To think it Is it a feasible proposal that a school might consider allowing a currently pregnant Year 12 the opportunity to repeat year 12 next yeara currently pregnant currently pregnant year 12

[redhilary]

I have reposted this thread from chat due to limited traffic.

Is it a feasible proposal that a school might consider allowing a currently pregnant year 12 girl the opportunity to repeat Year 12 next year.

do get the feeling here though that people want me to Crash and burn and end up in a sorry state

No, I don’t think so.

I think that is another example of how wildly you are misjudging things.

Rambling and going of topic is a characteristic of either a scrambled mind, or of someone who is Neuro- Diverse in their make up.

Yes, you do seem to use 10 words when one would do and often go off the point. I think you sometimes think what you have written is funny in some way but it looks, forgive me, increasingly desperate.

Why on earth are you prepared to let your family 'go down with The Titanic'?

It really isn't a normal reaction.

Wake up and smell the coffee and don't neglect your own girls as the time you give to this teenager will be taken from them.

Rather than hoping you 'crash and burn'. posters are hoping you will leave off this course of action and protect yourself and your own family.

As a side note, you do seem to have a lot of excuses for everything.

@redhilary

Rambling and going of topic is a characteristic of either a scrambled mind, or of someone who is Neuro- Diverse in their make up.

Whatever the reason, someone who incessantly rambles and strays off topic, won’t be helpful to this child as you are repeatedly missing the point.

You won’t be the saviour of this girl and if you’re not careful, you’ll be her downfall.

Good luck. By the sounds of it, you’re really going to need it.

One thing that might be helpful albeit that at this point I don’t know why I’m bothering to suggest it, would be to try and actually challenge the GD’s target of being in full time education by 2022. I realise that you’ll likely regard the concept of challenging the target as discriminatory hatred but you’re not doing her, or her neurodiversity, any favours by trying to force a square peg into a round hole.

If GD was so set on this target then getting pregnant was an incredibly silly thing to do. It’s done now and there’s no going back but her target now has to change, because the baby won’t. You can’t force it to fit in with your GD’s needs, as you’re doing with everything else. Your GD’s life has to change to fit in with it.

It would be kinder if you were trying to prepare her for this adjustment, and help her get ready to be a parent. It may even in the long run be that she thanks you for allowing her breathing room to enjoy being a parent. Whereas trying to outsource all of the baby’s needs to keep it away from its mother is a form of deprivation that she may really resent you for in years to come.

She can resume schooling at any time. She can be this newborn’s mother now, only. She’s not going to enter into a foregone conclusion of Dickensian misery if she adjusts her timeline a bit.

trying to outsource all of the baby’s needs to keep it away from its mother is a form of deprivation that she may really resent you for in years to come

Hugely important point here.

Finally, I am not a mythical character who has been lurking about Mumsnet for years under different pseudonyms, enquiring about just a single topic.

I never said you were mythical. As for the other stuff, stop gaslighting me. I'm not going to out you on this thread but you and I both know I am not wrong.

Hundreds, I mean literally hundreds and hundreds of posts containing the word 'grammar' have been written by you under 4 different user names going back to 2014 and it's likely there are other other names I haven't spotted. You have a 'style' that is very easy to identify as well as a pretty constant family backstory that you carry with you from user name to user name, changing minor details for anonymity, the sexes and ages of your DC for a start.

Personally I don't believe you have two DDs who are currently studying at roughly the same stage as your GD. That ship sailed a few years ago, didn't it? I think they are being used as a smokescreen here. But it doesn't matter what detail you change, because as always it's the stuff you seem completely incapable of changing that gives you away.

I'm not sure about the granny annexe is real either, but it's too long winded to go into why that doesn't ring true with me. Unless your financial circumstances or living arrangements have changed dramatically in recent years or you've moved in with your parents?

However, your modus operandi and your single agenda obsession (namely state grammar school education compared to non-grammar and private education in terms of attainment and outcomes) comes through like a klaxon every time. Virtually every single thread you've ever started, and there have been many over the years, has been on the topic of education, yet you are not a teacher. Christ, you've even started threads to discuss the results of schools that aren't even in your half of England, let alone your own county. That's just not normal.

I'll lay it on the line here.

