Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

No bathroom bin

828 replies

Veeveeoxox · 25/12/2021 19:54

If you are at relatives house with no bathroom bins where do you put your used sanitary stuff? I've been wrapping my tampons putting in handbag and putting them in the outside bin. I would always empty the bathroom bin and my periods are very heavy so need changing frequently., SIL isnt menopausal even my dad who lives alone has bathroom bins ??!!

OP posts:
limitedperiodonly · 01/01/2022 14:38

@PinkSparklyPussyCat colostomy bags are next on my list to be the hostess with the mostest in 2022. I also resolve to be clearer in my posts to eliminate the possibility of misinterpretation.

On the upside this thread has made me realise that my house is well equipped to cater for the casual visitor or a staying guest - even an unexpected one.

But though it makes me sound like the Queen there are some things my husband and I do not provide because we do not use them. The reason I call it wifework is because it's generally only women who agonise over providing things that go beyond normal levels of hospitality in a private home and not a hotel.

The list includes sanitary protection, condoms, the morning after pill and nappies. Disclaimer: this list is for guide purposes only and is no means an exclusive list of things people may be dismayed not to find in our establishment.

On the upside we do have loads of towelling slippers bearing the names of various actual hotels we have stayed in. My husband is addicted to collecting those and also rather nice pencils and notelets so visitors could always write us a thank you note or an IOU.

We don't have hiking gear because there's no call for it where we live but we do have spare Oyster cards which visitors have been thrilled by when they've arrived for some sightseeing intending to register. We've got five, maybe more, because we keep mislaying them in different pockets. It's pot luck whether you get an Oyster that's just been topped up with £20 or one with nothing on it. For the avoidance of doubt we do not require visitors to reimburse us but to leave the Oyster on the shelf by the front door as they leave. I wasn't being serious about the IOU either.

I think that element of chance about the Oyster cards enhances the experience of coming to visit us even though we don't provide tampons and frown on people putting used ones in the bathroom bin.

DillDanding · 01/01/2022 19:29

We stayed with friends for 2 nights this week. It was a big group.

I brought up this thread and asked if anyone would object to a guest putting used tampons in their kitchen bin, or guest bathroom bins. The answer was a unanimous 'yuck - no way'.

mathanxiety · 01/01/2022 19:35

How do they feel about snotty tissues, @DillDanding.

There's a huge amount of misogyny behind the Yuck associated with used sanpro.

DillDanding · 01/01/2022 19:41

I don't know re used tissues; we didn't cover that. But surely people would flush those?

The visceral 'yuck' reactions were mostly from the women.

mathanxiety · 01/01/2022 19:43

The reason I call it wifework is because it's generally only women who agonise over providing things that go beyond normal levels of hospitality in a private home and not a hotel.

If your husband doesn't get involved in decisions about purchases of household supplies, then maybe I can see why you feel so put upon.

Why do you think anyone agonises over this? It's as simple as providing loo roll. You simply decide you will provide for the basic sanitary needs of all of your guests, not just men, pop a pack of pads or tampons in your trolley, bring it home, put it in the bathroom, and have a bin in the bathroom where all of your guests can deposit tissues, sanpro, or any other used personal items.

If your definition of 'normal levels of hospitality' doesn't include the needs of female guests, maybe ask yourself why the default is the needs of men.

mathanxiety · 01/01/2022 19:47

I don't know re used tissues; we didn't cover that. But surely people would flush those?

Nobody should flush tissues. They are designed not to break down easily in water or snot. Tissues contribute to the huge fatbergs which clog sewers. The only thing you should flush is loo paper.

The visceral reaction of the women which you observed is a great example of internalised misogyny.

DillDanding · 01/01/2022 19:51

I honestly didn't know that about tissues. I never use them, but my husband does sometimes and I tell him off if he puts them in the bin! Lesson learnt...

RussiasGreatestLoveMachine · 01/01/2022 19:51

Off the back of this thread, I’m going to get a small bin for our main bathroom, but it will only be in use when we have guests, as we don’t see the need for it any other time.

So even though I use a mooncup and have no need to leave used sanpro sitting in a bin…

And even though I would never dream of leaving my used sanpro in someone else’s bin, my DD and her friends will be entering that stage of life soon, and I don’t want them to be inconvenienced.

I do have a range of sanitary products in our bathroom for any guest who rifles through our cabinet, and we do have a lot of people through our house (albeit not that often overnight).

And my bottom line is that I still think leaving used sanpro in other people’s bins for them to dispose of is not OK to do.

Tissues and loo paper get flushed, so they’re not something other people have to dispose of.

Mandy8888 · 01/01/2022 19:52

I would wrap up and hide it then maybe put in kitchen bin or take it home.

honeylemonteaforme · 01/01/2022 19:58

This thread is still going???

VanGoghsDog · 01/01/2022 20:42

@limitedperiodonly - nice that you enjoy making fun of Neuro diverse people.

No, face/nose tissues should not go in the loo. It's really simple - pee, poo, toilet paper.

Normal tissue doesn't dissolve in the same way.

