To argue that this should is not a suitable topic for the Girl Guides

[MovedByFanciesThatAreCurled]

Girlguiding is for girls, aged 10-14. So why then do they feel the need to promote this on their social media?

This week is #AceWeek - a time to raise awareness and understanding of the asexual community. So here’s a shout-out to all of our asexual volunteers and members – thank you for everything you do in Girlguiding.

The reference to ‘members’ is quite clear. What on earth were they thinking in making reference to young girls’ sex lives (or lack of them according to the focus of the Tweet). How, as an organisation, have they strayed so far? I have two boys in the Scouts/Beavers and if this came up on either of their social media pages I would pull them out. Why is it seen to be an acceptable for Girlguiding?!!

They def may disagree but heck I (as a parent) disagree with a hell of a lot they say my children need to know and how they need to learn too 🤷🏻‍♀️. I am my children’s main source of education on this topic, I also know their limitations at the ages they are for listening to me. As I repeat if it’s brought up in a safe environment that the leaders and children feel comfortable with them I don’t see the problem. I’d rather they openly discuss comfortably with peers and adults and be directed to more suitable resources than to shut down and be awkward with me. My 10/11 yr old will be a total different kettle of fish than my future 13/24 yr old.

@MovedByFanciesThatAreCurled

I really wouldn't take Mumsnet too seriously on issues like this. Almost by definition it is a dominated by a group of people with tediously heteronormative sexualities!

This is so condescending. I would have felt the same if the Tweet had thanked all of their heterosexual members. Discussion of sexual orientation has no place Scouting in my opinion.

Exactly, and you kind of prove my point!

That's because for the vast majority of kids and the adults they become they don't need reassurance that their sexuality is ok, because validation is all around them.

Sadly yet another example of organisations falling over themselves to appear politically correct. Young people are under enough pressure relating to sexuality and gender, without this being thrown in to the mix. They should be allowed to be kids, without having to navigate all this woke shit at such a young age. No doubt it will be fed to them at school etc anyway. And yes, agree that volunteers should not be expected to teach gender issues, for God’s sake, they have enough on their plates already what with risk assessments, safeguarding, etc etc!

YANBU if I had a daughter the last place I would want her to be would be girl guides - they have been stonewalled out of their minds, no care for girls, utter disregard for safeguarding girls , the whole organisation is a sh*t show and should be closed down immediately before some poor girl gets really badly hurt. There is going to be an Epstein/Savile sized scandal in the press, mark my words

And you can believe in whatever you want to believe. But the girl guides should not be about teaching children about contested beliefs.

My sexuality is a contested belief?

I worry for you, if you had a daughter?!!!!! I’m sorry but all the volunteers who forgo their time every week for our children but you’ve basically in that statement labelled them peadophiles. Shame on you!! The ladies and gents who look after my daughters at their respective brownie/guide/beaver/scout groups couldn’t be more caring and concerned for our younger folk, they truly only want the best for my girls.

@Laurap82

I worry for you, if you had a daughter?!!!!! I’m sorry but all the volunteers who forgo their time every week for our children but you’ve basically in that statement labelled them peadophiles. Shame on you!! The ladies and gents who look after my daughters at their respective brownie/guide/beaver/scout groups couldn’t be more caring and concerned for our younger folk, they truly only want the best for my girls.

I really haven’t. Get a grip.

@Clymene

And you can believe in whatever you want to believe. But the girl guides should not be about teaching children about contested beliefs.

Sorry, I didn't realise that my non-hetero sexuality is a "contested belief".

“Demisexuality”.
I’ve heard it all now.

I’m a leader of rainbows and brownies with 15 years experience and have never come across any of the issues raised here. We genuinely do craft, play games and messy experiments. I find it abhorrent the amount of people calling me and my fellow volunteers pedophiles, it’s really mind blowing. Lots of concerns over something that’s not actually happening - we’ve never had any sex Ed style evenings or even questions. This stuff is all aimed at the older volunteers and rangers. My groups biggest issue is whether they want to be unicorns or mermaids!

@Coronawireless

“Demisexuality”. I’ve heard it all now.

IKR? 20 years ago queer was a slur and people who used that term usually followed it up by kicking 7 shades of shit out of their poor victim. Now you express pretty normal discernment in your choice of sexual partner and you get to call yourself queer and wear a pretty little flag. 😕

Honestly its fucking ridiculous, its important to teach kids about consent and boundaries, but let them be kids. Its not appropriate or healthy for pre pubescent and early teens to have to feel they need to focus on this so much.

