To be so upset I’ve been denied leave to attend a funeral

[Purplehighlighters]

I’m quite shocked about this and really upset … not even sure why I’m posting but a bit stunned.

I can see why if it’s for a friend. Sorry. But when I worked in education I wouldn’t have been allowed time off for the funeral of a friend either.

I am sorry though

It’s one hour I need - it’s made me feel pretty shit and I feel so awful I can’t pay my respects.

When I was teaching I went to the funerals of several ‘aunts and uncles’. I told my Head teacher that I came from a large family, which was actually true but most of them had died before I started there. If the funeral was in the morning then I would go back in for the afternoon. On the other hand, I went back to work the day after my grandmother’s funeral even though it took place 200 miles away.

I’m so sorry OP 💐

@Purplehighlighters can you negotiate the hour or so rather than the day? Perhaps you can see some of the people after work as well?

I know it's crap, I couldn't go to a funeral of a close friend once (police officer). I went to the wake after work.

Can you go to the wake?

It's so hard when you teach isn't it, I know rules are so strict.
Can you switch your PPA time with another member of staff to cover?

I just knew you were a teacher as soon as I saw your thread. I think decent heads usually allow time for funerals, although these aren't normal times unfortunately. Sorry for your loss. maybe try to talk to the head in person?

@Purplehighlighters

It’s one hour I need - it’s made me feel pretty shit and I feel so awful I can’t pay my respects.

You can go and pay your respects. You don't need to attend the funeral to do that.

I’ve only asked for the one hour. Is what I mean.

I don’t know what you mean @girlmom21

Have you asked for unpaid leave?
Although unpaid leave for a funeral was one of the things which tipped me over the edge and made me finally decide to leave teaching.

Also raise it with the chair of governors.

@Purplehighlighters you can go to the grave/cemetery and pay your respects without attending the funeral

Right yes but that’s not what I’m posting about.

1 hour? And they’ve said no? Even unpaid?

Shame you’re going to have to miss the whole day now because your sense of smell has gone isn’t it?

You can go back once your negative result is through. Better safe than sorry.

That's awful - it's one hour, not an entire day (or even half a day). What was their reasoning?

They’d just say to come in and to a LFT on site. I’m not going to do anything about it. Just upset.

No cover available.

It's sad, but pretty standard for schools. We wouldn't be allowed time off for a funeral unless it were immediate family. This came as a culture shock for me as an NQT as I'm from a background where it's the done thing to attend everyone's funeral no matter how distant. There are other ways to pay your respects though: send flowers to the funeral (if they're having flowers), attend the wake, if you feel comfortable doing so then pop into a church to light a candle and say a prayer (or equivalent for your religion), go visit the grave at a later time, etc.

@Purplehighlighters that is shit. As a fellow teacher it just sticks in your craw. Especially when we’ve been busting a gut in stressful situations. Such a little thing for the school to facilitate but creates a huge amount of goodwill. We had a situation here where a teacher was denied going to her child’s first nativity. Again an hour out. In the end she got to go but really!

I’m really sorry for your loss

They can’t make you come in and do a LFT for symptoms that require a PCR.

I know I’ve muddied the waters by being facetious but if they are really that bad is a union issue.

I'm SLT in a school and there's no way on earth we would have declined this, especially if you were only asking for an hour.

We do sometimes ask, when it's not a close relative, if people need the whole day, but we always find a way to let them go.

@Purplehighlighters

No cover available.

I’d be getting myself signed off with stress

Bastards. Your school sounds insane.

I know that the papers make out the unions are really powerful and militant but the best they do is agree a bland reference for you when you get managed out.

It's sad, but pretty standard for schools.

Not standard at all in my 15 years experience as a teacher. Ime a good school would let you have it, a trickier school would make you take it unpaid but I have never heard of anyone being outright refused leave for a funeral.