To think that schools do too many "pay a pound to..." days?

[NewSwimmingMum]

It isn't an issue for us to pay £1 here and there for mufti, odd socks, Christmas jumper etc, although remembering is a different matter!

Am I wrong to think it might add unnecessary pressure to families who are struggling? There will have been 2 in October, 2 in November and then at least 1 in December.

I guess one good thing is that it is a little more anonymous now school asks us to donate via the online payment system-at least a parent can imply to child they have paid. But not sure they should have to.

See also, wear a specific colour day. Not great when I have a child who hates school and has a meltdown when she doesn't have that colour. I hate non uniform days.

We're in the 3rd week of term and so far we've had:
Odd socks
Themed dress up (the day before odd socks, I forgot)
Sponsored cycle for school's fundraising project (cheeky bastards put the suggested donation as £50 for each child on the payment system! I gave £10 for two)
Books of raffle tickets going home for Christmas PTA
(Final two days of half term were Halloween and book dress-up)

Then there's the "bring a cereal box" requests.
Then the reading records/ timestables/ spellings/ homework reminders
And the extra-curricular slots changing each half term

So much mental clutter and money/ resources to process.

Yes I agree, it’s also the organisation of it all (we’re a cashless society really.

YABU to use the word schools, when you are mean your chid/children's school. This Friday will be our first this school year.

@INeedtobealone

DS school in the last couple of weeks have done:

-non uniform with a donation of toys/games for Christmas fair
-non uniform with a donation of chocolate for tombola for Christmas fair

• decorate and fill a jam jar for the Christmas fair
• selling Children in Need merchandise
• selling poppies - minimum donation of 50p
• day where they can dress in Children in Need merchandise- £1
• they've also done selling Christmas cards/bags/tags/tea towels the kids have designed where cheapest thing is a pack of cards for £5.
• school photos are next week too.

I know none of this is compulsory, and for charity and PTA, and we can afford it all but it does feel like a lot and we only have one child.

Yes, we've either done this or have most of this coming up for our two.

A week or so ago it was £1 each for Wacky Hair Day and this week I've paid £1 each for CiN dress down, plus £3.50 each for the disco next week.

We have most of the list from the PP coming up before Christmas.

The worst part is half the time all the change stays in the school safe forever because with cashless schools no one goes to the bank anymore. We've got out of date pound coins that were collected "for charity" in our safe.

It's not part of anyone's job to take it and no one wants to do it.

I am with you on this one OP.

At my children's primary school, this got to ridiculous levels. In the end I spoke to the head teacher (along with other parents) and told them how annoyed we were with the relentless 'pay a pound to wear this ' days.

I think the message got through, because it has now reduced to virtually nothing.

Yes ours do it a lot as well and it’s not suggested it’s wear it for a pound and you have to pay cash which you hand to the teacher, I have 4 in school so works out very expensive

The environmental aspect bothers me a lot too. I know you don't have to buy something specially, but we know very many families will.

Yes, and as PP said, it's all the extra costs too. You pay £1 for the privilege of having had to go out and buy something spotty/Pudsey merchandise, so your child doesn't feel left out, or cakes or whatever assorted tat that won't fit them next year - then people say "Oh, but it's only £1".

All this whilst losing a day's value of the money you spent on your child's expensive uniform, which are supposedly there for the exact purpose of avoiding peer pressure and additional costs to 'fit in' - but it's for charity, eh....

Our DS has started Year 5 and school have begun planning trips in earnest - most of them costing around £20 - and usually with three weeks' or less notice. You 'simply' have to sign the consent form and.... pay them £20 online. We don't live in an affluent area at all. They're great trips, but I can only assume they haven't heard all of the latest news about the UC uplift being removed, Marcus Rashford and his campaign and noticed the prices of everything going up etc.

It obviously never crosses their minds kin the slightest that a lot of parents simply do not have a spare £20 in the family budget (multiplied if you have more than one child in the year/school) allocated to 'random last-minute trips'.

Oh I forgot as well my daughter has a school trip coming up and the letter said it expected all children to attend, and the cost was £30, how can they expect all children to attend, surely it’s a choice and some may not want to/be able to pay that much for a school trip,

@Spiceup

The worst part is half the time all the change stays in the school safe forever because with cashless schools no one goes to the bank anymore. We've got out of date pound coins that were collected "for charity" in our safe.

It's not part of anyone's job to take it and no one wants to do it.

I hope the school have made an equivalent donation to the charity concerned and not just kept the donations . Otherwise you should be aware that that if theft and the Charity Commission take it very seriously.

