Suddenly feel like a crap parent.

[Ceecee30]

I did not get them a toy advent calendar like many people have posted on Facebook. They have chocolate ones. They seem happy with that but what if their friends have the toy ones and they realise they don't?

We have an elf on the shelf but he isn't half as adventurous as some. He often just sits on the shelf so climbs on the lampshade. we didn't buy one of the fancy balloons people bought to welcome him back.

We don't have matching Christmas pjs.

I don't plan to do Christmas Eve boxes.

I haven't booked a Santa experience, a winter wonderland or any other things.

We do have our decs up. We have been out looking at neighbours lights the last few nights. Dd did see Santa at a winter fayre but it was a quick whip in and out grotto. We've been to look in the local garden centre which is amazing at Christmas.

They've got a fair amount of presents each on Christmas Day itself but is all the extra leading up to it essential?

Please tell I'm not the only one who doesn't do everything everyone else is doing?!

Social media is the devil. Making me feel like we don't do much in comparison.

I'm saying this and it might sound sarcastic but it isn't honestly.

Facebook - we suck up what "everyone" else is doing and inevitably compare ourselves unfavorably. It's too much - especially at this time of year.

On every single "ooh look what we did/how much we have/how amazing our life is" post, that you feel shit at- just hit the "snooze for 30 days" button.

It's honestly bloody liberating. I'm so much happier not seeing others curated life stuff but can still access the useful stuff, groups etc. I have missed out on precisely zero useful information. And Snoozing is so much less final sounding than unfollowing and gives people a chance to post something interesting

If I could turn the bloody news feed off I would but this is a close second. Curate what content you are seeing and you will be happier without trying.

You are normal.

No elf on shelf, no choco advent calendars, my mother is taking them to a Christmas wonderland, and pressies are low key this year. None of this is because we can’t, it’s just that I don’t think it’s needed. The decorations are up, they will have new pjs and a book for Christmas Eve and that’s a long family tradition. I don’t feel guilty, I don’t worry what others are up to. Let’s all do what we feel is best for our families. Release yourself from any social pressure. You are enough.

No choc advent calendars here - we have a lovely wooden one where they take a piece out every day and by the end there’s a little nativity scene. No Christmas Eve boxes. We went to a christmas lights event but DD with ASD found it hard so not doing it again! Just a visit to Santa at the garden centre where the money goes to charity. They get one main present, sometimes another between them (this year it’s a globe), and stockings have stuff like chocolate / hair bands / socks / toothbrushes. Oh and they get a book each too.

I could've wrote this!! I posted this on Facebook the other day -

Seeing all the posts (not aimed at anyone in particular, just on social media in general) of fancy decorations, lights, trees, the effort of everyone makes for elf on the shelf etc has made me feel a bit shit about myself. I’ve spent all day trying to get a tree and decorations up and lights put up outside because I feel “everyone else has” .. and ended up in tears.. cos I couldn’t find half of them, the house is now upside down..
When I was a kid mum’s decos were probably 99p from Boyes but I loved them, there was no such thing as elf on the shelf and she certainly didn’t take photos of them to show her friends 😂
I’ve got a 10 week old, I’m only just starting to slowly recover from postnatal depression so I’m really trying my best to not let feeling inadequate set me back again. Comparison is the thief of joy as they say.
As long as my little boy is happy and knows he’s loved and my daughter has photos to look back on of her first Christmas.. I don’t think they’ll give a toss about how pretty the tree was or if the elf did outrageous things every day and I need to try to remember that.
Rant over.. sorry everyone! ✌🏼

Why would you want to be an oner-consuming household and teach that to your children?

The production, transport and disposal of all this excess tat is an environmental nightmare.

Christmas is about experiences, not stuff.

Some people love buying into the gaudy consumerism, others don't. We don't and we still have a lovely time - but I don't use Instagram so am only comparing to myself really...

@KosherDill

Why would you want to be an oner-consuming household and teach that to your children?

The production, transport and disposal of all this excess tat is an environmental nightmare.

Christmas is about experiences, not stuff.

It's easy to look at people going a tad nuts on social media and think that somehow we are failing but there are many many ways people can make Christmas magical with their children and not buy into all the consumerism.

I try hard to promote a sustainable Christmas for us - it genuinely saddens me to see certain relatives with a different colour theme on their tree every year, (obviously discarding the previous years' baubles) and a waist high mound of presents for their toddler around the tree very little of interest and more than likely landing in landfill.

And we still have a brilliant Christmas. To me it's about spending time with the people we love and like, eating well and just chilling out.

I wouldn't worry. I just have a chocolate one (courtesy of Nan, so didn't even buy it), no decorations up yet as buying a real tree this year and don't want it looking crap on the day. No Xmas Eve boxes here or PJ's - just a jumper. No overpriced santa experiences with weird middle aged men dressed as Elves and neglected deer and husky dogs.

We aren't seeing wider family this year, so we are just having a normal roast and a shop bought pudding which my son will pick. I normal go the whole hog and do the full Christmas dinner and home made puds, but as it's just us, I would rather play with my kids and enjoy Xmas Eve and Day instead of prepping dinner. I don't give a mighty fuck what other people are doing to be honest. I plan to have a great time with my half arsed Christmas!

I remember seeing family and having a laugh at Christmas when I was younger. I can't remember getting dragged around garden centres and all the other stuff, probably because it didn't exist when I was younger. In 20 years we'll have to magic real elves out of our arses to fart out toys in a cloud of glitter to keep up with Instagram.

By the way, many people you see on social media are probably getting into debt to show off. I'm sure kids would rather have relaxed parents who have no financial worries than all the things you mentioned.

We do chocolate calendars and they will get new PJs under the tree on xmas eve but that's it.

I can neither afford, or be arsed to get involved in all the other stuff.

@Nayday

I'm saying this and it might sound sarcastic but it isn't honestly.

Facebook - we suck up what "everyone" else is doing and inevitably compare ourselves unfavorably. It's too much - especially at this time of year.

On every single "ooh look what we did/how much we have/how amazing our life is" post, that you feel shit at- just hit the "snooze for 30 days" button.

It's honestly bloody liberating. I'm so much happier not seeing others curated life stuff but can still access the useful stuff, groups etc. I have missed out on precisely zero useful information. And Snoozing is so much less final sounding than unfollowing and gives people a chance to post something interesting

If I could turn the bloody news feed off I would but this is a close second. Curate what content you are seeing and you will be happier without trying.

Good advice (although not on FB for this reason).

People don't show the baliffs coming round or having to ask their parents to pay off their credit card on their news feed, or the kids tantrums because they are overwhelmed or have stupidly high expectations. Just the pretty crafty stuff and mugs of beautifully styled hot chocolate.

Living my best life....until you realise you are in debt you can't pay off, or cry into your sherry at 3pm on Christmas day because you're exhausted and the kids are arguing (again) and you still don't think you've done enough...

The saying "comparison is the thief of joy" is so true this time of year.

My kids are exhausted, so am I. Don't think they'd benefit from much more than we're doing.

We did a self fill calendar. V happy with the balloons yesterday and the odd sweet.

Aren’t the elf on shelfs made in China? Clever them! But how bad is that for the environment!