My sister has said I've made things awkward but I disagree

[Robinson89]

I worked in child care for over 10 years, mainly as a nanny, and although I've changed professions completely now, I still occasionally babysit for some families during evenings and weekends. My rate is £10ph and has been for the last few years.

Last week my sisters friend (I don't know her personally) asked if I'd be interested in babysitting her children occasionally. I said yes and told her to pass my number on and let her know to ring me if she had any questions. Yesterday I received a text from the friend asking if I could babysit this upcoming weekend as she wanted to go on a night out for her friends birthday. It would be for around 6 hours until 11:30pm. I told her no problem, asked for her address and explained that my rate was £10. She replied shortly after explaining that she was looking to pay around £8.50 as that is all she could afford. I sent a polite text back to say I understood her position, but unfortunately my rate was £10 and it is what I charge all my families. I said if she changed her mind then to let me know and I'd happily babysit for her.

I never heard anything about it again until my sister phoned me this morning to say that her friend was really disappointed that she couldn't go on her night out and why would I expect £10 for basically putting the kids to bed and sitting on the sofa watching tv all night . I have no idea why my sister is even entertaining this, and frankly I'm a bit hurt. It has nothing to do with the fact that I'd be sat watching the tv whilst the kids are in bed. It's the fact that I'm giving up my weekend (I work full time myself) to babysit her children and not being able to spend time in my own home with my own family. I'm not desperate for the money so my down time is really important to me. I'm also a qualified trained professional who knows what to do in the event of an emergency. AIBU?

@residentkaleidoscope

£60 for a night of babysitting, I'm must be in the wrong profession lol. You did nothing wrong OP, ignore your sister.

I feel like this and paid that for a night out just before Covid. It spoilt my night knowing I’d spent £60 before actually spending any money.

You have made things awkward - for your sister - as she clearly promised what she couldn't deliver. You were right to stick to your boundaries. I think it's bullshit that she didn't go on her night out for the sake of £9. Total bullshit. And yes, your sister could have babysit but she didn't did she.

Your sister and her friend are being ridiculous. 10 quid an hour really isn't that much for a qualified trained professional. If she wanted to pay less, she should have asked the 15 y.o. neighbour or smth. Idk. Why do people expect to pay a pittance when someone is actually qualified to do said job and is clearly quite capable of doing that particular job. It genuinely baffles me.

Cheeky cow. She was the one who made it awkward. Good for you for holding firm but remaining polite.
Yadnbu.
Do you think your sister suggested you would be flexible?

@Viviennemary

I think its quite a hefty charge for evening babysitting. But if that's your price that's it. Presumably its cash in hand or will you be declaring it as earned income.

stop being a DICK

I need to add YANBU at all, I just don’t know how people afford a babysitter!

@user1493494961

£60 wow, (sorry, there's two).

How much are you willing to look after my children for from 5.30 so several hours of looking after them, getting them ready and settled down in bed until 11.30 Ush?

For those aghast at £60, remember it’s for six hours of work. That’s a very long night out, because it’s a special occasion. She should expect it to cost a lot or try to reduce the time abit. My nights out are usually three hours max. since I’ve had kids.😂

You're not being unreasonable. That actually seems like a low rate anyway. I used to get €10 an hour 9 years ago as a 19 year old with no qualifications.

My 14 year old charges £10 an hour - if there are 2 children £8 for 1 child per hour - so no. If your sister wants to do it for free she can

@Learningtobeafeministagain

My 14 year old charges £10 an hour - if there are 2 children £8 for 1 child per hour - so no. If your sister wants to do it for free she can

good on her... nice little earner.. 🌸

YANBU. How rude of the friend and your sister. Tell your sister she should respect your time more. And if you wanted to offer mate’s rates it’s to your own mates. As others have said if your sister is so bothered she should offer to babysit herself. Well done for sticking to your boundaries. Some people are hugely selfish.

YANBU! She could well skip 1 or 2 drinks to make up the £9. She sounds like a cf.

"my cat charges more than that"
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I can just imagine CF negotiating the price of drinks with the barman

"Well actually I was hoping to pay this instead..."

Perfectly reasonable price.
That's your rate and that's the end of it. If she doesn't like it she's free to choose another babysitter, or cancel her night out, or book you for the number of hours she can afford.

So let your sister babysit instead. IMO she’s got a nerve to try to make you feel bad.

Presumably its cash in hand or will you be declaring it as earned income.

That's such a dickish comment!

@EineReiseDurchDieZeit

That is, if I'm understanding you correctly OP that you asked for £10 total not per hour?

Of course you’re misunderstanding her. The OP a said my rate is £10 ph

How lovely of them to blackmail you!
Where I live 10ph is cheap.

The OP is very clear in her post her charge is £10 per hour (she write £10ph).

I don't think you are being unreasonable at all! That's your rate she either uses you and pays or uses someone else if she needs cheaper. If that is your rate anyone can take it or leave it!

So, on her night out, was she going to complain at the bar for the price of drinks when she could buy a bottle as Tesco much cheaper?

As the years go by and as I read more, I realise just how shafted I was by the couple I babysat for quite regularly who paid me a pound less than the hours I was there - so 6 hours babysitting got me a whole £5

It’s having responsibilities of children in your care, not watching tv that you are being paid for. YANBU! Tell your sister to babysit if she’s so aghast!

I've done it, and watching tv in someone else's house is no fun. They tell you to drink whatever's in their refrigerator but all they have is kombucha. Half the time you can't figure out how to get the tv to play sound in their expensive sound system, so you have to watch it on mute; or the child wakes up anxious halfway through because they aren't used to having a babysitter. At the end of it, you've lost your whole Saturday night which is the night most of us relax on a weekend.