to ask you what made you stop being friends with someone?

[BobbiPinsOn]

she had a hidden camera recording in a bedroom she offered me to sleep in at her house on a visit, I made comments about her on a phone call while in the bedroom. she wrote a WhatsApp status about it and I blocked her. That's how it ended for us

You?

Told my xh about a casual relationship I was having after we'd split up. Denied it but I'd seen the Facebook messages so I just disengaged and never spoke again, I had supported her through her marriage breakdown as well.

An old friend, really close, although in hindsight I can see she probably used me as I was the only single in our group and always up for a night out. She cheated on her dh many times and I think once I met my now xh, who was a distant acquaintance of her h, she just distanced herself. I think I probably knew too much! Very hurtful at the time but I'm much more ruthless these days. I never fall out with friends but if there's a genuine issue I just walk away, I have a lot of excellent friends and don't have room for rubbish ones!

Because she was all about herself and was a huge drain on my mental health. She was always hard done by, her life was so tough, people were so mean etc. She lived in a lovely place, with a close, loving family (not rich but certainly not poor). She was just constantly moaning about not being well off (she was in a part-time admin job for a small company and her husband didn’t work, so, there should be no expectation of being well off in those circumstances). I supported her through divorce and when she got remarried, she and her new husband went super religious (she went from never ever mentioning God to being full on ‘halleluja’ (sp)). I realised that I didn’t look forward to meeting up, that I’d have to somewhat psych myself up for a couple of hours to deal with her complete lack of realism and draining behaviour and that’s when I realised the ‘friendship’ was over.

I've started to withdraw from a so called friend of 13 years.

Recently had my first night out following my relationship breakup, made an effort, was feeling ok about myself, on arrival was greeted with the words, in front of the whole group "what are you wearing, what do you look like?" With a sneer on her face. I felt like shit all evening. You could see the group looked uncomfortable too.

Its taken me so long to see that she uses me as a way to make herself feel better.

During a discussion with a group of colleagues about home improvements I mentioned I'd saved and had a new fence installed, her response was well it's not like you have to pay for much yourself in a council house, whereas I own my house, I wish I only had to pay for a fence (tinkly laugh) she really didn't need to point it out.

What I thought of as banter, is really just having a dig wherever she can.
We work together so I'm not able to do a dramatic flounce I'm just gradually having less and less to do with her.

I wouldn't accept half of what she says to me from others and honestly have no idea who I accept it from her.

Hurtful behavior, the last straw was I was looking for a job. She was offered a job that she considered beneath her but thought I might want it and recommend me to it and I got it. Several months later she got made redundant and then told me my job should have been hers and was very resentful of me.

Mine: was a total disaster all the time, hopeless with jobs, got fired all the time and I’m not even sure I knew why- it was always a personality clash

Hopeless with money, on one such disaster with a job she had given up her previous place and lost her accommodation when they sacked her. She shared my room/bed even for an while and instead of contributing she went off and splashed a huge amount of cash on a really bad hair do.

Got back on her feet, went from drama to drama, stole a winning £10 lottery ticket, pissed my landlord off so we got served notice then eventually when I was really in need of a bit of space harassed and harassed me with calls every 15 mins

The true nature of just how fucking weird she was only got told to me when I’d done myself the favour and left her to it.

My "friend" kicked me out of her house. I was drunk. I slept in my car and asked a relative to come and get me because her boyfriend was in a mood. She then went to Australia for a month and then pretended we were friends when she came back. I had to tell her why I would no longer be her friend. She didn't even know I'd got home ok. For a month.

DONE!

Got herself in a pickle at her work by making up lies, implicating me. Another staff member told me so I popped around to find out what the issue was and clear the air. She refused to join in any discussion at all to sort it out. Other staff member listed a number of things my 'friend' had said about me including I was promoted to manager because I slept with the area manager! Wow, jealously overdrive and nasty.