IKR? 20 years ago queer was a slur and people who used that term usually followed it up by kicking 7 shades of shit out of their poor victim. Now you express pretty normal discernment in your choice of sexual partner and you get to call yourself queer and wear a pretty little flag. 😕

That's not what demisexuality is. HTH.

If you want guides to know that it's ok if you don't feel sexuality is an important part of your life, the best thing to do is to give them a space where people aren't blithering on about sex all the time?

Firstly, their social media isn't targeting 10 year olds, it is targeting older members plus guides/brownies/rainbows parents.
Secondly by educating about the Ace community it doesn't mean it is making the children think about their own sexuality, it is making them aware that some people are asexual.
Thirdly, at the age of 13/14 where some of these children may start experiencing feelings towards the same gender or the other gender or both gendees, some may not, for some this is because they aren't yet at that "stage" but for others it is because they may be a asexual and this will help them see they aren't alone.

@iguanadonna

If you want guides to know that it's ok if you don't feel sexuality is an important part of your life, the best thing to do is to give them a space where people aren't blithering on about sex all the time?

Several people have said how when we group up, sexuality wasn't discussed. It caused many of us mental health problems.

I give up! my messages are not reacting with the people I intend them for. I’m finding it really hard to follow the thread and react to it too. I don’t think it’s a bad thing, I’m personally happy with how my girls beavers/Cubs/brownies and guides groups handle their interactions with my children and I’m sure they will handle any sensitive topics i the manner intended

The Tavistock official guidance on how the NHS should proceed is ‘watchful waiting’ and advise against socially transitioning kids

@BloodinGutters what is your source for this? I don’t believe this is Tavi’s official guidance at all..

@jb7445

My husband is asexual and from a very reserved, conservative family who don't discuss these things. Maybe if he had been told that how he felt was normal as a young teen he wouldn't be covered in self harm scars all over his arms, legs and torso. Asexuality is probably the least discussed and least understood sexuality and I cannot see what is wrong with letting teens know that there isn't something wrong with them if they identify that way.

Im sorry that happened to him. My own confusion and sadnesses manifested as a severe eating disorder and self harm. ♥️

I feel I need to clarify my question. When I ask how you "decide" who to have sex with, as an 'asexual who has sex', are they male or female?

As in, are you hetero-asexual, homo-asexual or bi-asexual?
This is why I'm confused (in the case of those who have sex - the 'no sex at all' group I understand completely) - how can it be an orientation rather than a preference, when it must be (in the case of asexuals-who-have-sex) occurring concurrently with the more "usual" orientations? Iyswim?

YANBU - thisisbullshit

Not wanting to have sex unless you're romantically involved with someone isn't a sexuality, it's a preference.

God this obsessive need to label every single interest and quirk and fit yourself into ever smaller boxes is just infuriating.

Only has sex with women
Only has sex with men
Has sex with both men and women in short term relationships
Only sex in very short term hook up situations
Only has sex within the context of long term relationships
Entirely celibate and feels zero sexual attraction to anyone

That's a list of ways you could have described my sexual interest at various times in my life. Thankfully, I've never felt the need to shove myself into a box

It's absolutely not appropriate. Why does everyone's sexual orientation have to be worn like a badge? I fear for the future of children if this is the kind of agenda that is being pushed. Let them.have a childhood fgs!!

@Laurap82

I give up! my messages are not reacting with the people I intend them for. I’m finding it really hard to follow the thread and react to it too. I don’t think it’s a bad thing, I’m personally happy with how my girls beavers/Cubs/brownies and guides groups handle their interactions with my children and I’m sure they will handle any sensitive topics i the manner intended

You put a lot of faith in people who have not experienced rigorous safeguarding and who volunteer for a organisation who takes its safeguarding advice from a wholly dubious source. I am absolutely positive that the majority of leaders lead with integrity and with the best intentions. However, in my opinion tweets like this encourage the association between discussing sexual orientation and guiding - which I think is problematic for all concerned - even the most well intentioned. My post was not about asexuality (although the thread seems to have veered off in that direction). It was about the fact that the Guiding association was tweeting anything to do with sexual orientation at all. Why? Why not just thank their volunteers and members. Then surely everyone is covered.

Not wanting to have sex unless you're romantically involved with someone isn't a sexuality, it's a preference.

Once again, it's not about who you have sex with.

Demi sexuality is about not being attracted to someone unless you know them well.

People are attracted to someone they don't know all the time otherwise the Chippendales/Dreamboys would not be a thing, Magic Mike would not have been a popular film, there would not have been a huge thread on here recently about Adam Driver, nobody would be called a sex symbol etc.

I thought Chippendales was a joke.