To not want to drive 40 minutes to return a Jam Jar?

[itsme189]

A family member (partners side) made us all Jam for Christmas last year, lovely gift and was very nice.

They now want all the Jars back to do it again they are like Kilner Jars (just not branded I don't think) I do still have it in the random Tupperware cupboard.

I would have to drive 40 minutes to return the Jar DH thinks I should as it is thiers. I just said it was a gift and I am happy to not receive any Jam this year to avoid this. We wont see them between now and Christmas. He thinks I'm being unreasonable?

DH can't drive and there is no public transport to where they live!

98% are with you OP 😆

@MajorCarolDanvers

Royal Mail Amazon They collect

There are other ways round this.

None of which are as good as what the OP has already done!

"Oops... I dropped it... sorry"

Flippin' heck! I make jam and marmalade and chutney and pickles in jars and sloe gin in bottles and give loads away. Nobody ever returns the jars or bottles and I wouldn't expect it, even from next door. I use a mix of Kilner and saved jars - Bonne Maman ones are nice - but Kilner are better for being absolutely airtight.

But even the Kilner people say not to re-use the lids! Relative has lost the plot, and if she isn't willing to do the long drive for it, why on earth should you?

If your DH is so keen to comply, he should get his licence and do it himself. I would hate to have to be the driver all the time! Has he lost it or just never learnt?

:o brilliant

@TheKeatingFive

98% are with you OP 😆

And the 2% just didn’t read correctly, or accidentally pushed the wrong button 🤣

@itsme189

They messaged everyone individually asking for them back.

They've responded "I dont really want to drive all the way there, hopefully other people are more willing to return theirs or this will get expensive. And yeah I wont be making any for people who cant return it"

I DONT WANT YOUR BLODDY JAM

I just said no problem maybe let people know you need the Jar back next time.

Hahahaha that is a really weird response!! They have very high opinions of their jam.

If DH wants it returned, he can do it.

[quote itsme189]@MinnieGirl I can confirm the Jam was not worth the stress they are the type of people who I would never accept a favour from because you will pay for it 100 times over we only see them to keep DH's very old grandmother happy on Christmas[/quote]
I like to send people like this beautiful glittery Christmas cards with extra glitter in the envelopes.

Your dh’s aunt is indeed bonkers. The jam must cost her peanuts. I take it you will ignore her message. It is incredibly rude.

Kilner jar, £4, free delivery.

Ridiculous. I give home made jams as presents and would never dream of asking for the jar back.

In any case, it's DH problem, not yours!

Give them the empty jar wrapped up for Christmas.
Similar happened to me and the giver would not hand over the jam unless I undertook to reuse or return the (very ordinary) jar.

Well you’ve got the ideal Christmas present for them now, just wrap up the jar.

Just say no sorry I recycled it

I had missed your updates, when I posted the link to the jar on Amazon, @itsme189 - in light of their response, I wouldn't bother returning the jar or buying a new one!

Just order a box of them to be delivered as their Christmas gift. 2 problems sorted in one hit.

This relative is insanely rude. Imagine expecting you to drive the jar back while in the same breath saying she doesn't want to drive all the way to collect a mere jar. The irony! Does she realise it's the same distance each way?

I suspect due to her dour nature she doesn't get many visitors and this 'generous' gesture of hers was in her mind going to incur an increase in that. Really it's ridiculous.

Problem solved anyway, you don't need to enter into this jam jar debacle next year.

I dont really want to drive all the way there, hopefully other people are more willing to return theirs or this will get expensive. And yeah I wont be making any for people who cant return it

This is just fucking ridiculous. She is a jam martyr. Does she tell everyone how she’s making jam for Christmas?

Tell her no worries, I’ve just bought some from Tesco. 80p, job done.

Which reminds me, she’s coming to lunch, I need to dive into a cupboard and find last years bowl.

I can’t understand anyone buying jars to put jam in. I suppose if I was doing some fabulous pickled vegetable thing that looked pretty a la Oded Schwartz I might splash out on a fancy jar, but my pickles and marmalade go into recycled jars so have the additional flavour of save- the -planet- one -jar- at -a -time smug.

Stay 💯 out of it. No your family member, not your problem. If they contact you, tell them to contact your OH as he's sorting it. He can then decide what he wants to do, he can post it, or ask them to collect, or send them a new one. Either way, it's not your circus so there's no reason why you should get involved.

You don't need to send it back, drive over or buy a new one. This is bloody madness 😂

A friend makes slow gin,vodka etc and gifts for Christmas in decorated bottles.
A good 80% of people realize it's good to recycle,it's difficult to get nice bottles and return them during the year.Many with a grin and a wink about refilling it😀
I'd send them a new one if you don't have time to visit them .

Fucking nuts.
Fuck them.
They shouldn't have given you the gift in the first place if they wanted half of it back and expecting you to drive a total of 80 minutes is ridiculous.
And no, don't faff around buying a new one on Amazon or wrapping up that one and posting it.
I live in a country where there is absolutely loads of jam making going on (lots of fruit trees) and I've received jam loads of times as presents. I've never been asked to return a jar. Fuck's sake. How tight are those relatives...

And as for DH, if he's so bothered, he can work out how to return the jam jar. You are not a taxi service for fucking jam jars.

I make jams and chutneys as gifts for people very regularly. I love it when people return the jars because then I can reuse them, but I definitely do not expect it, and I certainly wouldn't dream of asking! The jar is part of the gift and I like to think that the recipient might get some use out of it once they've finished the jam/chutney.