyngSIL · 30/12/2021 23:48

@Nanny0gg Thankyou, hope you stay safe and well too

OP posts:
chaosrabbitland · 30/12/2021 23:49

@MrsBerthaRochester

You may not think Im kind, I would beg to differ but I havent resorted to personal attacks or ancedotes to try and get my view point across. Just saying.
its because they are all so hysterical over covid as apparently its the only thing you can die from nowadays , no one can challenge it , say anything about living with it . anyone that deviates from the narrative is jumped all over , iv been called selfish and all the rest of it when iv said what i think on these covid threads , but then im generally not fussed what people think so it just all washes over me
waitingpatientlyforspring · 30/12/2021 23:51

@Youngatheart00

That’s grossly irresponsible of her - there could be vulnerable people in that theatre which she is directly putting at risk.
My aunty is currently having treatment for cancer. She was due to go to the panto last week but decided against it for this reason. She couldn't trust everyone else going there.
Covidworries · 30/12/2021 23:52

1 in 7 children suffering with long covid.
Omicron may not cause any long covid or it could. Omicron hasnt been around long enough to gather that data.
Mild covid has caused long covid cases during previous varients so mildness doesnt mean that it wont cause long covid.

Obv the hope is that it wont cause any issues but it is isnt possible to say a child or all children in the panto will definately be ok

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