Is this present having a dig at me

[Welshlavalove]

Don’t really see partners mum since covid as lives a couple of hours away and she never travels . Previously it was small talk every few months . She came for Christmas lunch and this was my present . Aibu in thinking she is far shaming me ? When ever she sees her slightly overweight son she makes comments about how he looks pregnant . I used to run a lot don’t now .

[AWOL66]

@AWOL66

Unless you have lots of similarly sloganed stuff everywhere I would take it as at best arrogantly insensitive or at worst deliberately rude but don't be personally offended. She must be like that with everyone. I was given a grow your own boyfriend doll when young by a "friend" which I didn't know how to take and she turned out to be one of the most vile people you could ever imagine

Further to my comment thinking about it more I would say though members of my family have made jokes to men in the family looking pregnant e.g "when's the baby due" and it really was just banter and not an insult. I would keep an open mind to her intentions with the gift especially if you're slim (so less likely to take it personally) as some people do have this absent minded humour or not have a clue with gifts but I'd still see it as a red flag to note down just in case she is a nightmare MIL

[AWOL66]

Unless you have lots of similarly sloganed stuff everywhere I would take it as at best arrogantly insensitive or at worst deliberately rude but don't be personally offended. She must be like that with everyone. I was given a grow your own boyfriend doll when young by a "friend" which I didn't know how to take and she turned out to be one of the most vile people you could ever imagine

[FairytaleOfLancashire]

She's a cunt.
It's definitely her, not you.

[PainterMummy]

Next reason you have to give her a gift, give her done thing like this. Then follow up with similarly themed mug, then maybe a t shirt. Always with something with a written message to be kind.

[Stellf]

Mils are really good at putting down their Sons partners. What a bitch!

[MLJT]

Should actually mention that one christmas my MIL got me a pair of novelty 'clown' slippers that curled up at the toe (I have size 8 feet for a woman - although I don't consider that out the norm as a tall woman). She said they are just a bit of fun - they went to a charity shop. And this year one of my presents from my BIL was a pair of car air freshners!!! What is wrong with people?

[Chandimum]

@DialSquare

Get her this for her Birthday.

Perfect!

[Swissgirl70]

Just plain bitchy. I would find it very difficult to come back from that

[Welshlavalove]

Nothing like reading how I should get off my fat backside in the daily Mail .

[Mumkins42]

She may be making a dig as she feels neglect and left out or she may just think it is funny and be generally insensitivity to how that would be received. All that matters is that for whatever reason you feel uncomfortable. Perhaps just don't respond, don't communicate as if you would a child doing something you want to discourage. When she next gets in touch I wonder how she'd feel if one of you said to her in a non confrontational way that it felt like a criticism or judgement in our weight? Was that the intention? And see what she says.

[Welshlavalove]

Does the daily Mail not have enough news without looking at mumsnet .

[Perdy45]

Heads up, this thread has been picked up by the Daily Mail this morning...

Woman claims her mother-in-law fat-shamed her with Christmas gift
mol.im/a/10350137
via dailym.ai/ios

[Justilou1]

Serve her dinner, snacks, etc on it like a pageboy. Or find others with rude MIL comments.

[Sedai]

My BiL and I have a close relationship and will have silly banter with each other and if he got me that I'd laugh, but for your MiL who you never see to get you it, it is strange and bitchy

[AmaiaAlissa]

I’d throw the stupid cushion away - and if she sees it so be it!

[YesitsBess]

Charity shop, and next time she comes over eat an éclair (option on two) whilst maintaining direct eye contact.

[Welshlavalove]

@LadyTiredWinterBottom2

Did it go with your house decor? Do you have other items like this?

If she isn't normally passive aggressive l wouldn't take it to heart.

Have a few cushions but nothing with little sayings, think i am super aware she is always saying dp looks pregnant and felt that pillow was a dig at me .

[LadyTiredWinterBottom2]

Did it go with your house decor? Do you have other items like this?

If she isn't normally passive aggressive l wouldn't take it to heart.

[Kazzzzzzzzzzz]

You could always email her the link to this thread....then she'd see that most people think it's a nasty,bitchy 'gift'

[Dillydollydingdong]

Rude

[CambsAlways]

Yes she’s certainly making it personal to you, as you say she makes digs to her own son, not very funny really, she should quite frankly mind her own buisness fat shaming isn’t very nice

[purplevamp]

@Eslteacher06

I'd save it for her birthday and regift it to her. Mehehe

Exactly, do this. This is the type of present I get from my MiL and her kids.

[Jewel52]

Just rude and designed to make you feel bad. You can’t pick your in-laws but you sure can chuck their tat away!

[Pingu32]

Sew a piece of material over it and embroider on it 'Thank heavens we can at least pick our friends if not our family' or something else poignant - make sure it's on display if you ever let her back in your home