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Original poster

To think that daughter wont be able to go clubbing due to tightening of age checks

240 replies

Carolinethe · 15/10/2021 14:08

My DD is one of the youngest in her year -August baby- and so has only just turned 17.

She has several friends who are turning 18 shortly and one has already mentioned going to nightclubs etc. She gors to the pub with friends and I gather has been served alcohol before now but I dont like to probe too much.

My perception is that licensing requirements have been tightened up so its much harder to get in if you are under 18 these days. I dont want to tell her to try and blag it and have the embarassment of being turned away by a bouncer for not being old enough when all her friends will have got in. So realisticall is she fated to not going clubbing until until next year when probably the attraction will have worn off/ everyone will be going away?

In my day we were attending clubs from about 15 onwards and I had various forms of ID stating fale birthdates to make us 18+ for when we were asked. I believe now this has been clamped down on so that id is only available with proof of birthday etc so no chance of faking it.

what do others do? Or is it out of reach for her?

OP posts:
Skysblue · 15/10/2021 18:56

That’s tricky OP. I’m out of date so don’t know how easily or not she’ll get in. I’d suggest that if she really wants to try it, make sure she’s with friends who will definitely not go in unless she also gets in (which is a big ask). I’d suggest some small house parties at yours perhaps, so she has somewhere she can drink and dance with her friends and isn’t too uncool/left out? Also do check if there are is under 18s dance stuff near you. Unlikey I know. Maybe roller disco ice skating I dunno…

I went clubbing almost every weekend when I was seventeen. I had a brilliant time! But looking back it isn’t something I’d want for my daughter, lots of unsafe situations, lots of being mauled by strangers and letting them because I didn’t know how to get out of situations and was crazy drunk, lots of being offered drugs (didn’t accept) / bought drinks (did accept) by strangers, lots of getting bored and deciding to go home alone and wandering around London backstreets drunk looking for a bus at 2am. Don’t mourn it too much if she doesn’t get in.

Minfilia · 15/10/2021 18:58

I went clubbing from 15, so year 2001 - went 2-3 times a week, probably got asked for ID three times in the three years I was underage.

I was asked for ID regularly from age 25, so 10 years ago. It’s definitely tightened up. I still occasionally get asked now at 36, but I look a lot younger than that (apparently I look about 25).

DD16 is late august born and her closest friends are all September/October so we will have the same problem here! She’s happy to stick with gigs for now though (although the last one she went to didn’t ask for ID for drinks, apparently!)

Sweettea1 · 15/10/2021 19:05

So you think her friends will be bored of clubbing by the time August next year comes when they haven't even started going clubbing yet.
Why any1 wants never mind encourages their 17 year old to go clubbing is beyond me there is a legal age for a reason.
I'd checks have become really strict now (thank god) especially were I am and photograph is also taken at the door.

TabithaTiger · 15/10/2021 19:28

DS was a summer baby. He used a photo driving licence of a boy who looked vaguely similar, never seemed to have any problem getting in.

TrainspottingWelsh · 15/10/2021 20:10

Not rtfd, but dsd is August born, now 20. She never really had any problems. Dd, 17 but nearly 18 has been clubbing since they opened post covid. I haven't enquired too closely about where their fake id came from. Both have always known they can ring at anytime if they have a problem, eg not getting in a club, but dsd was always ok and dd is so far.

It is much harder now than it was for us and I'm not sure they'd have found it as easy in a big city.

skybluee · 15/10/2021 20:26

I'm glad it's tightened up. I went clubbing too young (from the age of 15). We used to get the train to Birmingham, Wolverhampton etc then stay out all night and get the very early morning train back. It was just too young. Wish I'd have waited til the 6th form. I knew someone who went to bars and pubs when she was in year 7. She hung out with one of my friends. To be fair she looked incredibly old for her age but she was way way too young to be around all of that.

MrsSkylerWhite · 15/10/2021 20:28

Liverbird77

I am actually glad things have been tightened up. In my day, back in the '90s, I could get I to pubs and clubs from the age of 14. It's horrifying to think back on it. We drank irresponsibily and were exposed to situations we didn't know ow how to handle“

Exactly this. Why do you want your underage daughter going to clubs?

PoetryLaser · 15/10/2021 20:31

@loopylindi

I understand that you don't want your daughter to be 'left out' of a friendship group 'cos she's too young, but I am also concerned that you think it's ok to break the rules when it suits you. Where do you draw the line? She's too young to drive so how would you feel if one of her (car owning) friends encouraged her to have a go at driving and someone got killed? Or if someone encouraged her to have sex (cos she is old enough for that but if) she was encouraged ......
That's quite a hysterical comparison @loopylindi
PieMistee · 15/10/2021 20:35

She has time, I still go clubbing at nearly 50 😁

Keke94LND · 15/10/2021 20:37

I'm not sure it's a good idea for your daughter to have a fake ID and be illegally going to clubs tbh ... my birthday is at the very end of August so I experienced what yours will experience but I just sucked it up, there will still be loads of people in her year who aren't 18 yet and everyone will just go to house parties anyway, also the novelty won't have worn off in 10 months time

Middersweekly · 15/10/2021 20:38

Yes unfortunately things are quite strict these days. We didn’t have photographic ID back in the day besides a passport which no-one took with them. My 18yr old got ID’ed for an energy drink in Tesco Grin She had the same problem as your DD with an August birthday but she’s not the clubbing type so wasn’t really bothered at the time. She’s at Uni now and she’s been clubbing and to bars several times. I’d probably let your DD know she could get turned away. Embarrassing maybe but if she doesn’t try she won’t know.

