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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be unhappy about this birthday gift from DH

174 replies

annaop · 18/10/2021 20:46

An electric toothbrush? Really?! Wrapped up nicely, as my 'main' present. I could barely conceal my disappointment. Married over two decades.

OP posts:
TumtumTree · 18/10/2021 21:08

YANBU - that was pretty rubbish, and I'm not someone who is precious about birthday presents at all.

Oh well - the pressure's off for your next present to him!

AICM · 18/10/2021 21:10

This is stupid.

It's not possible to comment on whether it's a good gift or a bad gift without knowing what she gives him.

If she bought him socks, then it's a good gift.

If she bought him a £600 watch it's a bad gift.

I note the OP has declined to give us the only piece of info that would actually be meaningful. Very telling.

She come back and decide to declare an amazing gift.

Figgyboa · 18/10/2021 21:13

I got one for mother's day. Best present, my previous one had just broken!

Sippinongingernjuice · 18/10/2021 21:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
annaop · 18/10/2021 21:16

What does it matter what gift I got him? It's not a bloody competition! If you care about someone, IMO, you get them a gift based on one of two main things: one, you get them something you know they would love, which may not necessarily be valuable in terms of cost but are valuable to the person receiving the gift (like the paintbrushes); two, you get them something which has personal meaning, like a trip away, or a personalised gift, or a locket.
Crazy that there are so many options, it reeks of late minute gift, like flowers from the fuel station.
PS I got him tickets to see a comedian he likes and arranged hotel stay for us both, plus a couple of shirts.

OP posts:
AICM · 18/10/2021 21:19

What does it matter what he got you then?

AICM · 18/10/2021 21:21

OP you sound like hard work.

Stovetopespresso · 18/10/2021 21:21

my husband's really meh at gifts. they're always from amazon. but yes a toothbrush wtf, about 20 years ago it would have been cool, in conjunction with something really thoughtful otr glamorous. not now.

Original poster
annaop · 18/10/2021 21:30

@AICM

What does it matter what he got you then?
Eh?
OP posts:
YoungGiftedPlump · 18/10/2021 21:44

@annaop

What does it matter what gift I got him? It's not a bloody competition! If you care about someone, IMO, you get them a gift based on one of two main things: one, you get them something you know they would love, which may not necessarily be valuable in terms of cost but are valuable to the person receiving the gift (like the paintbrushes); two, you get them something which has personal meaning, like a trip away, or a personalised gift, or a locket. Crazy that there are so many options, it reeks of late minute gift, like flowers from the fuel station. PS I got him tickets to see a comedian he likes and arranged hotel stay for us both, plus a couple of shirts.
So you got him a couple of shirts- for work?

Tickets and a stay for both of you isn't a gift.

GoodnightGrandma · 18/10/2021 21:45

I’m not getting anything, so be pleased you got something.

Original poster
annaop · 18/10/2021 21:48

Shirts for work? Don't be ridiculous.

Tickets and a stay for both of us is a gift as far as we are concerned. He's done likewise for me, once to something he absolutely detests, and other times it's been for what we both like. It's special to spend time away alone.

OP posts:
Original poster
annaop · 18/10/2021 21:49

@GoodnightGrandma

I’m not getting anything, so be pleased you got something.
Oh dear Grandma - when did that start?
OP posts:
LaikO · 18/10/2021 21:50

I'd love it, but I prefer practical gifts. 🙈 I'd be upset at the thought of £££s being spent on clothes or jewellery, but I suppose it depends on you and the sort of thing you'd like. If he knew an electric toothbrush wasn't needed or wanted, it's a bit of a letdown.

AnneLovesGilbert · 18/10/2021 21:50

@GoodnightGrandma

I’m not getting anything, so be pleased you got something.
Why not?
Holothane · 18/10/2021 21:52

I had my first one 25 years ago I picked it myself it was £40 at the time the first ones to come out, I loved it but I did pick it myself. Dh know never buy me house hold stuff unless I pick it. I’ve picked my own presents for a few years now. So yes I’d be hacked off. My ex did this with lasagna dishes one Christmas I was not happy.

Halfwreckedbykids · 18/10/2021 21:53

I got one from dh too...cheapest on in the pharmacy...in the pharmacy bag ...not wrapped.
It was something I wanted to replace but ffs this one could barely rotate..
Then I got a vaccum for cleaning windows next birthday..
Now that's a keeper...although I live the window vac but I had one already....
He sucks at presents

GoodnightGrandma · 18/10/2021 21:53

Several years ago. I never want anything because I buy what I want !
To be fair, I don’t get him much either for the same reason.

BudgeSquare · 18/10/2021 21:54

@AICM

OP you sound like hard work.
You really don't.

And i am about as far from precious or demanding or materialistic as could be imagined. I didn't have a wedding party or a baby shower or go to any of my graduations, etc. I don't expect loads of money spent on my birthday.

But it's a crap, mundane, boring present that says nothing about you as an individual

cushioncovers · 18/10/2021 21:57

If you didn't ask for an electric toothbrush and if you could easily afford to buy one if you wanted then it's a shit gift and you've every right to be pissed off op.

Lollypop701 · 18/10/2021 22:06

I got one, the year we bought something small for each other because we were a bit skint. He got aftershave and chocolate. Dh nearly had his eyeballs cleaned with that toothbrush! he has been much better since that threat. For me birthdays and Christmas are for wants not needs… and I’d bloody mentioned a nice bath oil a million times which was cheaper!

offyougotwantychops · 18/10/2021 22:07

It's not really about the toothbrush though is it? It's the lack of thought, the last minute 'oh shit, better get her something'.
It is a bit shit OP, I hope he at least got you a cake?
Happy birthday 🎂 🥳

Timetoretiretospain · 18/10/2021 22:10

@Brollywasntneededafterall

Buy him a willy warmer in a 'small 'size...
😂
MrsTerryPratchett · 18/10/2021 22:29

@AICM

OP you sound like hard work.
@AICM coming down on the husband's side? Shocked I tells you, shocked.
noblegreenk · 18/10/2021 22:44

Just count yourself lucky that you didn't get an actifry like I did a few years ago. I've told him that he's never to buy me something for the house again!