To ask at what age were your children the most expensive?

[Invisiblewoman1]

I am trying to plan and prepare for being a single parent. I think the under 5 (childcare) and then teenage years are prob most expensive. Am I totally wrong?!

I'm shocked that parents feel they have to pay for driving lessons and a car! Is that the norm? I thought teenagers got jobs to pay for some things. I didn't learn to drive until I could pay for my own lessons which was when I got my first job after uni.

University is eye wateringly expensive.

@qpmz

I'm shocked that parents feel they have to pay for driving lessons and a car! Is that the norm? I thought teenagers got jobs to pay for some things. I didn't learn to drive until I could pay for my own lessons which was when I got my first job after uni.

Of course you don't have to. You may not be able to.

My teengers always had jobs but driving lessons and insurance is really expensive, so we have helped!

@U8976532

Two down two to go. Cannot believe I used to bemoan nursery and school fees

Ok so anyone like @Jessie75 saying now is more expensive, can we have a (rough) breakdown of what your nursery fees were and what you're paying now? Also baring In mind the OP's posts that she is looking at nearly £1200 a month childminder.

I'm going to guess the first list is necessity and the second lots of optional. The uni gap if your kid gets the minimal loans is £500 a month, I was paying £1000 a month at the toughest point of nursery for ONE child, so double that but OP is only having one. With a 3 year gap mine overlapped in nursery but won't in uni unless eldest does a 4 year course.

I swear it's just the same crowd of mums that like to doom and gloom on the newer mums constantly, always see it in here.

Agree with this.

Also agree with
But you get much of that is optional and many parents don't provide that? Vs similarly priced childcare fees that are not optional, one way or another a young child needs looking after.

It is FACT that a baby / toddler / small child HAS TO have someone looking after them - whether that is childminder or Nursery, or whether that is their parent, who then isn't earning (so loss of income equivalent to or more than you would pay for care).
All the things people are talking about that they choose to pay for, for their teens and adult dc (obviously except food and clothes) are optional and are to be prioritised according to your budget and the value you put on them. Absolutely fine if you have the income, but never a necessity.

But that's £3.85 to or thereabouts to save each week of the year, to have £200 for a Christmas present. Unless living in extreme poverty, in the UK that is not out of many people's reach if it is a priority for them.

I think the key here is "if it is a priority".
Plus, of course, you are assuming only one child.

They are incredibly expensive all the way through, because of nursery, followed by private education, then university. The costs just roll up and up every year. But the big hit would be when they buy their first property. I am expecting all their X'mases to come at once.

Childcare is expensive but as a single parent I have had some of this paid by tax credits. My eldest is 16 at the moment and this is the most expensive year yet. His college bus is £800 per year plus he has needed overalls and steel recap boots. He does 1 day per week work experience and needs money to get 2 buses there and back, plus lunch money. Also I have been transferring him a monthly allowance so he can begin to manage his own expenses.
Definitely the most expensive year yet apart from childcare. I'm hoping his placement leads to a part time job!

@Kite22 not all parents pay big nursery fees.

Some work shifts around each other so both earn and no childcare needed.

Some have family support.

Some were not very well paid in the first place so dont "lose" much if they either dont work or dont work full time and get tax credits.

Some are students and get subsidised childcare.

For families like this the early years are not the most expensive.

@Porcupineintherough but the OP has stated she has limited family support, will be a single parent working full time and will be looking at £1200 a month in childcare...seeing as this post is for the OP's benefit what you list is all moot no?

I answered the question in the thread title.

Now - 11, 14 & 16 year olds.

I've just tried to note down what I pay for my 16 year old of the top of my head per month - frightening!!
Train pass £40
Extra tuition £280
Phone £30
School lunch £60
Extra-activites (DofE, Gym, Music) £200
Food £200
Clothing £100
School Trips / Activity weeks £50
Pocket money £80
Savings acct £80
Plus - laptop for school, tech, b day gifts, school books, sports kit, outdoor kit - all adult man size, adult meals out and prices on holidays
I reckon it's a good £1200-£1500 a month.
She does earn money herself too which is why pocket money is £20 a week without an allowance

Every god damn year 😂😂😂

Thank you @TheNamelessGirl and @U8976532

@4pmwinetimebebeh That's not too bad. Yes, the nursery fees are crippling, that's why I was hoping things get easier when they're at school.

A lot of the things people have listed are optional though. £100 a month for clothes and £80 pocket money 😮
I got new clothes maybe twice a year and it was things from the sale like a £5 top and £15 jeans. At 16 I had a part time job for pocket money and clothes.

Found 2 in secondary books all new editions so was costly. One working now 19 so bought his car. We helped with insurance as so costly

£100 a month for clothes / shoes for a 17year old doesn't go far! School uniform this year was £400 by the time I had bought school shoes, trainers, rugby boots, uniform, sports kit - a blazer was £40, a PE hoody another £45. Shoes are £60 a pop. Then there's the boot bags, school bags, school coat before Ive even started with clothes and shoes for outside school. My 17 year old is still growing so its a case of re-buying something every 6 mths which is expensive in adult sizes.

Yes the nursery fees were expensive but D.C. at Uni are just money pits. Dd can't get a part time job because of the intensity of the course and her maintenance loan no where near covers her rent. Then the eight books she needed at the cost of £50 upwards each made me weep. Then she needs formalwear for certain events...

And I've just looked in the cupboards and fridge that were stocked up yesterday, the 17 year old ds who is very tall and well built, well he seems to have hoovered everything up overnight ffs.

Yes, uni was very draining.
My eldest's rent was £5000+ per year. She was allocated catered halls. We tried to change but weren't able to.
She received £3250 at that time so we had to top up. Plus we had to give her money for food as the dinner lounge would close before she got back from lectures ( late lectures/seminars and two bus journeys as it wasn't a campus uni.)

Catering didn't happen at weekends!

She did private student lets for next two years but still needed a top up for the rent plus all food costs. Plus student railcard, bus pass plus train/coach fares to and from home.

Very similar with son , three years later.