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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be frustrated by people who are just oblivious

306 replies

Manyview · 15/10/2021 07:07

Nursery drop off queue - always a joy

Particular group of parents who just don't seem to have any grip on reality

Husband and I work hard in public sector jobs. They asked me how work is (for me social care) and I was like well pretty manky, big staff and money shortages, everyone's working v hard etc

Response : oh yeah I think I heard something about that last week...and covid is still about a bit isn't it apparently?? Did you hear that?

Is it just me? How can you be soooooo oblivious to real (and stressful) life around you? How can people be just so lacking in understanding of the genuine issues affecting real people?

OP posts:
OnlyFoolsnMothers · 15/10/2021 11:08

@silveryslade

And yes, I do end up being informed of the important stuff (as it is hard to avoid news completely) but it means I spend the majority of my time thinking about other things, less time being worried or upset.
Knowing what generally is going on in the country you live in doesn’t have to be all consuming - it is quite possible to know about the petrol crisis, the gas prices and about covid whilst still decide what’s for dinner
OnlyFoolsnMothers · 15/10/2021 11:09

I also now know why Loose Women is so successful in this country- god help us

WorraLiberty · 15/10/2021 11:09

Husband and I work hard in public sector jobs. They asked me how work is (for me social care) and I was like well pretty manky, big staff and money shortages, everyone's working v hard etc

That ^^ probably threw them as they may have been making polite conversation. A bit like when you say "Hi, how are you?" and someone gives you a list of their ailments.

Not sure about the "and covid is still about a bit isn't it apparently?? Did you hear that?"

Did they really say that or are you just annoyed they weren't overly sympathetic to your work struggles?

ClinkeyMonkey · 15/10/2021 11:11

Christ, I fall for it every time. Another bun fight started by OP who duly buggers off never to return. Or maybe she's too busy dealing with her 'manky' workplace trials and tribulations. Or maybe she doesn't like the replies.

Pythonista · 15/10/2021 11:11

@OnlyFoolsnMothers

I also now know why Loose Women is so successful in this country- god help us
Wow. Just wow.

Fwiw I think Loose Women is probably the biggest pile of shit out there (although I have never seen it). But that is a truly nasty comment. Do you look down on people in real life as well?

Pythonista · 15/10/2021 11:11

@WorraLiberty

Husband and I work hard in public sector jobs. They asked me how work is (for me social care) and I was like well pretty manky, big staff and money shortages, everyone's working v hard etc

That ^^ probably threw them as they may have been making polite conversation. A bit like when you say "Hi, how are you?" and someone gives you a list of their ailments.

Not sure about the "and covid is still about a bit isn't it apparently?? Did you hear that?"

Did they really say that or are you just annoyed they weren't overly sympathetic to your work struggles?

Exactly. Nobody would say that.
Threebillygoatsgruff · 15/10/2021 11:12

People ask how work is to make small talk - they aren't expecting a litany of complaints. And having received them, they don't know what to say

This ^ . At nursery drop off they are expecting a stock reply such as "its good, thank you, busy busy " , not to hear about staff shortages or how the workplace coffee machine broke or how the toilets are blocked. You sound a bit patronising OP, sounds like you don't think much of them because they can't discuss your all-so- important public sector job. Maybe it's not that they can't, maybe they just don't want to.

Georgist · 15/10/2021 11:13

[quote HeartsAndClubs]**@Silvercatowner erm I think you are the one who is oblivious there.

Lots and lots of coughs and colds doing the rounds ATM, I have one. There have and wil always be coughs, you do know that coughing isn’t a new phenomenon since COVID?[/quote]
I don't think people assume that coughs are definitely due to covid. But there is quite a high probability someone with a cough has covid.

Pythonista · 15/10/2021 11:18

If someone is concerned about someone coughing then keep your distance. But to basically pin the covid numbers on people with coughs going about their daily business shows a huge amount of misinformation and ignorance (ironically!).

So should the people with lung conditions/chronic coughs etc just lock themselves away?

MargaretThursday · 15/10/2021 11:18

[quote arethereanyleftatall]@FreedomFaith
Because @thisplaceisweird stat graph is pointless. We're testing more. Our numbers of deaths pp is lower than many countries. [/quote]
You're right in that the graph doesn't tell all, but it isn't as simply about testing as you're putting.
Italy is doing about a 1/3 of cases, but their cases are around 1/9th of ours, for example.

If a country is doing fewer tests it may be that they're testing only people with symptoms, like we did in the first wave, so then would get a higher test positivity. England's test positivity was over 40%, and in my area over 90%, in the first wave. So in some ways test positivity gives a better picture.