Decided to walk away from the drama.

I've been a nightmare friend in my time and I'm beyond lucky that I still have such good friends although I think I have been a good friend for many years now I was car crash throughout my twenties, for bits of my thirties and again for a tiny bit of my early forties. But, hey! I finally grew up!

I've let some friendships gently disappear because it was clear they weren't working for either of us so it's hard to say I ended them because really it would be both people doing that. I did end one a few years ago. Ex-friend did not like another friend's husband and that was fine. I'd had difficulties with him but we eventually became very close and he was my brother from another mother. I got why he riled her though, so her disliking him didn't end our friendship. What did was when she posted on a Facebook group that was set up around a pub she and our mutual friend used to go to in their teens (before I knew either of them). Someone asked what mutual friend was up to these days and ex-friend said "Oh, she's just married to some cunt." I don't know why it didn't enter her mind that our mutual friend would see it, which was hurtful enough, but her dislike of the husband aside it was so bloody disrespectful to our mutual friend to define her as nothing else than a wife to someone she didn't like.

There had been issues on and off over the years, this ex-friend was pretty selfish, slow to be there when you might need her. She didn't come to visit me when I was seriously ill in the hospital because she had a cold. For over a month, apparently. I was happy to let things go because there were other aspects of her that were a lot of fun, so I didn't rely on her for things that she wasn't ever going to be able to give if that makes sense? She doesn't like doing phone calls much so I sent her a long message on Facebook messenger explaining why I couldn't continue being her friend. I was incredibly polite and not cruel and to her credit, she apologised and understood and blah. But yeah. I guess you can push me about quite a lot but turn on someone I really love and care for and then you are out of my life for good.

@Kittii

The day I was diagnosed with cancer she told me to find other friends to support me because she was busy...

Oh my god, that is so cold!

One when I was a lot younger..she made a big thing of me getting the night off from work and going to another city for her birthday..she chose to work on my birthday outing. I was so hurt at the inequality there

More recently, a good friend who turned into a covid conspiracy theorist..made me feel guilty for having tests, and was rude about me on a social media post for complying with the rules

Been friends since aged 4. She told my daughter that she was an accident and that we had never wanted her.

She wasn’t, and we did /do.

Violent outbursts. I was planning kids and realised I didn’t feel safe them being in my life if there were vulnerable children around.

I knew her from school had always supported her during her endless dramas even though I hated that she bitched behind everyone's backs. When I was in great need of a friend, she wasn't ab le to support me. I always knew the relationship was toxic and feel nothing but freedom

I ghosted/ditched this one woman I became friends with through a hobby group in our village some 8-9 years ago.

She seemed OK at first, but after a few months, kept making remarks about how she couldn't understand how me and DH could afford to live in this village, in the cottage we live in, and buy a new car (2 years old,) and go abroad once a year, and put 2 kids through uni... when my DH was (in her eyes,) in a 'normal job' and not a 'degree educated professional,' and I worked part time - from home.

Almost weekly she commented. She and her DP had a £200K mortgage, which was the limit they could afford, and never had any money, and she was constantly quizzing why and how we could afford what we had...

I never told her, I always changed the subject, and I never explained myself, and after around the 20th time she mentioned it, I decided I didn't want anything to do with her any longer. It was horribly inappropriate, and it became an obsession with her to find out what mine and DH's income was, and how we managed to afford what we had.

So I blocked her on everything, and ghosted her. #sorrynotsorry

She mithered and badgered me for several months before she gave up. Good riddance!

@LukeEvansWife

Usually when they get pregnant- it's easier that way as I'm not great at feigning interest

Me too

One sided friendship for years all through my infertility battle would tell me about all the abortions she had, when I finally got pregnant there was yet another abortion when it came to my baby shower which meant a lot to me she went out the night before and tried to tell me her won was up throwing up at 4 am and couldn't attend when I didn't believe her and still don't she called me a bad mum before my son was even born that was the end for me she tried numerous ways to get in touch after but I just wasn't interested

She was a nurse, I helped her write a cv, prepare for her dream job interview. in total I spent about 1 whole month with this. She used to complain that she had no friends feeling sorry for her I invited her for every possible event and introduced her to hundreds of people.

