Is boastful behaviour/showing off always a sign of insecurity/low self-esteem?

[flashbac]

I seem to come across alot of boastful behaviour (either that or I am on high alert for it). Sometimes full on showing off and more often the stealth boast.
I tend to get very annoyed and impatient with people who do this (which is why I'm not on FB) but it helps me to know its often a sign of low self-worth.
But is it? Or are people just more accustomed to boasting because of the society we now live in?

@DietrichandDiMaggio

No, often it's an over-inflated ego -people who think others are more interested in their lives/family etc. than they actually are.

This. If something is good why do you need to tell all and sundry, including strangers, about it? If it's enough you'd enjoy it in private.

Well that’s sort of what social media is for though? If you’re on there you expect to see pictures of other people’s life events and all the rest.

I’m not on there but if I was I’d presume the people following me want to see pictures of my holiday or my kids in the park because they follow me specifically to see that.

@1u1a

I think the whole culture of social media - Facebook, etc - makes people feel that they need to post whatever vaguely interesting thing happens to them, just to ‘keep up.’ I’m not on any of it, but you do hear of people who, every time they get a gift or whatever, or their kids do something they are proud of, they post it on social media as a default behaviour. It does seem like boasting, but I’m not sure it comes from insecurity - more that they just perceive it as communication and ‘keeping up’ their online profile. It’s odd because British people tend to play themselves down in public, but on SM it’s the opposite!

I think this is true

Which does lead me to think if it annoys you or upsets you it will often be more about you and your dissatisfaction with your own life.

I find that an odd take because in real life people generally find someone who boasts/brags not favourable traits.

Although it shouldn't surprise me coming from @Bluntness100, self awareness is not your forte! 😆

I've been accused of being somewhat boastful about my DDs. But I genuinely think they're both adorable, clever, funny, beautiful and a joy to be with. They're amazing

I've just spent the weekend with DD1 and her new university friends. Apparently, one of them thought it was lovely that I so obviously enjoyed being with DD1 (and her with me).

@lawnotorder

Which does lead me to think if it annoys you or upsets you it will often be more about you and your dissatisfaction with your own life.

I find that an odd take because in real life people generally find someone who boasts/brags not favourable traits.

Although it shouldn't surprise me coming from @Bluntness100, self awareness is not your forte! 😆

Are you serious? You’re attacking for thr hell of it on someone’s thread.

Go you.

If something is good why do you need to tell all and sundry, including strangers, about it? If it's enough you'd enjoy it in private

Well only people who are friends or follow you would see it. I don’t have strangers follow me or be friends with me. I also don’t follow strangers or be friends with them.

I don’t get why they should enjoy it in private? I am very happy to see my friends and acquaintances having fun and what they get up to. I really don’t see it as boastful.

As said I seldom post on social media, generally if I do it’s something about th garden, but I really like seeing the different things my friends get up to.

I think being off social media if it annoys or upsets you is a good thing. For me, it is a positive so I am on it, and happy to see these things.

attacking?! 😱

The irony 😆

Yes I do think it’s deep insecurity and a desire to validate themselves.

I am sure we all think our dc are amazing and wonderful but I have no need to constantly brag. I feel a bit embarrassed for those who do.

In the UK it’s a cultural no no. In the US, Australia and NZ it is mandatory.

@Curtaintassels

Yes I do think it’s deep insecurity and a desire to validate themselves.

I just don’t see it that way. And the people I know who do it are defintely not deeply insecure or trying to validate themselves.

But some people who do boast are insecure though? Like, it is a thing.

@Curtaintassels

I am sure we all think our dc are amazing and wonderful but I have no need to constantly brag. I feel a bit embarrassed for those who do.

The thing is there are those who might post incessantly on social media and that is bragging and becomes tiresome very quickly. There are also those who post a few times a year and are still told that they are bragging.

The same on here, people are answering a question where their response is entirely on subject, they are then told that they are bragging. Some people like to use claims of bragging or boasting in some selfish attempt to belittle others.

@Bluntness100 I do, nothing you can say about that to change my mind I am afraid. The person I am thinking of on my social media is constantly telling us how beautiful and clever her daughters are. How hot her husband is. Multiple artful photos of wealth signifiers, it’s just embarrassing.

I have no need to say anything about my dc, I don’t need to post my car, house etc on social media. Because I don’t need validation from other people.

@Curtaintassels

I am sure we all think our dc are amazing and wonderful but I have no need to constantly brag. I feel a bit embarrassed for those who do.

It's not something I do relentlessly. But I do it. And, very sadly there are plenty of parents who really don't think their DCs are amazing.

Most people that moan about boasting are judging themselves by other people's haves. Which is why it grates so much.

People genuinely happy and content with their lives don't give a shit at worst, or are happy for other people to be happy/have good times too at best.

@peaceanddove oh I do but I feel so sorry for those who use their dc as a prop in life and big them up to be something that they are not. Just very ordinary offspring who are doing very ordinary things. And there is nothing wrong with that.

If my dc thought that I judged their worth by social media posts then I have failed as a parent.

@WholeClassKeptIn

I think some people who boast just have a lack of social skills/social awareness or maybe empathy for those around them.

Yes I agree with this. In some people it’s obviously a complete lack of social skills, a lack of awareness of other people’s circumstances. I know a very privileged young man who boasts and bigs himself up all the time. He’s not insecure but just has no life experience other than his privileged little bubble.

But, the whole point is that I don't think my DDs are bland and ordinary. I think they're far more than that

@peaceanddove

But, the whole point is that I don't think my DDs are bland and ordinary. I think they're far more than that

Fabulous but I bet that no one else thinks that . That’s the thing about social skills.

We'll obviously I don't expect everyone else to adore them those most do I'm their Mum so it's my job to adore them.

I actually think that people who are insecure interpret certain behaviours in others as showing off or boasting, when actually the person is just talking about something they are proud of. It's interesting!

I do find that interesting alice so do you think boasting or bragging doesn't actually exist?