My gut feeling is that you no longer have any children of your own who are still in school and you deeply mourn the loss of that. You feel all at sea without it, because it was your comfort blanket. You enjoyed feeling connected to the word of school through your own DC and now they have left that has left a huge void in your life. You no longer have a legitimate reason to over-involve yourself into someone else's educational experience and leech off it for your own kicks.

The fact that this very vulnerable girl finds herself in this predicament and 'needs' you to be her saviour is probably manna from heaven for you. You get to indulge your obsession all over again.

This is about you, not her. And that's wrong.

You no longer have a legitimate reason to over-involve yourself in someone else's educational experience.

Also slightly weird that several years ago you wrote a thread about one of your own DDs where many of the details mirror some of those in this GDs situation to an uncanny degree.

On the back of that I am starting to wonder if the GD even exists, or whether you just need a reason to keep talking about all this stuff, because it's what you live for - going as far as making up fictional scenarios about schooling because you miss the real ones that have been and gone in your life.

The attitude towards my friends DD is coming solely, from the senior management. The subject teachers want to support her any way they can and would be supportive of a fresh start next September.

So the head has strongly indicated that GD will not be best served by continuing at that the grammar school, but her three subject teachers have gone against the head's assessment and told the girl and her parents otherwise, have they?

What tosh.

Is this whole thing a fictitious 'test-case' in order for you to work on your most recent crusade, which since your own diagnosis, is pushing for autistic students with an assortment of other challenges and vulnerabilities to be more strongly represented and supported n selective education? Are you compiling anecdotal evidence to support a petition to the education department or something? Because on reflection, that makes more sense to me than the likelihood that any of this is real.

I wonder if this scenario was actually the op 20 to 30 years ago. She was ĺet down by her education, grammar school, and hasn't been able to move on mentally. Therefore keeps returning to the scenario wishing that she could change what happened.

But no one can change the past. In order to content then need to move past it

I asked @redhilary days ago if anyone fought for her when she was struggling at school. She didn't answer.

It's not a stretch to imagine that yes, this is someone reliving and rewriting their own school experiences.

@DumplingsAndStew

I asked *@redhilary* days ago if anyone fought for her when she was struggling at school. She didn't answer.

It's not a stretch to imagine that yes, this is someone reliving and rewriting their own school experiences.

That would make a lot of sense. There’s quite a lot here that really doesn’t make much!!

?

There are quite a lot of tropes.

Misunderstood girl from rich creative Catholic family is led astray by bad pretty boy and falls pregnant.

Girl has very bright academic future but old grammar school turns against her.

Family has dark secrets about adoption in past, so girl must go through with pregnancy but has no-one to turn to except for old family retainer.

Old family retainer feels a sense of shame and somehow responsible-accepts the reprimand from the Young Miss at the Big House that she is to blame.

The bad boy is still on the scene. Papa offers him money to go away. This ruse fails. Fears are high that the girl will fall into the evil hands of the boy's family.

Old Retainer steps up and offers to take the girl in, while battling bravely for her future.

Old Retainer knows her own family must come second. Her own husband assures her that own family will "go down with the Titanic" in order to save this sacred young woman, who is wilfully misunderstood.

She will have the child and go on to build an empire. She loses contact with the Old Retainer who will one day, watch her on TV describing how she owes her Nobel Prize to someone whom she no longer sees.

Tis enough for the Old Retainer-who is to be found mumbling endless stats about Grammar Schools as she walks the cobbles of the mill town while gazing at the Big House.

She knows that she has kept the noble family together, even at the expense of her own, for that is the Natural Order of Things.

THE END

@redhilary

I have no idea who I'm supposed to have been in my previous Avatar ?

OP come on… Here’s just one of the threads from ‘another poster’ back in 2014:

DD2 has to do at least 2 hours homework Mon- Friday . She has strict 'curfew' times of 9.30 on a School Night she also has to prove to me she has done 2 hours before I let her out.

And here’s a bit of this thread, from you, in 2021:

I have a rule where I require DD1 to do 2hours of Homework a night over 6 days and DD2 to do 1h 30 over six days. I insist they show me

There are so many other examples as you are very recognisable, even down to punctuation.

I wouldn’t usually say that but posters like me have shared personal stuff on here to try and help / give you some alternative perspectives on this and people have done that in good faith.

In reality I think this is something that isn’t happening now, in 2021 but you’re still trying to process a traumatic time from past years.

Maybe it would be beneficial to start a thread on that and people can help?