I can see it was all one sided.

Anyway, one day I saw the guy she was dating flirting with one of her colleagues and I confronted him. I then sent her a text asking if they were still seeing each other. I told her I saw them flirting and he become nervous when he saw me. She replied insulting me that I was the one interested in him and I wanted to steal him away from her. Followed by a lot of insults.... I was very naive and tried calling her back and text because I thought she was joking. She was very serious about this issue. I had to let her go. I have a serious problem letting people go for my life.

She was really toxic and self centred. Constant self imposed dramas. She was also a serial cheat on her boyfriends. We were friends in school and I felt like she wasn't a great influence as I fell into a bad crowd through her (her friends). One day I just realised she didn't actually care about me at all and I got nothing from the friendship whatsoever. So it just gradually fizzled out and I have no regrets.

When my 'friend' flew into London to attend an event and I was okay for him to stay st mine turned round one night said he had no friends and whn I said well what about me his response was why does everyone always say that! And he wouldn't answer my question.

So disrespectful

One friend I had been starting to back away from due to her drinking. But then she went drink driving, with her baby son in the back seat and had an accident, injuring another driver (luckily not seriously).
I was done then.

Another friend…..shared some highly sensitive information with a group of her DD’s friends (we’d been witnesses to a serious incident…police were involved…nothing my DD did) These girls used this information to bully my DD so badly that she was isolated, physically assaulted and eventually had a breakdown.
I avoid her at all costs because if I saw her, I wouldn’t trust myself.

She told me who I could speak to like we were 12. End of the road for us. She actually genuinely thought she had the right!

Good friends for 30 years:
Ignored my partially sighted 84 year old mum when she turned up at a restaurant. We turned up 5 mins later and she casually said your mums upstairs. Acted like we were mere acquaintances rather than very good friends.
Told me I should join Facebook. I did. Ignored 3 friends requests.
Gave her SN 16 year old goddaughter (my daughter) a present which involved spelling.. She can’t read or write and it’s unlikely she ever will.
I miss her lots but maybe I loved her more than she loved me.

I've waved goodbye to a couple of friendships where the friend has turned out to be not the sort of friend I want

I'm currently holding back on another friend, who I don't think means to, but regularly rubs my face in it. I'm very stressed over my DS1 at the moment - we both have DS's of the same age - she knows I'm worried and nearly every text from her is telling me how great her DS is. She's proud, I get that, but it's really not helping me and it's happening on a very regular basis

I'm feeling a bit gutted about it, but I need to take a step back whilst I deal with stuff. I could manage if it was the occasional comment, but it's all she talks about currently and I feel like it's rubbing salt into my wounds.

2 people. One, famous for her many abortions, told her 9 year old son, when he asked why she hadn't aborted him, that she did try but by the time she realised she was still pregnant it was too late to try again. The other, a woman without children or experience of living with them was allowed to foster a difficult to manage 13 year old. She told me she was finding it hard going and she didn't know how to deal with him unless she gave up working to spend more time with him. So she'd be 'returning' him to the care system. I found both of these shocking and far too revealing of unexpected character that I cut ties with both of them. Awful.

Some of these are awful.

I have a friend who is lovely but I'm weary of because although she regularly messages to invite herself over mine, when I actually invite her for any kind of occasion or get together I'm trying to plan, she flakes. Every single time. Including special occasions. It feels like we can only be friends on her terms.

I lost another to militant veganism. The marching through Tesco with a tannoy and gory posters kind. I've been veggie since I was tiny, she was a recent convert and was absolutely horrid to anyone she couldn't convert too. I never judged her for eating meat.