Head Teacher at prospective school

[WhoopsWhatsMyNameAgain]

So it's that time of year when we do the rounds to see which primary schools we want to send our kids to...

We've viewed 3 within our catchment area and had thought one in particular we were especially interested in. BUT I've been up tossing and turning over the Head and need some views from other parents please (and maybe teachers if you're here!).

1. AIBU to be put off that a Head of a state primary sends her young daughter to a private school? We have LOADS of very well regarded state primary schools around where she lives and works (I know where she lives and where her daughter goes through Facebook) and the fact she sends her child to Private makes me feel like she doesn't believe in the system she works for. Why should I send my child to her school if even she doesn't believe it's good enough?

2. she has been at the school 2 years. She's mid-late 30s and extremely ambitious from her LinkedIn profile and organisations shes involved in. That's great but this, combined with the fact she's been off sick for 2 months now, suggests to me she may not stick around, AIBU to assume that?

We initially loved the school partially for some of the aspects that are Head dependent so I'm now questioning it. She's also changed the whole school curriculum in the past 2 years which makes me worry as they were great performing in 2019 data so who knows the impact of this.

Help please! Are any of the above red flags for you too?

(Considering we have other great options too)

It is unreasonable to be looking the Head up on FB and making judgements about her choices. You know nothing about her.

I would ask about the curriculum changes, that would be a concern to me.

Are you friends with her on Facebook?

This would really put me off a school for all of the reasons you’ve mentioned. A good school can very quickly go downhill without good leadership.

@autumnboys of course she’s not unreasonable to look the head up on Facebook. If the heads profile has info on available to the public then that’s on her. Anyone is free to look

The deputy head at my son's primary home educates his kids. Well his wife just, seeing as he's at work all day. Made me feel weird too, exactly like you say, they're rejecting the system for their kids.

He's left now. To home school his kids.

You are overthinking this.

She may not live close enough for her hild to even attend. Weird reasons to be put off.

She might use the prep school because the wraparound is much better. Heads work long hours.

My DS's standard prep school day is 8am to 5pm and they can offer care from 7.30am to 7.30pm and flexi boarding. This enables me to work in a state school (SLT, but not a Head) where I need to be in school by at least 8am and can't be out until well after 5pm on many days and there is zero flexibility.

Perhaps her child goes to private school as they tend to have better pre and after school wraparound which allows her to work ?

How do you know what she’s been off with that makes you think she spent be returning ?

Honestly, very odd to dig into staff members private lives.

@Senmumm2021

She may not live close enough for her hild to even attend. Weird reasons to be put off.

As I said, I can see where she lives on Facebook. It is close enough and there are LOTS of very highly regarded state primaries within her catchment (it's quite near to us so I know the area and schools)

The private school her child goes to is actually quite a bit further away than the school she Heads at, and much further than the many other schools on her doorstep.

The off sick for two months would worry me more than the private school thing.

I agree with you absolutely OP.

The head sees the schools as a means to further her ambitions. She doesn't believe in what she's doing and that's the one thing that makes a huge difference to a school.

@Star81

Perhaps her child goes to private school as they tend to have better pre and after school wraparound which allows her to work ?

How do you know what she’s been off with that makes you think she spent be returning ?

Honestly, very odd to dig into staff members private lives.

My children will be at a school for 6 years. Of course I will be looking up all I can about a Head if she's one of the reasons I like the school. It's a bit naive/dated of you to suggest otherwise. She should use a different name as many teachers do if she wants to stay private. Or change her privacy settings.

She could be sending her child for that, except most primaries here have good wrap around provision. She's not the only person who works long hours.

Another good school locally has sent both her kids to the school she Heads at. That gives me more faith that she believes what she offers other kids is good enough for her own.

She has made the choice right for her child.

You make the choice right for your child.

Someone’s else’s choices shouldn’t impact yours.

Focus on the school itself not one staff member who could leave at any point anyway!

How do you know where she lives?

Maybe she moved to the area and her child was already at the private school. Maybe her partner (have you stalked them too) had their say where DC was educated.

Her husband could work at the prep school and get a fee discount. Also more convenient for pick up and drop offs and wraparound.

It doesn’t mean she doesn’t believe in the system. It just shows that she can see the limitations (class sizes) and the limited funds for extra curricular. These are things totally beyond her control when it comes to her own school.

@Sirzy

She has made the choice right for her child.

You make the choice right for your child.

Someone’s else’s choices shouldn’t impact yours.

Focus on the school itself not one staff member who could leave at any point anyway!

But this staff member is the head. The person who literally determines everything about how the school is run. If the head leaves it's a different school.

Our head and his wife (also) a teacher sent theirs to a private school to avoid ever having them as pupils!

But that goes for any school. Nobody ever knows what’s around the corner. That’s why you need to look at the whole school and not focus on one staff member. Certainly don’t focus on one staff member to the extent the OP is which is very much on tne extreme side of things!

The thing is it doesn’t really matter where she educated her kids - if private is not an option for you then it shouldn’t even factor into whether she thinks the state system could do with improvement or not. The school itself and how it is run is the only thing that should matter. Heads unfortunately can move anytime and I’d be amazed if you could find this information about all heads of all schools you look round.

Agree with you op.

Wow stop stalking the head teacher.
Seriously you need to give your head a wobble and stay away from her Facebook and LinkedIn pages.

Crikey you sound like hard work. I know picking a school is important but people are entitled to a private life away from work, even head teachers.

They are many reasons why she might have picked the school she picked for her child, we can't judge her choices because we don't know all the factors.

She might have changed the curriculum because the old one was too assessment based, hence good results but no broad and balanced opportunities for the children. Who knows?

Stalking her on Facebook is weird and intrusive!