Page 6 | Is this wierd or is it me?

Luckyducky75 · 2021-12-23T08:06:14+00:00

I'm really cross and not sure why to be honest. My DH and I have a 3 year old who can be a bit challenging but nothing out of the ordinary. A friend is staying with us for Christmas so she's in our DS room and he's in with us. In the early hours of the morning he decided it was time to get up and had a tantrum when told he couldn't go downstairs. DH and I were trying to comfort him in bed when my friend opened the door and stuck her head round to 'see if everything is ok'. Of course it bloody was, he's just doing what kids do sometimes and what does she think she could have done to help the situation? I was a bit rude, I don't know why it's annoyed me so much, it felt like such an intrusion. Would you do that? Am I just overtired and being a bitch?

CoalCraft · 23/12/2021 11:17

I wouldn't go into any other adult's bedroom tbh unless it was a real emergency. I even feel a bit weird going into my mum's en suite to grab some paracetamol for her a bit uncomfortable. Going into non-family's room, unannounced, without being invited is bizarre. I'm not surprised you didn't like it OP.

oftenbaffled · 23/12/2021 11:18

I honestly can not get my ahead around this

A friend so very close that they are staying over for the entire Christmas period

And yet you get in an arse about this?

WonderfulYou · 23/12/2021 11:52

Wow I wouldn’t want to be friends with some of the posters here who assume such ill intent in friends!

I agree!

I remember my friend staying mine for a couple of days when my DD was a baby and every time she cried my friend would rush to get her - as she wanted to help me out.
There was nothing she could do as I was BF but she just wanted to support me in any way possible.

oftenbaffled · 23/12/2021 11:55

@JosephineDeBeauharnais

She was letting you know that the noise was too much and she thought you weren’t doing enough about it. Passive aggressive.

This is a friend. Not just any old friend A friend so close that staying them for an extended period over Christmas

ManicPixie · 23/12/2021 12:13

“Wow I wouldn’t want to be friends with some of the posters here who assume such ill intent in friends!”

Yup. So many bad-faith assumptions on here. Makes me wonder if the posters in question even have any real friends.

CriminalOrator · 23/12/2021 12:15

Gosh, how common. My two year old toddlers vocalise loudly with non-word based ululations whilst physically manifesting their frustration at a world not designed for their needs. They do this numerous times a day over ANYTHING and especially linked to some perceived injustice one has perpetrated against the other. But they would never be so base as to scream or tantrum.

PinkSyCo · 23/12/2021 12:19

I’m not sure about cross but I would be extremely irritated if a friend opened my bedroom door without knocking to ask such a stupid question. What does she do if your DS’s having a tantrum in front of her? Is she quite so ‘helpful’ then?

oftenbaffled · 23/12/2021 12:21

@ManicPixie

So many threads I’ve read about posters moaning they have no friends

Not least bit surprised from what I read on threads like this! These people see shadows everywhere!!

Original poster

Luckyducky75 · 23/12/2021 12:22

@oftenbaffled

I honestly can not get my ahead around this

A friend so very close that they are staying over for the entire Christmas period

And yet you get in an arse about this?

Have you actually read my posts? Come back when you have! Not bothered at all she's staying the entire Christmas period and not sure where you got that.

OP posts:

Original poster

Luckyducky75 · 23/12/2021 12:25

To make clear I don't think she had any other intention other than to check we were all ok. Am sure there was no I'll intent and she's a good friend. Am learning you need to be very specific on here or people just make up shit. I just don't think she needed to come into the bedroom unannounced at 1am!

OP posts:

oftenbaffled · 23/12/2021 12:26

A friend is staying with us for the Christmas.

This was last night?

A friend to arrive on the 22nd and be staying for Christmas… I regard that as an extended Christmas stay and surely a good friend!

oftenbaffled · 23/12/2021 12:27

@Luckyducky75

To make clear I don't think she had any other intention other than to check we were all ok. Am sure there was no I'll intent and she's a good friend. Am learning you need to be very specific on here or people just make up shit. I just don't think she needed to come into the bedroom unannounced at 1am!

So if you truly thought that

Why the heck did you start this thread?

CriminalOrator · 23/12/2021 12:55

@Luckyducky75

To make clear I don't think she had any other intention other than to check we were all ok. Am sure there was no I'll intent and she's a good friend. Am learning you need to be very specific on here or people just make up shit. I just don't think she needed to come into the bedroom unannounced at 1am!

Confused as to what this was all for, then.

I have however learnt that saying a child is ‘screaming’ and having a ‘tantrum’ is apparently an appalling thing to do.

RockingMyFiftiesNot · 23/12/2021 12:55

She was letting you know that the noise was too much and she thought you weren’t doing enough about it.
Passive aggressive

OR

She was woken up in the middle of the night and she was letting you know that The noise was worrying her as she doesn't (seem to )have children of her own. She thought she might be able to do something to help.
Kind and caring.

Original poster

Luckyducky75 · 23/12/2021 13:21

I started the thread because I thought it was wierd to go into a couples bedroom unannounced in the middle of the night and it was unnecessary but you obviously think this is fine behaviour so you're not invited for Christmas next year either!

OP posts:

PearlclutchersInc · 23/12/2021 13:54

You know your friend - was she being PA or is she unused to kids and genuinely thought she could help?

I wonder if she's trying to work out when she can leave......

oftenbaffled · 23/12/2021 13:55

Perish the thought!

Irritable host posting about my perceived wrongs on mumsnet
And a tantruming toddler waking me in the night (those days thankfully done and dusted!)

CriminalOrator · 23/12/2021 14:03

@Luckyducky75

I started the thread because I thought it was wierd to go into a couples bedroom unannounced in the middle of the night and it was unnecessary but you obviously think this is fine behaviour so you're not invited for Christmas next year either!

The difference is, I have a child. I’d be a little bit miffed to be woken in the night but I’d lie there feeling sorry for you, listening out for you having to take them downstairs. At which point I’d have joined you and put the kettle on.

SleepingStandingUp · 23/12/2021 14:16

@oftenbaffled
This is a friend.
Not just any old friend
This is a. M&S friends??

A friend so close that staying them for an extended period over Christmas

oftenbaffled · 23/12/2021 14:17

CriminalOrator · 23/12/2021 14:18

[quote SleepingStandingUp]@oftenbaffled
This is a friend.
Not just any old friend
This is a. M&S friends??

A friend so close that staying them for an extended period over Christmas[/quote]
😂

pradaville · 23/12/2021 14:39

Yes it was off and totally rude. She shld not have come in to your bedroom. At the very least she cld have knocked and asked if everything was alright. Not that she cld have done anything. To walk in ur room though such an invasion of privacy. She wldnt be getting an invite back I think.

LawnFever · 23/12/2021 15:10

Yabu, your friend had just been woken up in the middle of the night to a screaming child, it’s normal to wonder if everything was ok.

Somethingsnappy · 23/12/2021 15:35

@Luckyducky75

I started the thread because I thought it was wierd to go into a couples bedroom unannounced in the middle of the night and it was unnecessary but you obviously think this is fine behaviour so you're not invited for Christmas next year either!

CriminalOrator · 23/12/2021 15:55

The totally polarity in views on here is fascinating.