The most outstanding thing about this thread to me is that so many people don't have guests. And they say "I don't need to provide nice things for guests, I don't have guests". And they can't see that maybe no-one wants to visit their house anyway, since it's so clear they don't want guests.....

Anyway, I like having guests, I enjoy it, so I try to make it nice for them to be here.

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 01/01/2022 20:56

I have guests, not to stay over admittedly as I don't have the space (I'm waiting to be told I can give up my bed!) and I hope they are comfortable. However they know me well enough to ask me if they need some of my san pro or are too daft to see the bin!

To those who supply san pro, where do you stop? Do you supply Tena lady in case your guests need them?

mathanxiety · 01/01/2022 21:37

@RussiasGreatestLoveMachine, tissues are not for flushing - they don't break down and they cause problems in the sewers.

mathanxiety · 01/01/2022 21:39

@VanGoghsDog, yes, all the laughter about colostomy bags isn't pleasant. I agree that there is a clear demarcation here.

mathanxiety · 01/01/2022 21:48

To those who supply san pro, where do you stop? Do you supply Tena lady in case your guests need them?

Not yet, but as my friends and I grow older I may well do that.

I supply all sorts of drinks, different types of coffee and tea, etc, and they're not all strictly necessary, so why not sanpro and other incontinence products which people really, really need on occasion? If you don't find your favourite brand of Earl Grey in my kitchen your day probably won't be ruined, but lack of sanpro could really spoil a visit.

You seem to find the concept of hospitality a struggle.

KateyKontent · 01/01/2022 22:49

No bathroom bin her my family and in-laws don't have them, will never get one.

I lived at home with 3 sisters, I'm the only woman in my household. It goes into the outside bin. Recycling in the kitchen.

limitedperiodonly · 01/01/2022 23:04

[quote VanGoghsDog]@limitedperiodonly - nice that you enjoy making fun of Neuro diverse people.

No, face/nose tissues should not go in the loo. It's really simple - pee, poo, toilet paper.

Normal tissue doesn't dissolve in the same way.

The most outstanding thing about this thread to me is that so many people don't have guests. And they say "I don't need to provide nice things for guests, I don't have guests". And they can't see that maybe no-one wants to visit their house anyway, since it's so clear they don't want guests.....

Anyway, I like having guests, I enjoy it, so I try to make it nice for them to be here.[/quote]
@VanGoghsDog how dare you say I enjoy making fun of neuro diverse people?

That is devastating to me and I do not understand why you have said that. It is completely untrue.

I am choosing to believe that you don't understand what a nasty thing that is to say about someone because I wouldn't like to believe anyone would say that deliberately.

limitedperiodonly · 01/01/2022 23:22

I don't think about men while pushing a trolley round Sainsbury's. I put in the things I want and the things my husband wants if he's remembered to put them on the list. If it's not on the list then it can't be important. I have weightier matters on my mind on my way to evolving into a higher being.

limitedperiodonly · 01/01/2022 23:30

I blow my nose on loo paper. Doesn't everyone? It's mind blowing to discover that people don't do exactly the same thing as me. Even so I am content with that. It's not going to make me buy a selection of sanitary products or condoms and look kindly on people who put them in my bathroom bin.

ruthydoodles24f · 01/01/2022 23:32

We have a regular sized bin just outside our bathroom that gets emptied daily
We have a lot of people in our family so a little bathroom bin wouldn't cut it

mathanxiety · 02/01/2022 00:33

I put in the things I want and the things my husband wants if he's remembered to put them on the list.

I think it is reasonable to infer that your husband doesn't think of the needs of any women who might visit the house. So the needs of men are the default.

I have weightier matters on my mind on my way to evolving into a higher being.

The needs of women are something not worthy of your brainspace?

mathanxiety · 02/01/2022 00:36

colostomy bags are next on my list to be the hostess with the mostest in 2022. I also resolve to be clearer in my posts to eliminate the possibility of misinterpretation.

Read this again, @limitedperiodonly. There is a mocking tone there.

DdraigGoch · 02/01/2022 00:52

As for the poster who says she has a cat litter in her toilet I can't think of anything more gross. Cat poo in your own bathroom? MN is certainly an education into how people live.

Far preferable to your unsuspecting neighbours coming across it while gardening.

DdraigGoch · 02/01/2022 00:56

what do you do with used condoms late at night?
Chance would be a fine thing.

As for visitors, surely they can contain their urges for one night. I'm not sure that I want to hear the sofa bed's springs twanging away from downstairs...

Snugglybuggly · 02/01/2022 01:00

@mathanxiety

To those who supply san pro, where do you stop? Do you supply Tena lady in case your guests need them?

Not yet, but as my friends and I grow older I may well do that.

I supply all sorts of drinks, different types of coffee and tea, etc, and they're not all strictly necessary, so why not sanpro and other incontinence products which people really, really need on occasion? If you don't find your favourite brand of Earl Grey in my kitchen your day probably won't be ruined, but lack of sanpro could really spoil a visit.

You seem to find the concept of hospitality a struggle.

Way over the top! Guests should bring their own san pro