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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel the rift from my family can never mend?

273 replies

YayDay · 27/12/2021 21:05

My sister had her wedding recently. I had been invited, but a few weeks beforehand she sent a text asking me not to attend her big day.

The backstory is that things were going well between us, then over the summer I discovered through social media that she had a Henparty with my other sister (who she's very close to and was maid of honour), half-sister and our sister-in-laws, but had clearly not told me about it, let alone invite me. It came as a shock, I was very upset and felt really betrayed by all my family who knew about it but obviously kept it quiet from me.
My sister's defence was, 'It's my hen party, so suck it up.'

The family jury was split. Some thought, 'well, she's right it's her hen party and maybe she wanted a different dynamic'. Others thought my hurt was reasonable because, 'you're her sister and it would have been respectful to at least have spoken with you rather than doing things behind your back and for you to find out like that.'

The result meant my sister cancelled my wedding invite. She told me by text, rather any discussion or anything.

Photos have gone up on social media. The whole family had a great time. I guess I'm not supposed to be upset and complain about feeling estranged, because it was her big day?

But I just can't get over how rubbish it felt to be left out - again. Being visibly left out and marginalised suggests there's something wrong with me - and I'm not sure how to feel if it's my family who have done this.

I don't actually know how this family rift can actually mend. It just feels like a really big snub that has gone too far...

OP posts:
YayDay · 28/12/2021 05:06

@Pixxie7

I don’t think this situation is as rare as you think, families particularly siblings fall out all the time and unfortunately weddings and funerals tend to be catalyst for these feuds. As a parent it is difficult to stay neutral in these circumstances, as they obviously don’t want to ostracised by either side. It used to be, particularly when the parents were paying that they sent the invitations, but I think that has now changed. In my view your mother should have let you know what was going on, but please don’t fall out with your family over this. This is down to your sister. As pp said baby steps meet with your dad, he has offered an olive branch. I think your sister has acted appallingly but time heals and there will be other family occasions that you want to attend. Of course your upset but don’t let her know getting on with your life is the best revenge.
I think I've learned the hard way that I need to reassess my expectations. If I am invited anywhere by anyone, it's a bonus.

Yeah, dad has offered an olive branch. It's difficult because he's influenced so much from my mum and sister. It's coming back to the issue of a breakdown in trust.

I really need to go to sleep. And, like you said, get on with my life. Maybe this will be a catalyst for me to start anew and a better life too.

OP posts:
LaBellina · 28/12/2021 05:07

OP, Reading your posts, the toxic triangle between you and your mother and your sister really reminds me of the relationship I have with my mother and sister and I totally believe you when you say this came out of nowhere without a backstory of you having done something wrong prior to the hen party.
Has your sister been jealous of you all your life and was she your mother’s Golden Child and you the scapegoat? That would explain your mother’s active role in trying to gaslight you to believe you choose to be excluded and defending your sisters cruel behavior.

PrincessNutella · 28/12/2021 05:27

I hate to be the party pooper here. But even though I am unfortunately well-acquainted with the aggravations with disability, plus I find the idea of going to a hen party abhorrent, I still think the sister might possibly have a case for not inviting her sister to her hen do. Maybe she wanted to do something vigorous and physical, either something athletic or a pub crawl. And if every family gathering is rearranged for your comfort because of your disability, might she not feel that she has a right to have HER hen do about her?

Scarydinosaurs · 28/12/2021 06:04

@grapewine yes, seriously. Particularly when disabilities have happened as adults, even family members can be incredibly dismissive and minimise the impact it has over the person’s life.

Given what the OP has described, it sounds very likely this is her family dynamic.

grapewine · 28/12/2021 06:10

[quote Scarydinosaurs]@grapewine yes, seriously. Particularly when disabilities have happened as adults, even family members can be incredibly dismissive and minimise the impact it has over the person’s life.

Given what the OP has described, it sounds very likely this is her family dynamic.[/quote]
I agree. I apologise for reading your comment wrong. I read it as you saying OP played up her disability. That's the opposite of this comment, and I went back to reread. I'm sorry.

