To have left a 23year old at 3am away from home?

[MinibusLift]

I've nc as outing.

I have a minibus, for the price of the fuel and a Premier Inn room I am happy to collect my children and their friends and drop them at festivals/night clubs/stadiums etc.

I've been doing this for a few years before covid and have started again now never had an issue, occasionally haven't picked everyone I dropped off as they have decided not to come home.

On Friday I picked up 12, with my DD the youngest at 18 and then going up to 25.
I don't get involved in the organising just tell my children how much it will cost (£90 this time) and then I pick them up, drop them where they want to go and then pick them all back up at a pre agreed time. I, and my children are very clear that I won't hang around, like a pre booked taxi I leave at a set time.

Saturday morning 3am I go to pick them all up, one of mine had already texted to say he was staying in the city so I was expecting 11, but only 10 arrive.

I'm told *Alan has decided to stay with my son as he isn't ready to go home, apparently his sister tried to convince him but you can't argue with drunk people.

So I take the 10 back (about 2hours drive) and drop them home. At 8am I am woken up by Alan's mum asking why the fuck I'd left her son in the city and that he is stuck 2 hours from home with no money and needs to be at work at 10am and demanding I go and pick him up, finishing that no mother should leave someone else's son behind.

Was IBU to leave him?

(Before someone asks why I do it I'm studying and a quiet hotel room followed by a couple of hours of silent sleep in a bed on my own more than makes up for the driving)

Just read this thread and thought to myself I was married, working and paying a mortgage at 23!!! Did a my partying and staying out from 18-23 was considered adult enough to work from 16 and to be able to get myself to/from wherever I needed to go. My 23 year old would be mortified if I rang their friends mum to complain about lack of a lift but then they live away from home like an adult as well🤔

This is tragic, Alan definitely is a mummy’s boy, anyway.

I can’t imagine being 23 and blaming a friend’s mum for me deciding not to go home. If Alan was 17/18 then there might, arguably, be a point to argue (although I’d still say if you’re old enough to be drinking you’re old enough to understand the consequences of not showing up for a taxi home, essentially). At 23, it’s a joke. His mum should be going ballistic at him for being such an idiot.

Unfortunately, I don’t think this will be the last time Alan has to ring mummy to save the day…

is his surname Partridge?

@MinibusLift

Seen son, does appear that Alan, after a phone call from his mum, implied I wasn't there to pick him up, and used the fact he was with my son as proof that I'd left them in the city, however not sure how this story held up as I dropped his sister home.

Anyway haven't heard anything else from his mum, have told son that if I take Alan in the future he needs to sign a waiver.

and bring his own clean pants ironed by mummy

All I can think of is this sketch of his froends at 3am :

What else could you have done anyway though? He wasn’t there and said he wasn’t coming back? Were you supposed to go and find him, all the others in the bus, and what? Kidnap him?

@Unmerited

What else could you have done anyway though? He wasn’t there and said he wasn’t coming back? Were you supposed to go and find him, all the others in the bus, and what? Kidnap him?

Alan would have undone the harness on his Britax 123 and escaped

@jamandmarmalade She’d have needed a bag of rice cakes to keep him distracted.

and those clean spare pants

@Fridafever

Mumsnet needs a separate board devoted to people worrying about other people’s insurance.

Your service sounds amazing OP . If I was Alan's sister and my mother called you I would be furious at her for jeopardising future lifts for me.

YANBU Alan has probably lied to his mum about why he missed the lift….doesn’t want to admit he was too drunk, with someone etc to make mum feel sorry for him and go and collect him. Mum has forgotten he is 23!!!!

As suspected Alan told his mum a porky in order to wangle a lift. He knows what he's doing.

@meganorks

Alan's mum is just pissed off that she got a call at 8 in the morning and she is going to have to pick him up or pay for his cab. Ignore her

@meganorks

Alan's mum didn't "have" to do either of those things

Mortified for Alan's mother, what a twat.

You sound like a very kind mum, what a nice thing you do for them all.

Alan sounds like a bit of a tit for that matter, ringing his mother🙄

You sound brilliant OP! And what a great arrangement. I wish my dcs were lucky enough to have someone like you to ferry them.

Definitely make the boy sign a waiver if there's a next time!

@MinibusLift

Seen son, does appear that Alan, after a phone call from his mum, implied I wasn't there to pick him up, and used the fact he was with my son as proof that I'd left them in the city, however not sure how this story held up as I dropped his sister home.

Anyway haven't heard anything else from his mum, have told son that if I take Alan in the future he needs to sign a waiver.

Ah-the mistake of completely believing her son!

"Ah Mummy the nasty lady left me behind & I was only a little bit late!"

What a porker Alan is !!

@jamandmarmalade

and those clean spare pants

🤣🤣

@ titchy
She has insurance!

I hope Alan's mum wrote a note to his boss the following morning to get him excused from his job.

I am really quite shocked at the number of people criticizing the kindness of the OP.
She is doing something very nice for her children and their friends.
I am really quite shocked at the bossy attitude about taxi tax insurance etc. She has already stated that she has the correct insurance.
You don't pay tax on expenses!
You are doing a very kind thing OP!

@MinibusLift

Seen son, does appear that Alan, after a phone call from his mum, implied I wasn't there to pick him up, and used the fact he was with my son as proof that I'd left them in the city, however not sure how this story held up as I dropped his sister home.

Anyway haven't heard anything else from his mum, have told son that if I take Alan in the future he needs to sign a waiver.

Don't be silly OP. Alan's mummy needs to sign the waiver. When she's finished washing Alan's pants.

@Glostergull

Actually as the Law stands he is totally responsible and chose to stay with your son. if she tried to take you to court you can point out in evidence (I assume your son will corroborate that this is correct) that. 1. he chose to stay there of his own free will.

1. you do it only as a favour and are not paid for it.
2. they are only paying basic expenses. for the cost of hire and fuel. for two trips for whoever arrives on time. and you are not responsible for going around to wake them. take action if they are too drunk to stand or wipe up their sick etc.
3. If she isn't happy. She should drive the bus and not rely on you for all their misdeeds.

OMG - it's going to Court now?

Will Alan's pants be displayed in an evidence bag?

Alan's mum .. at 23 FFS .. I thought I was a helicopter mum but she needs to wind it in