Has my date stolen my keys??

[Wilhelmine]

I’ve just come home with a guy I’ve been for a few dates with after a couple of drinks and we’ve had a coffee and he’s gone home. We’ve been getting on great and knew each other before as acquaintances. He’s a bit intense but nothing scary until tonight when he said “I don’t know what I’d do if this doesn’t work out”. Now I’ve just got ready for bed and can’t find my keys anywhere. I’m well organised and tidy and always know where things are. I’ve messaged him to ask if he picked them up by mistake but no reply. Am I being daft to think he might have taken them? If I can’t find them in the morning I’ll have to get the locks changed and I really don’t want to have to do that.....

Definitely change the locks. He sounds odd and it will give you more peace of mind.

quite a lot of key cutters will be open from quite early - often building material type trade shops, etc. I guess it depends where you live, but I'd have thought as it's after 8am, yes, he could get copies made.

There are some shops close to me that will copy keys that are supposed to be high security controlled copies (some key types, not all) - so don't necessarily rely on that.

As we're now in day time (so not 24 hour locksnith territory), if replacement keys aren't covered by your insurance policy, get a couple of quotes - and make sure that what they quote is the full cost. Only had to call out emergency locksmiths once, and the charge was double what i'd been quoted on the phone.

If he is creepy, do look in to one of those video security door bells.

Yes you do.

@Qwaurkus

He has let you worry all night and placed you in danger by not being able to lock your door overnight. That's without the red flags you noticed.

Possibly true but possibly a genuine mistake. And she has been watching You!

I was about to come on and say you are being a bit OTT and then saw your update and it confirmed you are being ridiculously OTT. Given the time of day you were calling & messaging him it's hardly surprising he didn't pick up (I have my phone on silent between 11pm & 8am as I don't want calls or messages in that time - immediate family know my landline, everyone else can wait) & whilst yes I can understand you wanting to change the locks if you don't trust him, but call the police? WTAF? ....Oh hello officer can I report that my boyfriend, who I've just decided is a bit weird, took my keys home last night. And now he's had the audacity to call this morning and is going to drop them back.

No question of course you should end it if you don't feel comfortable or are seeing red flags, but seriously people, get a grip

I would say you are being OTT - but I think given your reaction your gut is telling you something. Listen to it and change the locks.

Change the locks…even if it was a accident that he picked them up I always have a rule that if my keys end up in the hands of someone else even if I know them I change the locks. Gives me peace of mind.

CHANGE THE LOCKS

He has them, he's had enough time to copy them, you don't know him.

CHANGE THE BLOODY LOCKS

I've changed my own locks. Google shows you how.

Yes you can cut keys from blutack. A friend did this once and I work in an area where we are told never to put keys down because they can be imprinted in gum etc.

I would change locks for piece of mind, buy a cheap motion triggered camera (£21 for one I have for my pet) and install a safety chain on the doors

Friend of mine had relationship with a nice professional man in same group as her best friend (running club) Meek and mild and ever so caring....bit intense but she was smitten. He gradually changed and 18 months later police involved and he twice entered her house whilst she wasn't there leaving tell tale signs to show he had

Nothing surprises me anymore

My local sainsburys opens at 7am and there's a timpsons opposite the door that is always open at that time too. He had plenty of time to get them copied.

Haven't RTFT so I'm sure its been suggested but I'd seriously consider getting a ring doorbell, and not saying you're changing the locks. Then see if he tries to use the copied keys.

Change the locks, change the locks, change the locks.

And get rid. Go with your gut.

Change them ASAP. This guy is throwing up some big red flags! He would have no valid reason to take your keys and would have realised once he got gone if it was an accident. Change those locks!!!

@Wilhelmine

He’s just called. He’s got them and is bringing them over now. Fucking twat. Do I still need to change the locks?

YES. You clearly think he’s enough of a creep to purposefully take your keys and have copies made. So how will you ever feel safe if you break up with him and don’t know whether he has copies? It’s all very weird

Any update @Wilhelmine ?

Huge red flags all over the place, op. If he was genuine he would have brought the keys straight back. He definitely saw those messages. Most people can read texts and WhatsApp without opening them.

First priority is to make your home safe and tell your work and close family/friends what's happened so you've got people keeping an eye on you.

Then look into security cameras. They're pretty much a must nowadays anyway. When I'm home alone I can see who's at the door.

Do you have a good friend who can come over and be there while you break it off with this guy?

I'm someone who'd normally lean towards benefit of the doubt, but would change the locks for him.

Odd he's got the keys in the first place, and odd it took him all this time to get back to you. He might have conked out when he got home but given your gut instinct is he's a bit strange, why risk it?

I think it’s prob innocent, but I’d still change the locks as you won’t feel right otherwise.

He prob went to sleep and only saw your messages this morning. A lot of people don’t check their phones constantly.

And get rid now as obv he’s making you uncomfortable.

If anyone wanted a copy of your keys this is exactly how they could get them.

Accidentally pick them up

Sleep through messages and calls

Get copies cut 7am at Timpsons or B&Q

reply to message and heroically return keys

🤷‍♀️

You know you can change most fron door and back door locks easily yourself? The barrels are just held by one screw, you slide them out and put a new one in. Costs about £15 per lock for a Yale replacement. There are tutorials on YouTube. Also, I think ppl on here have been on panic mode!

I agree with getting a ring doorbell too

How the heck is he going to explain why he has them?? In more than 50 years on this earth I have never once gone to someone else’s house and accidentally walked out with their keys. It’s just not a thing. (And I say that as someone who can be seriously scatty).

Definitely change the locks, he’s had plenty of time to get copies cut this morning.

Change the locks and run for the hills!!

I wouldn't change the locks - if just leave my keys in the door so he couldn't get in for a few weeks (once he's dropped them off)

Then I'd get a ring camera doorbell

And dump by text

(I also want to know what his reason was for taking them)

Change your locks.
Get a ring doorbell.
End this now.

B&Q opened two hours ago and has a key cutting machine so he’s had the opportunity to copy them. However I think he has taken them as an excuse to see you again/be the hero. Ask him to post the keys because you are nipping out so you can avoid seeing him.