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AIBU?

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Original poster

Is this present having a dig at me

299 replies

Welshlavalove · 26/12/2021 09:52

Don’t really see partners mum since covid as lives a couple of hours away and she never travels . Previously it was small talk every few months . She came for Christmas lunch and this was my present . Aibu in thinking she is far shaming me ? When ever she sees her slightly overweight son she makes comments about how he looks pregnant . I used to run a lot don’t now .

Is this present having a dig at me
OP posts:
Hamjamwich · 26/12/2021 13:45

Really crap present

Jemmozlfc · 26/12/2021 13:50

If anyone, let alone my MIL, gave me that, they'd be leaving with a black eye! Why do you women put up with these bitchy old hags?!

WonderfulYou · 26/12/2021 13:59

Are you overweight?

I think you are being sensitive.
My friend received a similar one and thought it was hilarious - but she’s not overweight.

Shallwegoforawalk · 26/12/2021 14:03

@LAMPS1

In front her, I would have taken a pair of nail scissors and exaggeratedly and carefully unpicked the slogan from the actual cushion without a word and put the offensive bit on the fire or in the bin or even in her hand bag to take home with her. Then I would have turned to her and politely thanked her for the cushion. If she said anything at all I would have said ….I appreciate the cushion thank you very much but not the message which, before you argue that I don’t have a sense of humour, isn’t the slightest bit funny and which is offensive and ignorant. Job done.

Of course you would. Hmm

Thwackit · 26/12/2021 14:03

You aren’t close enough for her to buy you this knowing you’d definitely find it funny. Most people on here don’t find it funny. It’s a hideous, rude, awful gift.

DrManhattan · 26/12/2021 14:06

What did you say? Thanks and Merry Christmas you horrible old slag.

LazySundayPlease · 26/12/2021 14:06

I would usually say to people to take gifts in food humour but this is awful.

I actually think wrapping it and regifting it for her birthday is entirely appropriate in the situation. Tell her it was so funny, you wanted her to feel the same joy you did when you unwrapped it!

Nanny0gg · 26/12/2021 14:11

@WonderfulYou

Are you overweight?

I think you are being sensitive.
My friend received a similar one and thought it was hilarious - but she’s not overweight.

#bekind clearly passed you by
HunterGatherer · 26/12/2021 14:11

How spiteful.
You need Michelle Obamas, "when they go low, you go high".
At my kindest i'd say, "Thanks for the thought but it's not my cup of tea, can I have the receipt please send I will change it?" But in reality I'd be more likely to scowl and say "what the hell".

PodgyMcPodgerson · 26/12/2021 14:19

@WonderfulYou
🙄

tapeandglue · 26/12/2021 14:26

Well, it's a fat joke about someone who doesn't run anymore.

If you're always making these kind of fat jokes about yourself, it would be acceptable.

If she's really fat and you're really fat, and you both find that hilarious, it would be acceptable.

If you're really skinny, it would be a bit odd, but again, not offensive.

There are very limited circumstances where you can buy something like this for someone else without them understandably taking offence.

If you're normal sized and used to be really skinny, then it's an exceptionally mean present, especially if you liked running, but gave up running due to injury and can't run anymore.

Very poorly thought out.

Spudina · 26/12/2021 14:30

Nasty. I’m seething in your behalf.

Annike4 · 26/12/2021 14:38

I wouldn't mind someone having a friendly dig at me because I'm plump, but that cushion slogan just is not funny - it's horrible.
I would get rid of the thing - I wouldn't even give it away as it would make no-one happy!

SocksAndTheCity · 26/12/2021 14:43

@WonderfulYou

Are you overweight?

I think you are being sensitive.
My friend received a similar one and thought it was hilarious - but she’s not overweight.

I'm not overweight and I still think it's thoroughly cunty.
mumwon · 26/12/2021 14:52

Oh I wouldn't re-gift it to her - give it to charity.
& start hunting for even more nasty & apt funny insult presents to give to her. You have a year to look & mn to advise

Original poster
Welshlavalove · 26/12/2021 15:45

I am overweight, I did use to run a lot but stopped a few years ago , put cushion in bin , don’t think I will see her for awhile as can’t be bothered . She also never asks my children who live with us . So why should I even bother she’s just rude 🙄

OP posts:
AmyDudley · 26/12/2021 15:54

It obviously nasty (and not remotely funny) but I wouldn't waste any time and effort getting into a sort of 'offensively sloganed cushion' war with her, that giving her far more attention than she deserved.

My eldest sister (with whom I am now NC) used to go in for weaponised gift giving (a pair of trousers she bought that were too big so she thought they would fit me (I was smaller than her) a box full of old toy guns for my DS's birthday because she knew I didn;t want him to play with guns, a note saying 'meant to ask Andy (her DH) to pick you up something at duty free but we both forgot about you). Anyway - you get the drift after a particularly stupid year when all my childrens presents had been 'accidently opened and broken by her kids but she sent them anyway' I said to her 'lets not do presents any more' and I stopped and have been free of her nonsense ever since. If you don;t join in the game they don't get any fun out of it. Seriously she's a waste of space don't give her any of yours. Bin the cushion and bin her.

LittleRoundRobin · 26/12/2021 16:01

@WonderfulYou

Are you overweight?

I think you are being sensitive.
My friend received a similar one and thought it was hilarious - but she’s not overweight.

Hmm
dustandfluf · 26/12/2021 18:22

@WonderfulYou

Are you overweight?

I think you are being sensitive.
My friend received a similar one and thought it was hilarious - but she’s not overweight.

You friend has a crap sense of humour if she finds this kind of thing funny.
plinkplinkfizzer · 26/12/2021 18:26

That is pretty shocking , not even something that could be taken with good humour . I would be really hurt to receive that .

thenovice · 27/12/2021 17:24

"Dear MIL, I was a bit confused by your present. Were you trying to send me a message, or did you not think how this could come across? As Christmas is the season for goodwill, I can't believe you wanted to hurt me."

Plumbuddle · 27/12/2021 17:25

@Welshlavalove

I am overweight, I did use to run a lot but stopped a few years ago , put cushion in bin , don’t think I will see her for awhile as can’t be bothered . She also never asks my children who live with us . So why should I even bother she’s just rude 🙄
Sorry haven't RTFT as wanted to know how OP felt about answers before adding my bit. Not only is this disgraceful and bitchy as other posters said on the first page, but it is weirdly sexual in its commentary about a DIL. Don't let her near your children unsupervised. Horrible woman.
dinkdink · 27/12/2021 17:27

Wow definitely give her a gift like that, could you wait till b’day might taste all the sweeter😁

Moll2020 · 27/12/2021 17:31

My mum is 80 and would buy something like this for a relative/friend if it made her laugh. She buys her adult grandchildren totally inappropriate things if she thinks they are funny. She came to me for Christmas and turned up with gin jelly shots to shot with her grandchildren because she’s always wanted to try them!!

LadyCampanulaTottington · 27/12/2021 17:35

Remember when people weren’t so easily offended and things were funny?

Maybe next year someone will give you a sense of humour.