Scarydinosaurs · 28/12/2021 06:27

@grapewine no problem at all!

ChubbyMorticia · 28/12/2021 07:10

What you consider ‘consulting the family jury’… I’m betting your sister sees as gossiping and stirring up trouble.

Should someone in your family have checked in on you? On your sister’s wedding day? I’m thinking they were a bit busy and focused on attending a wedding. I’m really not trying to be unkind, but I think your expectations are unreasonable.

Was everything done fairly? I don’t know. I suspect if someone was calling extended family members to complain about my decisions, I’d not be terribly keen on them attending my wedding either. What else are they going to be calling everyone about next?

I’m not saying that was your intention but I can certainly see where your sister may have taken the whole family jury thing as an attempt to bully her.

Should she have talked to you about the hen do? I don’t know. Would you have been able to hear her out and accept her reasons with grace, or argued to change her mind? Called the family jury for a judgement? If it would’ve resulted in a flurry of calls and upset prior, I can see why she’d rather avoid it.

I’m not sure either of you handled things well, honestly. And I find the idea of a family jury to be extremely off putting.

notanothertakeaway · 28/12/2021 07:23

I'd be interested to hear your sister's side of this story

It's awful when people are excluded due to poor health, but I gave a feeling there's more to this story

MichelleScarn · 28/12/2021 07:28

Oh the Family Jury was just canvassing what others in our family thought so I could to get advice on what to do and how I should react to the situation - was I being reasonable and what I should do. However, I think my sister may have interpreted me sharing what happened with the hen party as stirring, because "it's her hen party" and "her wedding", so what other family members think/thought didn't actually count.

Well it was 'her wedding/hen party'? How many people did you canvass as party of your jury and what exactly did you say to them?

NdujaWannaDance · 28/12/2021 08:10

Wow. Such a lot to unpack here. I agree on the face of it the whole family sound cruel and unreasonable, and the Bridezilla in particular.

However, I can't help but wonder what the other side of this story looks like, for context. If a person's behaviour (let alone a whole group of people) seems so outrageously unreasonable as to barely be believable, then more questions need to be asked.

Nothing is ever black and white in family dynamics, and I’m guessing there’s a backstory to your backstory and a backstory to your sister’s treatment of you, and in the end no one can remember how it started, but the end result is you don’t like each other and that’s it, end of story.

This is my hunch. If it was just the bride excluding her sister then it would be more straightforward, but the whole family including the OP's mother colluding in it seems odd.

It might just be that they are an unpleasant bunch of people who all dance to the sister's tune, and the OP is the family scapegoat. But without knowing for sure that's the case, just saying 'There there, fuck 'em, they are all a bunch of bitches' and giving the OP a pat on the head isn't actually that helpful. At worst it might be reinforcing some inaccuate beliefs that the OP might have, instead of helping her understand why this has happened.

YayDay without interrogating you about the specifics of your disability and how your PTSD manifests itself, it's difficult for us to guess at what might be going on here. Either way it looks like it's been clumsily and insensitively handled by the family.

My mum claimed that my disability would have meant I couldn't take part in the hen party activities ...and I would have had to sit on the sidelines, which she said would likely have upset me as it would remind me of my active life before disability.

This may well be true. A kind and loving sister dealing with a reasonable and rational disabled sister would either pick an activity that didn't preclude her from participating, or at least she'd have talked it through with her first and given her the option to choose whether to sit on the sidelines, or to simply not attend.

The question is, did she not do that because she's a selfish cow? Or because there was a real concern that regardless of what type of hen night she planned, it would always be highly problematic for the disabled sister to attend, for reasons we don't know?

Maybe she couldn't bring herself to be honest with you Yay because it's understandably a very difficult conversation to have and she knew you'd be either hurt or very angry.

