If you're off with sick, is it crass to flood SM with pictures of what you're up to?

[MakeMineALarge1]

Just that really.

I work in a place that currently has a high incidents of stress and we have up to 20 people off with work related stress.

Now I get going for walks, out for lunch etc, can be great for you, but is it crass to put pictures on of all your weekends away, decorating your house and nights out?

Alcohol is a clinical depressant and makes stress worse. So no.
People do use alcohol (like food) to cope with stress but this is unhealthy and if they were off sick with stress they should be trying to break these habits not carrying on.

Totally agree. Socialising, dancing etc can all be good ways to relieve stress. That might involve a glass or two of wine, but not any more than that if you're trying to improve mental health. If someone is dependent on drinking all evening to feel ok, that is a real problem.

I don’t think it’s particularly sensible or sensitive to colleagues still at work. I think this is also evolution of our hunan tendency to judge people, whether judgment is reasonable or not. In the past it would have been a colleague or their relative or friend spotting the person off sick and then gossiping. Even with DIY the person can be spotted buying paint.

If there is a high level of sickness leave due to stress it suggests something wider issues

that the type of job is inherently stressful (life and death decisions like social work)

Stress as jobs are insecure or zero hours - need to impress to be kept on and given shifts
Due to individual managers or the structure (no supervision/constant monitoring)

Good managers will yo yo mitigate this stuff, though in the first two many be in the same position.

Tbh I think it’s actually better for people to post on SM when they are doing things like this while signed off with stress. It normalises the idea that you really don’t have to sit in a darkened room until you return to work. It will be helping other people who are off sick feel able to do things without fear that they are doing something wrong. We need to normalise mental illness and be open about. People pay lip service to that idea but, as seen on this thread, when it comes to it they are a) disbelieving of people who are struggling with their MH, accuse them (behind their backs of course) of being work shy and making it up and having ‘miraculous’ recoveries; and b) don’t actually care about their colleague feeling better, (which is why they don’t want to see the colleague happy on SM) they just want them back at work to lighten the load.

I think the inconvenient truth is we all know if you are well enough to socialise excessively you are well enough to go to work.

I was off for 2 months recently after some awful things happened at work and a general build up of a couple of years of horrendous times generally.
I'd tried to carry on working but simply lost it one afternoon. During these weeks, we'd already got two holidays booked which I was really worried about taking as I thought everyone would think I was taking the piss. - which made my mental health even worse!
Turned out those two breaks actually did me the world of good and everyone understood.
As someone upthread said, you're off with stress from work not life.

It’s not a clever thing to do, no. Legally you’re entitled to providing your stress is solely related to work, but you should probably be aware that it looks like you’re having a jolly at the expense of the company- although that may well be the intention of the company are treating their staff like shit, of course.

If someone is dependent on drinking all evening to feel ok, that is a real problem.

Interesting way to twist someone having cocktails on a night out…

*If the company

I was off for 5 months with stress and I don't think I posted at all, maybe a few photos of some lovely clouds when I was out for a walk. To be fair I barely left the house anyway and definitely wasn't in the mood for decorating etc either. In fact my house was definitely in a worse state while I was off that it usually is when I am working.

It's definitely not a bad thing to be out and about when you are off with stress, but I really couldn't do it. I wouldn't judge people trying to lift their mood but I don't think it's necessary to share that on SM.

That last one paragraph is a mess
Good managers will try and mitigate this stuff, though in the first two many many may be in the same position.

The post in question referred to "endless cocktails". I didn't interpret that as having a couple.

@JaniieJones

I think the inconvenient truth is we all know if you are well enough to socialise excessively you are well enough to go to work.

Well, no, because all jobs are different with different requirements and very few only require you to socialise excessively.

@CSJobseeker

The post in question referred to "endless cocktails". I didn't interpret that as having a couple.

Who did?

'Well, no, because all jobs are different with different requirements and very few only require you to socialise excessively.'

But it does indicate a level of wellness, no?

The original post by iliketeaagain that sparked the conversation about alcohol.

@JaniieJones

I think the inconvenient truth is we all know if you are well enough to socialise excessively you are well enough to go to work.

There' always one

@JaniieJones

I think the inconvenient truth is we all know if you are well enough to socialise excessively you are well enough to go to work.

Also if work is the cause of stress - surely once they went back to work they'd be stressed again? I don't see how people taking time off sick for it actually solves anything. I can see people doing it after a combination of major life events + work but the work alone is something else.

Again it's not 0-100. People commenting on those signed off going to the pub, shopping etc are obviously being unfair but that's different from going out every night etc etc. And as someone else said signing off just before a major sporting event and taking all the effort to follow each event which must involve a lot of planning and logistics.

Anyway social media is for judging. You can't tell people not to judge, If people didn't want to be judged then don't post on social media. The moment it's broadcasted it's ripe for judging so yes I will. If They don't want to be judged it's incumbent on them not to post, not on me to not see it.

I agree on the holiday, I went away for a week in the UK about 3 months after being off and it honestly moved me on a level in my recovery. Just being away from the house (which is also my place of work) for a break, a few walks and lunches out and time with my family really let the light in and stopped the panic attacks. Without that break i'm sure i would have been off longer. It's difficult being off with work place stress and still being in the place you were when it occurred. I mean you wouldn't turn up at the office every day if you were off sick, but I was effectively doing that as my office was now my house.

@JaniieJones

'Well, no, because all jobs are different with different requirements and very few only require you to socialise excessively.'

But it does indicate a level of wellness, no?

Is ‘a level of wellness’ what is stipulated for being able to work?

@CSJobseeker

The original post by iliketeaagain that sparked the conversation about alcohol.

That poster said endless. I asked who interpreted it as a couple?

Tbh, I have no objection to people doing whatever activity helps them relax when off sick with stress. Decorating, going for walks, seeing friends, whatever.

I also don't care what people post on social media. Social media is 99% bullshit, so I usually take the happy/perfect facade with a bucketful of salt.

Bit crass yes, and a solid way to create bad feeling amongst the colleagues still at work plugging their gaps.

Personally, I'd say, do what you want, but at least have the good sense to filter colleagues off your social media for a while at least.

'Also if work is the cause of stress - surely once they went back to work they'd be stressed again'

Work is stressful. It is finding strategies to cope that is key and if, say, someone isn't sleeping and is very teary they may not cope but if they are socialising excessively this does indicate an ability to function doesn't it.

I mean fine, go out partying whilst everyone else does your work just have some common sense and don't post incessantly or tell your colleagues (when you manage to attend a works social do).

Also to add for me personally I know my team - my judgement is based on their attitude towards work that I already know.
People can say 'don't judge' etc all they like but humans have behavioural patterns. Which you'd know if you spend a lot of time with them.
It's not like a court of law where strangers are deciding whether someone is guilty but even with my own family and friends for example I know who has form for certain things.

Work is stressful. It is finding strategies to cope that is key and if, say, someone isn't sleeping and is very teary they may not cope but if they are socialising excessively this does indicate an ability to function doesn't it.

such insight.