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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not travel around on busses 5 days post section with baby?

296 replies

TrappedWindArse · 30/10/2021 11:19

I had a section Tuesday morning and have not long arrived home with baby (see previous post about being stuck on the postnatal ward after a hemmorage, no sleep, annoying visitors - yay)

Midwife came round yesterday to check in with us and said I have to take baby into the nearest clinic tomorrow (Sunday) for my day 5 post birth check, to weigh baby and remove my dressing.

The problem is it's 3.5 miles away and I don't drive. I'm exhausted, anaemic and still not able to walk very far. I'd need to use public transport and to be completely honest I'm just not up to going anywhere yet let alone miles away with baby in a sling.

I remember these checks being done at home with my other children but apparently that has changed. Possibly because it falls on a Sunday? I don't know.

Anyway, WIBU to say I'm sorry i just can't do that and ask for somebody to come to us instead? I know the midwives are very over stretched at the minute but I genuinely feel it will hinder my already slow recovery.

Will that go against me somehow and make me look negligent for not complying?

I'm a bit stressed.

OP posts:
Platax · 31/10/2021 11:44

@TatianaBis

Congestion charge is only for vehicles that don’t meet ULEZ emission standards.
Not quite. Until last week, you would be exempt with a vehicle that met Euro 6 standards (petrol and diesel), that emit no more than 75g/km of CO2 and have a minimum 20 mile zero emission capable range. However, that's changed so that now it only applies to battery, electric or hydrogen fuel cell vehicles - and the discount will go completely at the end of 2025.
Platax · 31/10/2021 11:48

@RussianSpy101

I don’t see why you can’t? I walked to my 10 day appointment with my 2 older DC post c section. It was about 2 miles. Take the pram and walk it.
I'd put money on it being nowhere near two miles. And 10 days after C section is a lot different from 5.
OhWhyNot · 31/10/2021 11:56

I’m glad to read the update

Ridiculous that anyone thought you should make your own way there regardless of how you did you absolutely should be resting you have been through a terrible time

I didn’t drive when I had ds (and on my own) I love in London it wasn’t necessary for me to I managed fine. A car is not a necessity especially when you have good transport links

Hope you are getting lots of rest this time is so special enjoy ☺️

Sackofnickles · 31/10/2021 12:12

Yanbu

I had to go in 5 days post section in July and it was awful. Wish I'd said no.

impossiblypossibly · 31/10/2021 12:42

@Sackofnickles

Yanbu

I had to go in 5 days post section in July and it was awful. Wish I'd said no.

I went to the midwife clinic at day 2 and day 5 post section. Day 2 appointment was less than 48hours after operation, could really have done without it. Only that my friend was able to give me a lift I went, my partner was doing school run at the time. Was fine to attend by day 5. Previous child (pre covid) day 5 was a clinic visit too. Strangely though I've since had two health visitor home visits at week 2 and 4, another one in a few days for week 6
takenforgrantednana · 31/10/2021 12:55

@impossiblypossibly why on earth where you going anywhere? it was for your midwife to come to you esp so soon after your c section

TurquoiseDragon · 31/10/2021 13:10

@thatyouleaveinspace

You can't drive for six weeks after section
Youu can drive when a) you feel well enough, and b) your doctor is okay with it. That's all that my insurance required.
Grapewrath · 31/10/2021 13:14

Op you’ve just had major surgery of course you need to make sure your needs are met.
Ignore the posters who rode on a donkey to pick up their bounty pack, dragging their placenta behind them.
Explain your situation and it might be possible to have a FaceTime consultation with any concerns followed up by a home visit

shas19 · 31/10/2021 13:24

No 5 days is ridiculous, I've always been up and about after my sections but never on public transport. Ask if the visit can be done at home which they usually are, I've never travelled for a midwife appointment for these things.

whynotwhatknot · 31/10/2021 13:25

noone needs car in london sorry but you dont-i was born and lived there till i was 15 we went everywhere by tube or bus the parking even back then was awful

now theres congestion daily charges its just not worth it

TurquoiseDragon · 31/10/2021 13:30

[quote RussianSpy101]@Saoirse82 or just not a fucking martyr like some here who think for some reason they can’t walk for 87 days after having a baby 😂😂
There’s literally thousands of women having a c section every single day. Life goes on as normal. I genuinely do not understand the threads that always pop up - I can’t attend my sisters wedding 4 weeks after my baby. Honestly, people need to get a grip.[/quote]
I have a stupidly high pain threshhold, plus a very straightforward ELCS. I was fine walking a few days later.