I had a big birthday party where I had a real dilemma over inviting a friend and her DH because she's lovely but he's is an arse who is loud, obnoxious and too boisterous. With too many drinks in him he makes me uncomfortable and anxious and I am on high alert for it all to kick off. Luckily I was able to get around it because I realised that my birthday clashed with the date of an annual event they always go to, and would prioritise over my party.

It was a relief, and easier than having to tell my friend that she could come but her DH couldn't, or that they were both invited but she had to keep him muzzled and tell him in advance not to act like a twat. I suspect she knows how I feel about him, but to spare her feelings I've never mentioned it to her directly..

Sometimes it's really difficult to know how to navigate these things and people often take the non-confrontational cowards way out.

I mean this gently YayDay but is there a reason your attendence might have made things potentially stressful for others? For example, does your PTSD mean you have terrible panic attacks or major meltdowns in loud/crowded places, so that your mum or another sister would have to leave the party to take you home?

I have been reflecting on why I wanted consultation. Since becoming disabled I have noticed that it has impacted my inclusivity in general. I wanted to stress inclusivity to my sister (and family), but that backfired because, like you say, they have no obligations to be inclusive - and maybe they resent having to accommodate someone who has special needs now. I appreciate it's not easy and takes its toll.

That sounds awful and very difficult for you. Without knowing more about the nature of your issues it's hard to comment on whether they could reasonably be more inclusive or not, without having to compromise too much on what they would like to do.

Your sister strikes me as a Bridezilla with a "vision" of her perfect Instagram worthy day. And anyone with something visibly different would have wrecked her perfect pictures. Like those Bridezillas who demand people dye their hair or lose weight or cover their tattoos because it ruins their aesthetic.

I thought this too. I don't think anyone would be so fucking awful as to exclude their sister or friend just because their legs didn't work and they used a wheelchair for example, if they were otherwise well behaved and low maintenance. Some things are admittedly more easily accommodated than others.

But if, let's say, their disability was very poorly controlled alcoholism, or a combination of being so morbidly obese that even leaving the house and travelling anywhere in a normal vehicle is a challenge. Coupled with poorly controlled MH issues? Behavioural problems? Suddenly a simple night out can become fraught with so many potential issues that it's easier to understand why others might wish to avoid it. It's still an awful shame for the person excluded but it's perhaps more understandable.

For example if it was in a lively pub/nightclub the family may have felt they were, in their way, protecting such a person from the possibility of there being 'a bit of a scene' or from being abused and made fun of by a bunch drunken idiots. These things are complicated and it would be very hard to be honest with someone about why you felt it safer/kinder /easier all-round to leave them out.

I'm not saying that any of this was the case with the OP, just that this sort of thing might be going on.

Even if my sister was right to cancel my invite in the name of 'preventing arguments or drama', then why did no one in my family check on my welfare that wedding day while they had a party? I was feeling very low, isolated, neglected, unloved and uncared for too.

YayDa you say you got very upset on the phone when you confronted your sister about leaving you out of the hen party. Did you actually become very angry and abusive? Do you think your family would say that you have a history of reacting with excessive 'drama' when things upset you?

Apologies if I am barking up the wrong tree with all of the above, but as i said, with scant detail to go on about why they ALL might have colluded in excluding you from the hen party, and then not being more on your side when your sister retracted your invitation to the wedding, it's not unreasonable to look for some sort of explanation for it that makes sense.

Fairylights25 · 28/12/2021 08:17

You have been treated appallingly by your mother and sisters. Your father I am unsure about his part in this, it looks like he was trying to do the right thing.

Op I think you need to face this head on, they choose to leave you out of the hen party because your disability prevented you from joining in and additionally they created an unreasonable drama as an excuse to withdraw the wedding invite - your sister was looking for any reason is my guess and tried to make you look unreasonable about the hen party.

Not only is this highly manipulative and cruel behaviour but it is extremely discriminatory.

If my sister had a condition like yours I would have chosen an activity she could enjoy and made it a priority so she could attend. The wedding would be adapted if need be to accommodate her, because I love and care for her.

