To have left a 23year old at 3am away from home?

[MinibusLift]

I've nc as outing.

I have a minibus, for the price of the fuel and a Premier Inn room I am happy to collect my children and their friends and drop them at festivals/night clubs/stadiums etc.

I've been doing this for a few years before covid and have started again now never had an issue, occasionally haven't picked everyone I dropped off as they have decided not to come home.

On Friday I picked up 12, with my DD the youngest at 18 and then going up to 25.
I don't get involved in the organising just tell my children how much it will cost (£90 this time) and then I pick them up, drop them where they want to go and then pick them all back up at a pre agreed time. I, and my children are very clear that I won't hang around, like a pre booked taxi I leave at a set time.

Saturday morning 3am I go to pick them all up, one of mine had already texted to say he was staying in the city so I was expecting 11, but only 10 arrive.

I'm told *Alan has decided to stay with my son as he isn't ready to go home, apparently his sister tried to convince him but you can't argue with drunk people.

So I take the 10 back (about 2hours drive) and drop them home. At 8am I am woken up by Alan's mum asking why the fuck I'd left her son in the city and that he is stuck 2 hours from home with no money and needs to be at work at 10am and demanding I go and pick him up, finishing that no mother should leave someone else's son behind.

Was IBU to leave him?

(Before someone asks why I do it I'm studying and a quiet hotel room followed by a couple of hours of silent sleep in a bed on my own more than makes up for the driving)

@Learningatmyownpace

I’d refuse to take Alan ever again when he asks (and he will) and I’d also be wondering why his sister hasn’t told their Mum what really happened.

In fairness, it's not Alan's fault his mum is bonkers

A 23 yo knows their own mind. Legally an adult. Wtf does his mum expect you to take responsibility?

His moms hilarious, bless her

I hope Alan enjoyed his escapade as I can't see him being allowed on the next night out.

Is your minibus licensed and insured for hire & reward?

It's Alan's own fault. Surely the sister has told her mum that?

Alan is an adult and if he chose to go off somewhere else that's on him. Did the mum expect you to hunt him down? Or wait until he could be bothered to turn up? But if he said he wasn't coming back why would he then later turn up at the pre arranged place? I would also guess the others who did get there on time also wouldn't want to hang around for hours either

But I believe I'd be covered on a normal insurance policy as it is not for profit.'

It is for profit - the fact that you spend the profit on a premier inn is irrelevant. Seriously, please check with your insurance co. 'I believe' really isn't good enough. Find out for certain.

My, has Alan got some explaining to do when his mum gets hold of him!

Never mind, Alan’s mummy will have called work and told them he was poorly.

His mother should drive him herself next time! Would she have done the same to a taxi company?

Fucking hell, he’s a grown 23 year old man, not a 13 year olds.

I had a baby and a mortgage at that age, I certainly didn’t have my parents bollocking someone for not giving me a lift.

Plus, I had the life skills long before then not to get stuck on a night out when I had work the next day, and the foresight to carry a credit card incase something stupid like that was to happen.

Alan and his mum are a pair of twats.

He’s a man, he refused his lift, his problem and his mum infantilising him won’t help

There was a set time. He missed it. So he missed the bus. That's his problem.

Maybe Alan's Mummy should take him and bring him back next time.
At 23 he was informed of the arrangements.. he was the one who changed them... she needs to speak firmly to her child.
You are being more than kind/accommodating in providing this service for them. Well done.

Oh crikey. It sound like Alan pulled and then realised at 8am that it wasn't a great idea and was stuck. No idea why his mum is getting involved though. My mum had no involvement in my nightlife antics at 23 🤣

His mother is way over-involved and needs to let her 23 year old (!!!) make their mistakes. Given this guy clearly flaked on his lift arrangement on a night out, she's probably the one holding down his job/life.

@PackedintheUK

WTF is gong on at home that "a quiet hotel room followed by a couple of hours of silent sleep in a bed on my own" is better than a full night in your own bed?

I also had thoughts on this.

Why are you driving for 2 hours at 3am (and this is the return leg of the journey - what time did you set off?) for a few hours kip in a crappy hotel and petrol money?

I assume you then dropped them all at their respective homes?

As a one off its a nice gesture, as a regular thing, it's odd.

Alan's mum is a nut nut and Alan is an adult and old enough to look after himself.

Sorry I mean what time did you leave to drive the 2 hours to take them to wherever you took them?

I am Alan’s mum.

23? That's absolutely hilarious! His mother is nuts.

Alan's mum needs to cut the umbilical cord.

@Iamacatslave

I am Alan’s mum.

Then can you explain why you are crazy...

I think the people telling the OP she's odd to be happy to use her minibus to give young people lifts (on her terms) are odd.

He's 23, there was an agreement that he be at a certain time at a certain place if he wanted a ride home. He wasn't there, so he broke that contract. You have no duty of care for a 23 year old.

I really hope his Mum is on here and reads the comments, I know she must be worried but she really needs to let him take responsibility for his own mistakes.