England positivity rate is 7.7%
France: 1.03%
Italy: 0.94%
Spain: 2.2%
Germany: 6.4%

The WHO has suggested a positive rate lower than 3% as a general benchmark.

DILevil · 15/10/2021 11:20

@Silvercatowner

I was at the chemist stood behind someone who said to the assistant 'I've got a really bad cough (cough cough) please can you recommend something?'

After 20 months...

Completely agree with you, the amount of people phoning their GPs with a cough who haven’t done a PCR test as “I know it’s not covid” is bonkers. Wanting covid over doesn’t make it so. England no masks, Wales still masks? Why the difference.
silveryslade · 15/10/2021 11:23

Knowing what generally is going on in the country you live in doesn’t have to be all consuming - it is quite possible to know about the petrol crisis, the gas prices and about covid whilst still decide what’s
@OnlyFoolsnMothers , which funnily enough I do know about without making any effort to watch the news, even avoiding it to some extent. Thankfully, the immediate effect on us is minimal as we have an electric car and an affordable fixed rate utility billing. So whilst I sympathise I'm not going to spend an endless amount of time worrying about it.

Pythonista · 15/10/2021 11:24

Completely agree with you, the amount of people phoning their GPs with a cough who haven’t done a PCR test as “I know it’s not covid” is bonkers.
Wanting covid over doesn’t make it so. England no masks, Wales still masks? Why the difference.

I know mine isn't covid because it has been there for years. I do my best not to cough in public but it isn't always possible.

Perhaps some posters on here should look up chronic conditions before showing their ignorance.

And I live in England and have seen 99% of people still wearing masks.

silveryslade · 15/10/2021 11:25

And Loose Women is far too depressing for me to want to watch regularly. Too much moaning and panicking about the news.Wink

ISaidDontLickTheBin · 15/10/2021 11:26

YABU OP, As PP have already said, you started it by breaking the rules of small talk.

Pythonista · 15/10/2021 11:26

Isn't it ironic that the ones slating people for not knowing anything are in fact the ones showing that they don't know anything?

Redredwiney · 15/10/2021 11:30

But there is quite a high probability someone with a cough has covid

FFS. Use your brain people!

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 15/10/2021 11:33

Do you look down on people in real life as well? if you mean do I have opinions- yes- most people have them. Just like most people like to know what’s happening in the world around them. Deliberately ignorant people I have little time for

silveryslade · 15/10/2021 11:34

@OnlyFoolsnMothers

Do you look down on people in real life as well? if you mean do I have opinions- yes- most people have them. Just like most people like to know what’s happening in the world around them. Deliberately ignorant people I have little time for
How ironic.Grin
OnlyFoolsnMothers · 15/10/2021 11:37

silveryslade one could say the same of you- what exactly do you find so offensive about my point of view?
I’m proud to say I surround myself with knowledgeable people, we may not share the same views but we can articulate ourselves and hold discussions.

andyoldlabour · 15/10/2021 11:38

We currently have twice the number of weekly deaths and three times the number of weekly cases of Covid than at the same time last year in the UK, yet hardly anyone down here in the South East is wearing masks or socially distancing.
People think it is all over, when the truth is very different.

Pythonista · 15/10/2021 11:38

@OnlyFoolsnMothers

Do you look down on people in real life as well? if you mean do I have opinions- yes- most people have them. Just like most people like to know what’s happening in the world around them. Deliberately ignorant people I have little time for
GrinGrinGrin This has to be a wind up - surely nobody is that lacking in self awareness?
Pythonista · 15/10/2021 11:39

@OnlyFoolsnMothers

silveryslade one could say the same of you- what exactly do you find so offensive about my point of view? I’m proud to say I surround myself with knowledgeable people, we may not share the same views but we can articulate ourselves and hold discussions.
As do many of us. Doesn't mean we want to hear a stranger whining in detail about their job.
silveryslade · 15/10/2021 11:39

NB there's a difference between being ignorant and realising the words problems are complex and you certainly don't know everything there is to know about them (neither does anyone else) or indeed everything there is to know about how intelligent other people are.

There is another way to support people. Instead of assuming your knowledge is far superior how about not prejudging them and trying to help and support them wherever you reasonably can.?

Redredwiney · 15/10/2021 11:39

@OnlyFoolsnMothers

Do you look down on people in real life as well? if you mean do I have opinions- yes- most people have them. Just like most people like to know what’s happening in the world around them. Deliberately ignorant people I have little time for
I think you should take a long hard look in the mirror before you post comments like that. The irony!