What is glaringly obvious from your posts is the total lack of care and consideration any of your family have for you. Yes it would be a dealbreaker for me, and unforgivable to most people. This is not okay, and would never be okay in normal families.

Do you have a dp or children of your own? Now is the moment to look at their cruelty and choose a better life for yourself. Get some counselling organised now, self care is the way forward and decide enough is enough. There may be some relatives worth keeping, if they have been supportive and kind to you in the past, but I would be cutting them all off now. In your position I would delete their numbers, block their calls and let them fall off the face of the earth. Anyone that can do that to someone that is supposed to be loved and cared for and has what sounds to me like moderately severe disabilities is not worth another moment of your precious time.

Get some support, let them go, move on and come off social media. It is finally time to look after you.

anon12345678901 · 28/12/2021 08:19

It is extremely poor form not to invite a sister and for no one to text you the day of the wedding. However, the hen party is for her, maybe she wanted to do things you couldn't have done, maybe it was arranged for her. I didn't see an answer to these but I may have missed it. Apologies if I have.
She was right to say it was her hen do, to keep it a secret not so much. Although it sounds like the catalyst was really you asking other family members for their opinions. This was between you and your sister, there is no need to involve other family members and I bet it pissed her off.

ANameChangeAgain · 28/12/2021 08:48

Reading your first couple of posts reminded me a little of my own sister's wedding. I was heavily pregnant, so couldn't join in with the usual jovilities and had to watch from the sidelines. It hurt a little, but was I knew the exclusions weren't deliberate, and I got to have a nice meal with the hens before they went off and enjoyed their wild night. If my sister and family had kept me in the dark completely I would have been devastated. I think you reacted the way you did because you were hurt and humiliated, you already have a lot to cope with, and this just twisted the knife. Your family didn't do this to you, it was your sister being thoughtless, all your family did was respect, rightly or wrongly, your sister's crappy decision. The fall out now is probably because everyone is embarrassed about how you were treated. Hold your head up @YayDay, this can be repaired with the wider family at least.

beastlyslumber · 28/12/2021 08:49

It's so interesting when people defend mistreatment by family towards the family scapegoat. It really reflects how powerless and humiliated the scapegoat is, because not only is it considered fine and normal within the family, but it is also supported by many people outside the family. Their reaction to the existence of a scapegoat is to suppose the scapegoat must deserve their mistreatment in some way. Because 'normal' families love each other, so if there isn't love towards one person in a family, it must be that person's fault, right? Can't be that the family is wrong, because families are good.

So scapegoats, especially as children, are constantly traumatised by their family, and when they seek support in the rest of the world, they are re-traumatised by others who are instinctively drawn to the abusive position in family dynamics.

It must be very threatening for some people to confront the idea that families can be unloving, cruel, discriminatory, shaming, hurtful, and worse. Maybe their own family was very good at maintaining a superficial appearance of being loving and wonderful, and anything that deviated from that was a source of shame and blame for the victim. If you were punished or threatened with punishment for noticing bad behaviour within your own family, you are probably quite highly motivated not to see it in other people's families.

OP I think that you have been badly treated by your family and I would be very surprised if you don't have C-PTSD from your experiences of family trauma, let alone your injury and disability. You may not have been perfect or behaved ideally, either (no one is perfect and traumatised people do not always handle situations well), but being left out of your sister's celebrations in the way you were is extremely cruel. I would focus on your own healing and go low contact with people in your family while you do so.

In future, my suggestion would be to post in relationships and not on aibu, as you get some very unimaginative and inexperienced people commenting on here.

Suspiciousmind20 · 28/12/2021 08:51

Morning OP.

Today is a new day.

I don’t think it’s hopeless at all. I work with families that have mended rifts and have seen a huge, ugly rift mended in DHs family.

If you can all talk about it well you can get through this. If you feel strong enough to cope with the come back of the advice below you could try it. No one would blame you for going low/no contact though, this is pretty awful.

