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AIBU?

Changed nappy on restaurant table

251 replies

Badlytornfrube · 28/10/2021 08:17

I went to an independent pizza place for lunch with a friend. Her 4 month old did a poo. The restaurant only had one tiny toilet with no changing space. My friend used the empty table next to us to change her baby. I was mortified and other customers watched us, I think one was filming us surreptitiously. Am I wrong not to want to go to lunch with her again. Fwiw I have 3 small children and I would have changed them outside.

YABU: she had nowhere else to change the baby
YANBU: that was a disgusting thing to do

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

1764 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
7%
You are NOT being unreasonable
93%
TheFairyCaravan · 28/10/2021 09:34

If I had been in that restaurant eating my lunch I would have packed up and left. I wouldn’t have paid either. It’s utterly disgusting to change ant nappy on a table where someone is going to eat, or near those who are eating. I guess she didn’t wash her hands after, either?

Everyone in this scenario is out of order. Your friend for doing it, you for not speaking up and the staff for not putting a stop to it.

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JudgeJ · 28/10/2021 09:34

@Sceptre86

Outside, where? She could have gone back to her car and changed baby there I suppose. Another option would have been to change baby in a chair or other seating. Next time I would pick somewhere child friendly.

Using a chair in a restaurant is just as disgusting as using a table, does she do this in her own home? Such entitlement, my child is the centre of everyone's universe.
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SleepingStandingUp · 28/10/2021 09:34

She was bu

But more horrified at the people suggesting lying a 4 month old baby, even on a changing mat, on a floor where people have dribble piss and walked in all sorts of crap. That is the kind of parenting I'd judge.

Ime you do it on your lap in the loo or you do it in the pushchair and lie them flat.

I've changed a standing up poo in a library doorway because it was raining and they refused access to the loo but it was by far less stinky that leaving him in it until wed finished and it was a ventilating doorway rather than a narrow access doorway.

Do you think she was trying to make a point op? That she felt they should cater for her? Do they have high chairs and a kids menu?

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Sceptre86 · 28/10/2021 09:39

@Badlytornfrube I would have taken the pram to the loo and changed baby there. If it was a one off and she was flustered I would let it go. If she had no issues with it and would likely do it again I would probably pipe up.

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Gonnagetgoing · 28/10/2021 09:39

@TheFairyCaravan

If I had been in that restaurant eating my lunch I would have packed up and left. I wouldn’t have paid either. It’s utterly disgusting to change ant nappy on a table where someone is going to eat, or near those who are eating. I guess she didn’t wash her hands after, either?

Everyone in this scenario is out of order. Your friend for doing it, you for not speaking up and the staff for not putting a stop to it.

But the staff if they're not very assertive etc - after Covid, not being open etc probably don't want to speak up to offend the customer changing there.

It's disgusting though all round and I agree everyone is out of order here.
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mustlovegin · 28/10/2021 09:39

That's gross, who does this?

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Witchinthedales · 28/10/2021 09:41

🤢🤢🤢🤢

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DameMaureen · 28/10/2021 09:41

Is it her first child ?

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SleepingStandingUp · 28/10/2021 09:41

that footage and it is still footage of a baby's genitals unless she was making an elaborate show of it, I can't see someone sitting at another tae would have much of a view of babys genitals, they're presumably filming Mom not zoning in to get penis shots.

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blink18two · 28/10/2021 09:42

@User135792468

I wouldn’t have gone outside. I would have positioned myself next to the toilet and done it in my pram. On a table is just gross.

Yes, in pram is what I would have done
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LaceySleeve · 28/10/2021 09:43

The thing to do in these situations is to put a large muslin cloth or roll up carry changing mat in the pram under baby, wheel them to the toilet and change them there. The table is ill mannered.

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SleepyMathematician · 28/10/2021 09:46

And people pontificate about how they won’t go into a cafe where there’s a dog sat on the floor!

This is utterly grim. The thought that I might be eating my lunch at a table where a nappy has just been changed 🤮

Who on earth are the 8% who think it’s ok?

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Wallabyone · 28/10/2021 09:59

It's disgusting, and I have a very entitled friend who has done the same. I have changed a much bigger baby than a four month old on my lap in a loo. I've changed all my children in the boot of my car on a change mat, and the same in the pram in a quiet corner with no other options. The baby will be cold for ten seconds.

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TheFairyCaravan · 28/10/2021 09:59

But the staff if they're not very assertive etc - after Covid, not being open etc probably don't want to speak up to offend the customer changing there.

They have two choices really. Either offend the person changing a shitty nappy on a table or offend the rest of the people in there, trying to eat their lunch, by not speaking up. I know which one I’d choose.

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User310 · 28/10/2021 10:03

Couldn’t she have just change the baby in the prom with the hood up or on her lap, still unpleasant when people are eating but better than on a restaurant table!

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Notaroadrunner · 28/10/2021 10:05

@TheFairyCaravan

If I had been in that restaurant eating my lunch I would have packed up and left. I wouldn’t have paid either. It’s utterly disgusting to change ant nappy on a table where someone is going to eat, or near those who are eating. I guess she didn’t wash her hands after, either?

Everyone in this scenario is out of order. Your friend for doing it, you for not speaking up and the staff for not putting a stop to it.

I agree. It's just disgusting. @Badlytornfrube I'd decline ever meeting up with her again until the child is at least 5. I imagine she's the type who would think nothing of producing a portable potty in a restaurant and allowing the child to shit beside other diners. Gross!
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FreedomFaith · 28/10/2021 10:06

@Badlytornfrube

Interesting that at least 15 people think I am being unreasonable.

Just means they are vile too.
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starrynight87 · 28/10/2021 10:07

Oh my god, horrendous. Would have complained.

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ifonly4 · 28/10/2021 10:07

Revolting changing on a table, and not exactly pleasant for other diners. I'd have googled nearest changing room and shot off there myself. If not, certainly in the pram outside.

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Puzzledandpissedoff · 28/10/2021 10:08

Interesting that at least 15 people think I am being unreasonable

It's far more than that now Hmm

Interesting that none of them have chosen to post why you're BU - perhaps the type who find this kind of thing acceptable struggle to make a coherent point?

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Dollywilde · 28/10/2021 10:09

Another who thinks she should have changed baby on her lap in the loo. It's a useful skill to have and I've done it stacks of times when a baby change isn't available. Now slightly harder with a chunky 15 month old but a breeze when she was 4 months!

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furbabymama87 · 28/10/2021 10:09

I've changed nappies on my knee in the toilet cubicle if there's no proper baby change. There's no excuse to do it on a restaurant table.

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caringcarer · 28/10/2021 10:20

That is disgusting. I am surprised other diners did not complain. I would not stay sitting with someone who did that. I would leave them to it.

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Gonnagetgoing · 28/10/2021 10:25

@Notaroadrunner - my DB and SIL have portable potties but only used e.g. in my or my DM's houses when he was potty training or in a place with no available toilet - certainly not a building.

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Viviennemary · 28/10/2021 10:26

Disgusting. I'm surprised one of the staff didn't say something. I couldn't be friends with a person who thinks that is in any way acceptable behaviour. Is she usually so unaware.

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