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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Twat at the softplay car park

413 replies

CheeseFiend36 · 12/12/2021 13:36

Leaving soft play this morning and walking towards our car. A family had parked next to us and were getting ready to go in. Their car was parked really close to my right side which is where toddler DS's car seat is. I opened his door really gently but couldn't open it wide enough to get him in without making some contact with their car, so I rested it on their left side passenger door and I made sure I did it softly, even then it was still tight. Man from the family comes up behind me while I was strapping DS in and says "please can you take your door off my car". I turned around and politely asked "sorry?", He repeated it. I said "I've done it gently", he then started walking off and said sarcastically "oh that makes it ok then", I said loudly back "well if you gave me some space I wouldn't have had to", which he ignored

Was I being unreasonable to have leaned my car door against his so that I had some space to put my child in? I wasn't tutting or being arsey or anything, but I'm not sure what he expected me to do

OP posts:
OhMyCrump · 12/12/2021 16:53

YANBU

lesenfantsdelesperance · 12/12/2021 16:53

@DixieSun

UABU. You can't do that gently and think it's okay? Grin
Perhaps you can't, but it is possible. A skill to work on?
Just10moreminutesplease · 12/12/2021 16:54

[quote EvilPea]@Just10moreminutesplease
@fakereview
Nope parked right over against the kerb on the drivers side so I had ample space the other side. Ridiculously tiny car that’s 20 years old. It was immaculate, due to low mileage and always parking away from shops and leaving big gaps like that.

I now have speckles all done the door where she’s buffed the paintwork away from getting in and out. I watched her do it, but decided it wasn’t worth the inevitable argument with someone who clearly thought it was ok to do that.

It’s not ok to damage someone else’s things.[/quote]
Then your situation and the OP’s are completely different.

limitedperiodonly · 12/12/2021 16:56

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

Arepeoplereallycoolaboutthis · 12/12/2021 16:57

YANBU

Hrpuffnstuff1 · 12/12/2021 16:57

[quote Dobbysgotthesocks]@Hrpuffnstuff1 did you miss the part where the op said they are REAR FACING CAR SEATS??? You cannot lean through from the front to do the straps up.
I call 🐮 💩 on you being able to do so! [/quote]
Is that a bull or a cow? Grin

Of course, you can, just fold your seatback. I could actually place the baby and small toddler in the seat with one hand. Just lift them up.
Toddlers don't really need a hand, teach them to climb in it's much easier.

Rear-facing seats, we only used them when the kids were babies.

Theremoresefulday · 12/12/2021 16:58

I always leave myself plenty of room to swing my not white working fat lady thighs out.

Theremoresefulday · 12/12/2021 16:58

*quite

limitedperiodonly · 12/12/2021 16:59

I mean no disrespect to anyone but would advise some people on this thread to lower their expectations about law enforcement.

SirChenjins · 12/12/2021 17:02

YANBU - if you choose to park like an arse (as he did then) you are choosing to put your car at risk. Other users of the car park have neither the time nor the inclination to twat about after you by climbing over passenger seats or taking kids back inside and waiting for staff to put out tannoy announcements (that they may or may not do, depending on policy).

EvilPea · 12/12/2021 17:02

I’ve put mine in via the boot before over the parcel shelf and in the seat. Job done

TheGoogleMum · 12/12/2021 17:03

He should have left you more space.

SusieBob · 12/12/2021 17:06

Ah, classic mumsnet. Managing to take a stupid every day incident and turn it into a massive bunfight.

Grin
icedcoffees · 12/12/2021 17:12

@limitedperiodonly

I mean no disrespect to anyone but would advise some people on this thread to lower their expectations about law enforcement.
Ha, well said. The police won't give a flying fuck about someone reversing a few metres in a private car park with a toddler on the front seat.
MintyGreenDream · 12/12/2021 17:15

I had this argument in a car park,came back to a woman knocking my passenger side with her drivers door.Id only been passed a week.

Unmerited · 12/12/2021 17:16

@Dilbertian

You were the twat, OP. Of course you should not lean your door on another car! However gentle you are you may scratch the other car. Use the other door if you can't get in by the most convenient one.

How entitled.

Entitled to… what?
Rosebel · 12/12/2021 17:25

Why didn't you put them in from the side you could open the door, buckle your baby in, get in the front, turn round and buckle your toddler in. I can remember doing this when I had 2 under 2.
No need to drive with children unrestrained or risk marking another car.

Fomofo · 12/12/2021 17:26

Entitled better describes people who own cars that cannot be touched

JetRocket · 12/12/2021 17:26

@PinkWednesdays

That’s not what @User135792468 said and please do read back you’ll see. They make out the OP is rejecting loads of perfectly good and sensible options to be purposely difficult when in fact they have suggested no legal or practical options.

‘Here’s one illegal option and one impractical option and if you don’t like all of those many many choices then you’re the problem’ and that is gaslighting.

Also @user, perhaps you have a larger can than me. Perhaps your swivel seats make it easier but I could not climb in and put my kids in. I wish I could but I couldn’t so I certainly wouldn’t assume the OP could.

Also using ‘lots of people said the same as me’ to defend putting kids at risk and acting illegally doesn’t make it better does it? Lots of stupidity doesn’t make it less stupid Hmm

JetRocket · 12/12/2021 17:27

*car

Figgyboa · 12/12/2021 17:28

YABU.

Tigerwhocameforsupper · 12/12/2021 17:33

I keep a piece of pool noodle with a slit in it for cases like this.

Slot it onto the edge of the car door so the foam protects the car it’s resting on while I wrestle toddler into car seat.

FrankGrillosWrist · 12/12/2021 17:36

So many people appear to climb over? I’ve never seen any adult do this.

StoneofDestiny · 12/12/2021 17:42

I'd never lean my car door on anybody else's car - I don't want to damage my car, let alone theirs. I'd be unhappy about it and said so. That said, I avoid parking anywhere near cars with child seats - and don't park close to lines.
As for being 'precious' about your car - well, it's likely to be the second most valuable thing you own - so not unreasonable to want to look after it. (When I drove old bangers, it bothered me less).

Suspiciousmind20 · 12/12/2021 17:46

YANBU. You were there first. If you parked centrally in the space and he parked skewed towards your car then he should have moved. If he didn’t leave enough space then he needs to accept the door of the car, that was already there when he parked, might need to be rested on his car. He should have said ‘oh sorry, I’ve parked a bit too close, would you like me to move?’ That’s what I’d have done.