If you can own and apologise for anything that you did this time or in the past, that will help to allow others to do the same. I’m not saying you did anything wrong but we all behave unreasonably sometimes, especially when hurt, so I’m guessing you might be able to think of something. It opens the door for others to own their own mistakes too.

I think the most hurtful thing, from what you have written, is that you spent time with them and they all hid the hen party. That is so hurtful. That on its own is enough to destroy trust. You hurt is completely valid. But if you can, try and figure out what their intentions might have been. Why do you think they did this? Was it to spare your feelings? Was it to placate a very stressed bride? Is she someone who is scary to stand up to? Was it to deliberately hurt you? Avoid you getting angry/horrible? There may be other possible reasons I can’t think of.

What they should have done, of course, was to discuss it with you. Ask how you would feel about the activities and if you’d rather sit out. Or let you know that on this occasion she would rather you weren’t there (not a great reflection on her if that was the case). Both are very difficult conversations to have with anyone. They have been cowards. How would you have reacted? How do you think they would think you would react? We’re they worried you would kick off if they talked to you about it? That might shed some light on why, or not. Not excuses. Doesn’t make it ok. But it might help if you understand a bit more.

Do they understand PTSD and your disability? It can be hard for others to get it. It’s not your responsibility to educate them about inclusivity but if they have never been challenged on it and educated about it then that might help you to understand their behaviour and for it to not feel so personal. Again, I’m not excusing them and nor should you. We are still holding them accountable. Just making sense of it all.

I wonder if, once the dust has settled, you could consider writing an open letter to them all stating:

1 - why you care about them and what you appreciate about them.

2 - that you would like to mend the rift and why. Highlight and apologise for anything you did that played a part if there was anything.

3 - what felt hurtful (use ‘I’ statements and avoid blaming language) and if you can understand why they did what they did then share these as hypotheses rather than facts. ‘I wonder if you were trying to spare my feelings’ for example.

5 - explain a bit about how your disability effects you and how their behaviour has mirrored that and, more importantly, how the broken trust has left you feeling.

  1. - Explain how you would like them to navigate things like this in the future. For example tell them if you are happy for them to talk about it openly and if you are happy to talk about whether a family activity fits for you etc. Explain the changes you will try and make around your part - if there is anything.

Send it to the whole family and finish by letting them know that you would love to hear from them. Explain that there will be no drama but you may be upset. It’s fine for them to be upset too. Let them know they matter to you.

When you speak to them avoid blaming language and stick to ‘I’ statements.

This is what I would do in your situation- with my family - if I wanted to mend things. You need to judge it with your family as it could make it worse. In a family that don’t talk about difficult emotions etc the one trying to can be shunned. But then is that any worse than now? Only you can know.

If you decide to just distance yourself that would be completely understandable too. Some families prefer to sweep it all under the carpet and pretend it never happened. But it’s never too late to change that habit - You’ll know your family best.

Hope you can talk to your friends today. Friends can often be life’s compensation for family. Grin If you do send a letter get a trusted friend to read it too to take out any unhelpful/emotionally charged language. Take your time over it. The beauty of writing a letter/email etc is you can be very careful with language in a way that is much harder to do when you talk. It would give you a better chance of being heard properly.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do.Flowers

MintyChops · 28/12/2021 08:52

It’s the secrecy, the deliberately not telling you that would hurt me the most. Just so nasty. I’m sorry this has happened OP, you must feel so left out.

Suspiciousmind20 · 28/12/2021 08:59

Also - you might want to try writing (but not sending) the letter that you’d really like to send - calling them all names under the sun to get it out. Just don’t send that one and destroy it.

Fairylights25 · 28/12/2021 09:04

I don't often/ever challenge kind and well intentioned posts, but honestly I could not stay quiet on this one. Why must op apologise? Why on earth should she be the one to approach them? Surely the apologies are owed to her more than anyone else suspiciousmind20 I find your post baffling given what has happened, and a gas lighting.

Your suggestions below:

1 - why you care about them and what you appreciate about them.

