Are you responsible for having your husband's work clothes ready and get told off if he can't find stuff ??

[fussytodd]

I'm guessing a lot of people will say NO.

It's really grating on me.

@PackedintheUK and @Nothing Is Wrong, your posts made me laugh! I think we may have been separated at birth. It is a running joke in this house that I do not iron as once when I was putting up the ironing board, I caught my finger. Never again.
I'm with @Queenoftheashes, my dh is ironing his shirts now as I sit in bed !

@MissChanandlerBong81

So because you work from home and are therefore at home more you’re also a domestic servant?

Basically !

@NothingIsWrong, above meant for you !

My father used to yell over to my mother 'where's my socks?' and it used to drive me insane.

I swore I would never, ever wash a man's socks or be responsible for his laundry.

Erm, what? No! I’m not a housekeeper!

Tell your DH to clean, iron and get ready his own clothes!

In our house DH irons his own shirts, and we both do the laundry as and when it needs it. We both wash DS’s stuff in with our own and dry it and hang it up. If DS’s stuff needed ironing DH would do it when he does his shirts.

He only crashes as you pick up the slack. I get you do laundry BUT it doesn't absolve him of responsibility for is own stuff. I wash and dry and create a pile on the bed for DH and DD to put away for themselves. They might ask me if something is washed or if it was in the wash but not responsible for it being in the drawer or set out for his/her ease in the am - it can be a bit insiduous making you responsible so I took the view I would get stuff sorted but they are responsible for getting things IN the wash and PUTTING IT AWAY both of them if the washing is getting backed up will put a wash on and know to plan things so we are not inundated with drying washing (even check the weather so it can dry outside etc)

So he is somewhat unreasonable in giving you shit for it and thinking his responsibilities end with going to work and not doing anything in the house or not taking any responsibility for himself etc.

My favourite saying when someone asks me something I think is bordering on unreasonable I say "it will be where you last left it most likely"

Yep, in that I do all the clothes washing in the house, or 99% - he assumes he'll have clean clothes in the wardrobe and he would probably be unamused if he went to get ready for work and there wasn't any and I'd not mentioned I'd not done any washing for a few days (although he wouldn't wake me up at 5am being a prick, no).

BUT before everyone loses their minds - I haven't done a food shop since we moved in together. Cook about twice a year. Have packed lunches made for me when I was still going to the office. Would also be mildly annoyed if he just didn't do it and didn't at least give me a heads up.

I find cooking and shopping for food boring, he finds laundry boring. It balances - doesn't sound like your situation balances, so he's being a prick.

In this house, the correct answer to “Where is my…?” is “Up your bum.”* Even if I KNOW where DP’s stuff is I keep quiet on the principle that he should use his looking eyes rather than treat me as first port of call. So the idea I’d get his work outfit ready…? How am I supposed to know what he wants to wear that day?

*(With the caveat that the true answer is sometimes “DD hid it and can’t remember where”.)

Hahahahahaha

NO

oh yeah and I don't iron - my joke on that is I have an everhot oven and I will put stuff on that if it needs a bit of heat through it to flatten it out and air e.g. duvet covers and sheets or towels - I will say when putting stuff on there - just doing the ironing ha ha ha

I don't even get my 7 year old's uniform "ready", so like fuck would I get my husband's.

I do most of the washing, i don't mind doing it, will chuck it in with my bit's. However my rule is, if it's not in the washing basket it's not my problem. I'll dry it and fold it with my stuff but he's responsible for it there after. He puts it away, does his own ironing. He would also happily do his own washing.

So maybe I'm a minority in that, but he would never moan at me if i hadn't done it, he would just do it himself

I posted a while ago as to whether I’d be unreasonable to ask my dp to do his own laundry, after him asking if he had any clean x,y,z on many an occasion and it driving me up the wall. We have four kids.

Put it this way; I now do 5 people’s washing and he does his own.

Errr... no. And I don't iron his shirts either. He does that himself (plus the odd thing I need, most of my clothes don't need to be ironed)

Of course not. He is an adult without special needs

How have you not lost your shit when he woke you at 5am?

DH woke me a couple of times before I tore strips off him.

Seriously, you need to stop it all. Never do it, not an emergency, not for a special occasion - ever.

I'm hoping you don't have to dress him too! He needs to pick up a bit is he only just learning to be an adult?

No. I will sometimes helpfully fish out some clean clothes for him when he 'can't find' something (usually because I've plonked something else on top of it!) but this is entirely voluntary and would not be expected.

No! Am I blinking heckers like!! He is responsible for his own stuff. It would be laughable if I expected DH to do this and I shouted at him if he hadn’t got my things together in the morning. Wouldn’t dream of expecting this and I would tell him where to go if he ever took this stance with me.

Absolutely no fucking way. I would quite frankly find it completely off putting and revolting if you man couldn't sort his own clothes out.

I don't understand why people get into these situations.

Even my teenage son can sort out his own clothes.

"All the wives in my family do this."

Are you from a religious or very old fashioned community?

Even when I wasn't working, I would never sort my husband's clothes out for him and not would be expect it. This sounds like something from 50 years ago.

Hahaha no. I’m not his mother and l can’t be bothered. He doesn’t sort my clothes or work clothes out. We both work full time, l often work more hours than him. Even if l didn’t, that’s so not my job

If I were ‘told off’, dh would be told to fuck off. I’m a Sahm but not well so limited energy. Dh does a lot around the house and I do the washing and ironing plus most of the time put the clothes away. He asks me very nicely if shirts are running low and I iron even if I can only manage to iron one shirt at a time.

This btw is the only thing dh doesn’t do. He comes home and will tidy up and clear the kitchen without comment and it can be a bombsight, hangs my coat, puts my shoes away, take dd to her activities etc after driving for an hour each way to and from work etc.

I mean I don't know if he ' tells me off '. He just gets really grumpy and has a go at me at 5 am and wakes me from my sleep and makes me feel like shit, if he can't find a clean shirt or socks.

The first time he did this would be the last time!!!

My ex used to do this. So I stopped doing his laundry entirely.
He used to moan “I’ve got no clean trousers!” all the fucking time. I would just shrug and say “That sounds like a ‘you’ problem”.

Women being expected to be the maid really grates my fucking nerves.