It’s fair enough for schools to ask for money that will go towards the school and directly benefit the children in it, but I don’t agree with them asking for money to go to external charities. Regardless of whether parents can afford it, it just seems morally wrong for pressure to be put on families to donate to charities that have no choice over and may not want to support, but have to otherwise their child gets left out. There should be a law against fundraising for charities in primary schools.

YANBU

We also do staff leavers' gifts with the names of the children whose families donated. It adds up to a lot and it's not fair to exclude those who can't participate

I know many people resent being asked for £1 donations or cakes to sell etc.
However, many parents don't realise what a limited budget many schools have, even in affluent areas. The money raised is often used to buy additional equipment for the school.
In my daughter's primary school some years ago now, each class teacher would have a 'wish list' of items which made a huge difference to the class- things like a camera (before everyone had cameras on their phones) or extra art supplies, books laminator sheets, educational toys playground equipment etc etc.
The funds would also help cover the cost of school outings for those children whose parents were unable to afford to make a contribution.
I fully understand that some parents genuinely struggle to afford the requested £1, but it always surprised me that there were so many parents who could clearly easily afford it, but whinged loudly about it.
Everyone loved the termly after school cake sales though

@LethargicActress

It’s fair enough for schools to ask for money that will go towards the school and directly benefit the children in it, but I don’t agree with them asking for money to go to external charities. Regardless of whether parents can afford it, it just seems morally wrong for pressure to be put on families to donate to charities that have no choice over and may not want to support, but have to otherwise their child gets left out. There should be a law against fundraising for charities in primary schools.

Not very charitable to only look after yourself though, is it?

Grandma's cat, spitting on teachers? And what's wrong with kids having 'the worst costume', you've got your priorities wrong. Kids love dressing up generally

The problem is if you don't partake in things like Children In Need or Comic Relief, parents complain you are not doing anything

@GrandmasCat when I said dress up I meant in general...to be honest this year we have had one odd sock day and that's it...no time or expenditure either.

@Whinge

I think schools are always going to upset someone, no matter how they approach it.

If they limit the dress up and Mufti days they get complaints that other schools are doing it, and why can't they.

If they have a 1 - 2 each term they get parents who can't afford it, or don't want to pay.

Well they could do it without asking for a donation. That solves both the issues you’ve listed.

@Spiceup

The worst part is half the time all the change stays in the school safe forever because with cashless schools no one goes to the bank anymore. We've got out of date pound coins that were collected "for charity" in our safe.

It's not part of anyone's job to take it and no one wants to do it.

Do you mean the donation is never made?!

A dress up day doesn't mean you need to go any buy materials and make a costume. There are always people looking to get rid of outfits, so a request on FB marketplace / freecycle / local community groups usually has several offers of help. Or if that's not possible, talk to the school. We have spare costumes / christmas jumpers, CIN T shirts that we would be happy to pass on.

Considering that PP said she had very little spare money OR time, that sounds like an awful lot of time to have to arrange it all. Plus, many people don't like having to keep asking strangers for help for a random problem that's just been sprung on them to solve.

I think part of the issue is that these decisions are made by the PTA - and those parents with the luxury of lots of spare time that enables them to join the PTA in the first place assume that all other parents are in the same position as they are.

@Spiceup

The worst part is half the time all the change stays in the school safe forever because with cashless schools no one goes to the bank anymore. We've got out of date pound coins that were collected "for charity" in our safe.

It's not part of anyone's job to take it and no one wants to do it.

This is so shocking to me. The schools accounts must look odd. Someone just needs to take it to the bank. It's not hard. It doesn't have to be in their job description.

my secondary school has asked (via the bank transfer credit system online for both of my children) for £20 per term per child for "tech supplies" £20 per term per child for "art supplies" and yesterday "£4 per child for mufti day this friday".
i am a single mum this is crazy.

if i said to the school "what is in the art supplies? I will get it myself" would they give me the list? methinks not.
it really makes me wonder where exactly that money goes. Imagine a class of 30 all giving £20 per term..... anyone can do the maths

I would rather much give to Charity than endless 'teacher gifts' ... yes, I know teachers do a great job but most professions have a blanket ban on accepting gifts so I never understand why teacher gifts are allowed? I never felt obliged to give a teacher gift ... a handwritten thank you card/letter seems so much more appropriate.

But regarding the charity donations, I had an issue with my DS's secondary school in that the total amount raised was never announced .. eventually after asking at class level, the school office etc I took it to the governors and was given a very complex explanation fact that it was totalled and divided up at the end of the year - to me that is wrong, if you are sending in £1 for Children in Need on a certain day then surely all that money goes to Children in Need ? I work for a charity and the rules are very strict.

However by then I had lost the will to carry on the discussion.

Spiceup
And why do I end up suspecting that the cash "change" does not get into the school safe but more likely ends up in some staff members purse/wallet.
who checks? no one i would guess.