Why should op ever choose to do this, given what they have done to her? Where is their appreciation and care of her feelings?

2 - that you would like to mend the rift and why. Highlight and apologise for anything you did that played a part if there was anything.
Why would op even want to mend a rift after what has happened. How does she benefit from spending time with a family that care so little for her?

3 - what felt hurtful (use ‘I’ statements and avoid blaming language) and if you can understand why they did what they did then share these as hypotheses rather than facts. ‘I wonder if you were trying to spare my feelings’ for example.

They were not trying to spare her feelings, they were finding an excuse to withdraw her invitation. The collusion of her mother and siblings was pretty unforgivable, dressed up as 'respecting the bride's wishes'. Changing language does not alter the fact they behaved with utter cruelty.

5 - explain a bit about how your disability effects you and how their behaviour has mirrored that and, more importantly, how the broken trust has left you feeling.

Do you not think they should be aware of her disability? Given it is not recent? Surely they must already know given they are her parents and siblings.

  1. - Explain how you would like them to navigate things like this in the future. For example tell them if you are happy for them to talk about it openly and if you are happy to talk about whether a family activity fits for you etc. Explain the changes you will try and make around your part - if there is anything.

They do not care about how this 'fits' or they would never have chosen to hurt her like this, why on earth would they start to care now how to change to accommodate op? They had ample opportunities to do this at the hen party and wedding and choose not to. Do you seriously think they are interested in helping or changing anything?

I find the post so naive, because you have totally ignored the fact that a deliberate decision was made by op's sister, and backed up by her mother and others to completely isolate op and leave her out of one of the biggest family celebrations they will ever have. Why, according to your post this is now on op to fix is beyond me!

The family are simply not worth having, they are not worth the pain and damage they cause, I would respectfully suggest that op finds her dignity and self esteem which must now be rock bottom and chooses something better for her future.

TheRealHousewife · 28/12/2021 09:05

@beastlyslumber

It's so interesting when people defend mistreatment by family towards the family scapegoat. It really reflects how powerless and humiliated the scapegoat is, because not only is it considered fine and normal within the family, but it is also supported by many people outside the family. Their reaction to the existence of a scapegoat is to suppose the scapegoat must deserve their mistreatment in some way. Because 'normal' families love each other, so if there isn't love towards one person in a family, it must be that person's fault, right? Can't be that the family is wrong, because families are good.

So scapegoats, especially as children, are constantly traumatised by their family, and when they seek support in the rest of the world, they are re-traumatised by others who are instinctively drawn to the abusive position in family dynamics.

It must be very threatening for some people to confront the idea that families can be unloving, cruel, discriminatory, shaming, hurtful, and worse. Maybe their own family was very good at maintaining a superficial appearance of being loving and wonderful, and anything that deviated from that was a source of shame and blame for the victim. If you were punished or threatened with punishment for noticing bad behaviour within your own family, you are probably quite highly motivated not to see it in other people's families.

OP I think that you have been badly treated by your family and I would be very surprised if you don't have C-PTSD from your experiences of family trauma, let alone your injury and disability. You may not have been perfect or behaved ideally, either (no one is perfect and traumatised people do not always handle situations well), but being left out of your sister's celebrations in the way you were is extremely cruel. I would focus on your own healing and go low contact with people in your family while you do so.

In future, my suggestion would be to post in relationships and not on aibu, as you get some very unimaginative and inexperienced people commenting on here.

I absolutely totally agree with @beastlyslumber opinion on @YayDay post. I can really identify with Yay and I feel the upmost compassion for her. Do what you need to, to protect and look after yourself Yay Flowers. Take care.
MichelleScarn · 28/12/2021 09:12

@beastlyslumber

It's so interesting when people defend mistreatment by family towards the family scapegoat. It really reflects how powerless and humiliated the scapegoat is, because not only is it considered fine and normal within the family, but it is also supported by many people outside the family. Their reaction to the existence of a scapegoat is to suppose the scapegoat must deserve their mistreatment in some way. Because 'normal' families love each other, so if there isn't love towards one person in a family, it must be that person's fault, right? Can't be that the family is wrong, because families are good.