However, other women have complications, injuries, etc, that mean it's not straightforward, and that leave them not being able to walk so soon after.

Even a vaginal birth can leave women with complications, injuries, etc, that mean they can't just get up and walk too easily.

You are behaving like a wazzock, with your "I'm alright, jack so you should be, too" attitude.

takenforgrantednana · 31/10/2021 13:32

@Grapewrath

Op you’ve just had major surgery of course you need to make sure your needs are met. Ignore the posters who rode on a donkey to pick up their bounty pack, dragging their placenta behind them. Explain your situation and it might be possible to have a FaceTime consultation with any concerns followed up by a home visit
dont be silly, this isnt a facetime/zoom thing, it needs the wounds checking for a start. and mum needs checking over carefully, all to often things get hidden, a smile or a laugh doesnt mean mum is doing well, but would be missed on a video call but face to face proper care is needed, we can all smile at the right time and make sure the box of tissues youve just used to dry the tears are out of shot
TatianaBis · 31/10/2021 14:42

@Platax

See my following post @21.54

Davygran · 31/10/2021 17:38

@Guiltypleasures001

No and no Op can't drive she's not allowed and they should come to her They wouldn't expect a bloke to do all this after major surgery Stand your ground op And congratulations
Exactly this! I agree with you 100%
Weareallvirgins · 31/10/2021 17:41

Can you partner while on paternity take you?

Fluffmum · 31/10/2021 17:41

I walked 3 miles to catch a train 9 days after csection and I thought my insides were going to fall out. Tell them no.

FortVictoria · 31/10/2021 17:49

@PinkiOcelot

They can’t expect you to travel on public transport 5 days post caesarean miles away. Fair enough if you could drive, but no.
Even if OP could drive, the advice is not to drive for six weeks after a C section.
SparklingPinot · 31/10/2021 17:50

Oh hell no! I had a section and was seen at home until well after this. Plus even if you did drive you wouldn’t / shouldn’t be driving this soon after a section. Tell them they need to come out to you. Absolutely not being unreasonable at all

pollymere · 31/10/2021 17:52

Mine just turned up at the house on the Sunday. Explain you are still recovering and are in no fit state to go out.

OhWhyNot · 31/10/2021 17:56

People seem to forget that this is major surgery. Op also suffered from having a haemorrhage after that’s a terrible experience to go through. Op should be resting as much as she can so her body can mend

Hope all is ok. And many congratulations oh to be in those first few fuzzy weeks of wonderment 🥰

HareHare · 31/10/2021 18:05

RE: 1 because childbirth is free on the NHS there has been a mantra that wimmin should be grateful - even when standards are sub-optimal; and

Free at the point of care but not free we pay for it

I wonder even if you did drive if your insurance would be valid so this policy relies on people having someone to take them and even then its too much to expect

Gilld69 · 31/10/2021 18:08

wow, I can't believe they expected you yo do that, I'm glad you said no because I bet there's lots of women who'd of said ok and felt awful going, I've had 3 sections which were all great but no way would I be trapsing on and off buses , good on you and congratulations x

Shirls22 · 31/10/2021 18:09

As an ex midwife I would be saying 5 days post CS it would be perfectly reasonable to ask for a home visit

Suzanne999 · 31/10/2021 18:18

5 days after giving birth?? And a C section? Are they mad. My daughter was born on a Friday and about 9 am on Monday I can remember thinking I’m not going to die. Haemorrhage and terrible care by hospital staff ( apart from a student dr and HCA) so NO, do not go travelling around on buses.
Midwife wants to check you they can get to your house to do it. Stand your ground, I know NHS is stretched with Covid, short staffed etc. but overdo it now and you’ll pay for it in fatigue later on ( I did)

And congratulations on your baby. 🌟

takenforgrantednana · 31/10/2021 18:21

@Shirls22

As an ex midwife I would be saying 5 days post CS it would be perfectly reasonable to ask for a home visit
@Shirls22 and the rest! until you are handed over to the health visitor!
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