Fifilafrog · 15/10/2021 22:25

As the "older" mum of a nine year old girl I am so happy to hear that they have tightened the rules as the thought of her going clubbing underaged (as I did in the early nineties - totally get this makes me a hypocrite) absolutely terrifies me!

However, this lends the question, what do young people do instead these days?? The thought of them hanging around parks/street corners is equally, if not more terrifying 😱. Do I even want to know the answer to this question? I am properly dreading the teenage years, I will no doubt be a permanently exhausted nervous wreck!

Bodule · 15/10/2021 22:40

I'm far from encouraging (hate clubs and everything to do with them), but August-born DD has been clubbing since she was 15, using someone else's provisional licence, sold to her on the black market for £50. She's now 17. She tells me stories from her nights out that I find completely horrendous.

HotSauceCommittee · 15/10/2021 22:43

You are not probing too much. She is your daughter and you are her parent.

katieg03 · 15/10/2021 22:47

I never get asked for ID when I'm out but do when I buy medicine. I'm 36.its embarrassing. I'm in Scotland and we are supposed to have this covid passport thing but I just noticed it's got my date of birth on. So I guess if you are in Scotland that would hinder her even more! When you look back at photos of us parents at their age I think we looked young and kids and teens nowadays look so much older. I mean they haven't plucked the life out of their brows for a start lol

tttigress · 15/10/2021 22:49

The last time I attempted bto go to a nightclub, I was told they needed to scan my I'd to make a copy of it, I had no idea with me (was about 35 at the time), so didn't get in.

To be honest I don't miss clubbing, but feel sorry for all the kids that are having their freedoms reduced.

summercupcake · 15/10/2021 22:49

Around here...some clubs and pubs are stricter than others. As long as they look old enough some places will let them in and some won't.

It's a worrying time for parents.

For those saying..oh well we were drinking in clubs from 15, life if VERY different now.

summercupcake · 15/10/2021 22:52

And there are always older blokes happy to buy underage girls drinks.

So scary. Please educate your daughters.

Siameasy · 15/10/2021 22:53

Shame really, it is very strict now and until I hit 40 I was still getting asked.
I was able to get into clubs in London at 15 (early 90s) easily. Fake IDs were easy to make (it was mainly pubs asking for ID). Off licences, well my friend had massive boobs and looked older so she usually went in.
Life seems a lot more serious now. I have always loved a disco - still go clubbing now and my DD (6) loves a discotheque too (well a wedding reception!)

Sweettea1 · 15/10/2021 23:05

@tttigress

The last time I attempted bto go to a nightclub, I was told they needed to scan my I'd to make a copy of it, I had no idea with me (was about 35 at the time), so didn't get in.

To be honest I don't miss clubbing, but feel sorry for all the kids that are having their freedoms reduced.

Kids shouldn't be in clubs so no freedom reduce. Produce your I'd and get in simple.

Times have changed and yes I sneaked off clubbing at 16/17 but bk then there weren't knife/gun crimes everyweek can't even look at some1 these days without a argument/fight.

Siameasy · 15/10/2021 23:07

There were loads of fights in my day to be fair I’m not sure what has changed that people think life is so dangerous now. I can remember waiting HOURS for a night bus that never came in T Square. God it was seedy - if I were 15 in London now I’d be much safer as public transport is far better.

Porcupineintherough · 15/10/2021 23:11

@Siameasy how old are you (out of interest)? There was no drink spiking in my day, I find that a very scary development.

silkience · 15/10/2021 23:17

Times have changed and yes I sneaked off clubbing at 16/17 but bk then there weren't knife/gun crimes everyweek can't even look at some1 these days without a argument/fight

@Sweettea1 sorry but this is nonsense, times haven't changed, YOU have changed. Risk was always there, in different forms but still there, especially for young women! You were no safer then, just blissfully unaware. Now you (and many other posters) want young people to do without the choices and experiences you had.

Siameasy · 15/10/2021 23:19

Mid 40s and I believe I have actually been spiked once but I don’t think it happens a lot. Yes it’s a concern but not a reason to avoid going out and having fun. I don’t find it that scary-at some point I became aware that it wasn’t a good idea to leave your drink unattended. Maybe there was a campaign I can’t remember. People did spike with booze in the past before rohypnol became known.

Sweettea1 · 15/10/2021 23:26

@silkience Why do I want younger people to miss out thats ridiculous does not effect me in the slightest as to what they get up to. Yes risk has always been there but you can not say the risk has not doubled with crime rates today.
I don't remember any1 getting stabbed for knocking over a drink back in my day.