So scapegoats, especially as children, are constantly traumatised by their family, and when they seek support in the rest of the world, they are re-traumatised by others who are instinctively drawn to the abusive position in family dynamics.

It must be very threatening for some people to confront the idea that families can be unloving, cruel, discriminatory, shaming, hurtful, and worse. Maybe their own family was very good at maintaining a superficial appearance of being loving and wonderful, and anything that deviated from that was a source of shame and blame for the victim. If you were punished or threatened with punishment for noticing bad behaviour within your own family, you are probably quite highly motivated not to see it in other people's families.

OP I think that you have been badly treated by your family and I would be very surprised if you don't have C-PTSD from your experiences of family trauma, let alone your injury and disability. You may not have been perfect or behaved ideally, either (no one is perfect and traumatised people do not always handle situations well), but being left out of your sister's celebrations in the way you were is extremely cruel. I would focus on your own healing and go low contact with people in your family while you do so.

In future, my suggestion would be to post in relationships and not on aibu, as you get some very unimaginative and inexperienced people commenting on here.

@beautyslumber are you directing that post at those on this thread who are suggesting there are different opinions and 'sides' to this situation, as most threads have? So because posters aren't saying 'yes yes op they are all absolutely unequivocally horrific' these posters are 'threatened/unimaginative/inexperienced'?
Absolutely agree it's very sad and upsetting for op to have been left out of hen and disinvited from the wedding, but you're now stating that she has complex PTSD related to it. Are you a Psychiatrist?
ChristmasPlanning · 28/12/2021 09:14

No advice but I think your family sound very unkind. Pleased you gave great friends.

You were right not to attend on the sissy invited by your Dad, that would have made things worse. He should have acted before then, so bizarre to think he could just invite you & others on the day

Hollywolly1 · 28/12/2021 09:27

To not include you because of your disability like wtf is that about...people with all sorts of disabilities can do almost anything these days,like what is wrong with them. It seems to me they used your disability as an excuse and what sort of person does that and to rescind the wedding invite to tut tut.I am not shocked at you feeling so hurt that's very normal. If I was one of the other siblings and to you being treated like that I would be absolutely devastated

jacks11 · 28/12/2021 09:31

I don’t think you had a right to attend/be consulted about the hen-do, especially as it was something that your disability prevented you from taking part in, but she should have had the decency to say they were doing x, which they knew you couldn’t do, rather than hiding it from you and letting you find out “by accident”. I think it entirely reasonable to be upset that they were not upfront about it. I also think that it sounds like your sister completely over-reacted to your raising the issue by uninviting you- unless you were abusive towards her or something, which it doesn’t sound like you were. It seems a very OTT reaction if the relationship was otherwise good. I’m not surprised you’ve been left reeling. Maybe best to speak to your Dad about it, if you want to look at trying to move past it/reconcile/get an apology or whatever. Or you might be better off accepting that you can’t change them, so it is best to keep your distance and concentrate on friends/other family members.

My only word of caution, if that is the right word, is regards to having the right to “being consulted” about someone else’s celebrations/ plans/ event. I’m not sure that’s entirely fair- it’s not really up to you to decide if something should be altered to suit you if the organiser does not want that. Sometimes, you have to accept that plans don’t suit your needs/abilities and changing things to be inclusive of you will not fit in with the planned event. I have a relative who tended, until recently, to ruin a certain family event by insisting she was invited/included in activities she could not manage participate in due to a several conditions she has- not only that, nor does she enjoy most of these things in any way, shape or form. She will mope/get upset as she feels excluded or lonely or bored/someone will feel compelled to sit it out so she’s not on her own etc. This put others on edge, meant nobody could really enjoy things, others felt pressurised/guilted into missing out to keep her company and generally less enjoyable for others in order to include her. It was a bit rubbish all round- she was on the “look out’ for evidence of being excluded, did not enjoy most of it either and everyone else wished she’d just admit that she didn’t enjoy it and was a bit resentful that her needs/wants impacted significantly on the enjoyment of others.

On a few occasions we put it to her that she probably wouldn’t manage- and that we can all do something else at a different time (we do things that she can join in with and does enjoy too, it’s not like she is always left out)- she got pretty angry/upset and insisted on coming or try to suggest ways that would make it more to her liking or abilities (or sometimes both) but was not what anyone else wanted. So, there was a compromise of some sort each time and she came, but as usual did not enjoy herself 95% of the time, moped about and put a bit of a dampener on things for everyone else. A few years ago there was a falling out because she had been particularly miserable and someone said something along the lines of “why do you insist on coming if you hate it so much?’ which upset her, understandably, as she felt unwelcome- but was the consequence of insisting on coming to something not suited to her needs AND that she did not enjoy. It might have been ok if she’s enjoyed the bits she could do/found other things to do whilst others did what they enjoyed, but that was not the case. The result was the next year it was booked and then she was told that we’d booked without her as she obviously does not enjoy it and is clearly miserable, which spoiled things a bit for everyone. She was livid/upset, because she felt it should be her choice, which was inevitable I suppose, but just could not see she wasn’t invited to this one thing- but to every other family event- because her lack of enjoyment impacted on everyone else. She is still not speaking to most of us, which is a shame, bit I hope she will come round eventually. I’m quite sure that if she posted something on MN that she’d portray it as her family not caring/consulting her, leaving her out of something she enjoyed being part of etc, which is not true at all. I acknowledge that she was hurt and upset, but equally she was causing upset to others too.

UserBot99 · 28/12/2021 09:34

I recognise so much of my own family estrangement in this. I see parallels between your position and my own. You tried to shift an unhealthy dynamic and you got nowhere. You got ''worse than nowhere''.

Because in order to be a part of your family, you must uphold the dynamics that erase you and invalidate you. That is the cost of being a member of your family.

This was very painful for me, but I'm nearly two years to the date where I had the painful shock of my life (realising how defensive, emotionally rigid and lacking self-awareness my parents really are) but in that time although it's been painful and it's hit me in massive waves at times, I feel stronger for it now. So my advice would be, don't do what I did, don't try to make them see. They will never ever see. They will never, ever reflect.

All you can do is work on that part of yourself that doesn't need their good opinion. I know that's brutal to type. Everybody needs (and is hardwired) to want their family to think well of them. But inwardly work on diminishing that need in you while outwardly talking about the weather or the garden when they make contact. But don't seek it out.

I wish that's what I'd done. I tried to shift a family dynamic because I am the scapegoat. I am the trash can. They do seem to need to hurt me to be 'ok' and I thought to myself ''they're not monsters, they're not unintelligent, they can understand this''. But I was so wrong. They tell me they love me while stonewalling me because their position is and always will be ''respect our right to disrespect you'' so I was pushing water uphill trying to get them to see

I wish I'd just faded a bit. Said nothing.

Hopefully you will feel stronger at the end of this. I am not saying it's been an easy two years but I no longer need my parents' approval or blessing or good opinion. I look at them now and I see self-righteous toddlers in pearls and good coats, like in bugsy malone. My brother sees everything through their lens. So I've backed away from him too.

But they all need each other and it turns out I'm ok without them.

xxx

beastlyslumber · 28/12/2021 09:43

Because in order to be a part of your family, you must uphold the dynamics that erase you and invalidate you. That is the cost of being a member of your family.

This hit home.

I was/am the scapegoat also. I have nothing but empathy for all of us who were mistreated by our families. It's right that the only way forward is to work on your own healing and forget about trying to change the family dynamic, because you will only end up more hurt and traumatised.

And to answer a question from a pp, yes, childhood trauma does cause C-PTSD, and is almost certainly a factor for OP, as it will be for anyone who was the scapegoat in their family.