People who claim to be empaths are narcissists

[Justreadingtheforum3]

I know a couple of people who claim to be empaths. They say things like "I was crying I feel their pain so deeply". This is normally in response to someone telling them their problem. Everything has to be about them and their feelings.

I'm pretty sure everyone is empathetic bar a few sociopaths, but other people don't have to make other peoples trauma about them?! In fact I think its insulting to the person experiencing the trauma to have person who believes they feel their problems deeper than them.

I'm assuming we all know at least one of these "empaths".

Are people claiming to empaths narcissist?

Yabu no they're not

Yanbu they are

Yeah, I know one self-proclaimed empath who can’t stop going on about it in Facebook…

I'm an empath but I don't go around announcing it to people or talk about my feelings when a friend is upset. In fact I really struggle to express when I'm upset to friends for my own issues for fear of how it will impact on them.

I had a difficult childhood, with a volatile parent. I think that is why I'm this way as I always had to be very good at reading their emotions to protect myself and my siblings .

Thinking about those people who go round saying "I'm an EMPATH" What's the difference between being an empath and being someone who has empathy that means it's something to be announced? Do they think having empathy is some superpower or something? Or that they have much more empathy than the rest of us?

I guess I could be described as an empath, as I do react strongly to other people’s pain and easily become weepy. It’s because I’m easily triggered as a result of childhood trauma.

I’ve never thought of myself in that way, though, and really don’t like being this way. I do my best to hide it when a friend is confiding in me about something, as obviously it isn’t about me! I can end up crying my eyes out afterwards, though.

I definitely can’t imagine making a thing about it on SM, though, that sounds very self-absorbed to me. Thankfully, it isn’t something my Facebook friends do.

@IveGotASongThatllGetOnYNerves

Thinking about those people who go round saying "I'm an EMPATH" What's the difference between being an empath and being someone who has empathy that means it's something to be announced? Do they think having empathy is some superpower or something? Or that they have much more empathy than the rest of us?

It's a matter of degree. Like somebody who likes to spend some time alone wouldn't call themselves 'a loner', but somebody who likes to spend all their time might. It's nothing to do with superpowers.

@ TheHouseIsOnFire
I didn’t claim empathy was just about reading emotions. I said that emotions are easy to read because it’s a matter of human evolution to be able to read anger, sadness, love and joy.

When someone has feelings we can read and comprehend what those feelings are. They can evoke out own emotional response. But you cannot feel someone else’s emotions.

And yes I can also tell how people are feeling but not from looking at their face expression. I can tell for example when dH is angry and he is in the garage (and I’m upstairs having a shower…..). I’m not sure WHAT is telling me what’s going on, but I can physically feel it. 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Um, is that not called telepathy?

@ColorMagicBarbie

And yes I can also tell how people are feeling but not from looking at their face expression. I can tell for example when dH is angry and he is in the garage (and I’m upstairs having a shower…..). I’m not sure WHAT is telling me what’s going on, but I can physically feel it. 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

Um, is that not called telepathy?

It's called delusions, and possibly psychosis.

It's called delusions, and possibly psychosis

No it isn't. Animals can sense when there's trouble and we all just kind of accept that, with an eye roll, and a 'Gosh, aren't dogs amazing, I don't know how they do it!'

We are animals too. Some of us are so far from our natural instincts that they think anybody who can still interpret them is nuts.

That's not at all the same thing.

@ManifestDestinee

That's not at all the same thing.

Clearly you know best!

Can you explain why it's not the same thing, or are you just stating your opinion as if it's a fact, and that's final?

I ask again: do empaths also feel when people are not unhappy? Do they "feel your pleasure" as well as "feel your pain"?

I have never heard anyone make that claim. I've quite often heard "I am glad for you", but not "I feel your joy."

I am asking because I don't think anyone on this thread, empath or otherwise,m has said that: it has all been about bad stuff, trauma, and so on. But I don't see why, if there is this Link with all around them, empaths should only pick up on unpleasant emotions and never apparently on pleasant ones.

”I’ve also read that when you subconsciously mirror other people that shows empathy, and I’ve realised that if someone else yawns I do too.”

Lol, literally everyone does this. All the special little snowflakes declaring themselves empaths in here

@AskingQuestionsAllTheTime

I am asking because I don't think anyone on this thread, empath or otherwise,m has said that: it has all been about bad stuff, trauma, and so on. But I don't see why, if there is this Link with all around them, empaths should only pick up on unpleasant emotions and never apparently on pleasant ones.

It works that way too. Beauty is so beautiful. Sadness is so sad. It's not selective.

@user1471442488

Particularly nasty comment. You wouldn't call somebody a snowflake for admitting to being stubborn, or any other character trait. Everybody is different. This is just a way of people being distinct from other people. Nobody has claimed to be special, and as far as i can see from the comments, nobody on the thread who says they're an empath would talk about it at all, were it not for the fact that this is a thread trying to make empaths out to be narcissists. Why do you feel the need to be so patronising?

@ClawedButler You have it spot on.

A combination of hypervigilance, your subconscious brain picking up on physical signs that you are not consciously aware of (micro changes in body language, smell, sound etc etc), confirmation bias and the really great trait that is a lot of empathy.

I just think you feel things more than some but I'm unconvinced it's different somehow to having lots of empathy tbh.

@ManifestDestinee, happy to see you can tell me I have some delusions when you’ve never met me nor have actually seen what I’m talking about…

But if that helps you feel better, please carry on thinking like this. Being challenged in your assumptions is always hard, I appreciate that.

I think everyone accepts that some people feel more empathy than others. It doesn't seem too great a stretch to draw a line and categorise all those on the far side of it as 'empaths'. We do that in all sorts of other ways.

What I find more interesting is how the term empathy has come to replace older ones like sympathy and compassion. I think that's a sign of the times because those other words have slightly different meanings.

Empathy has come to mean feeling another person's feelings. Compare that to sympathy which means expressing support and feeling pity for the sadness of others and most of all compassion which can mean something like sympathy or can be a response to someone's plight.

There are overlaps in all those words, but sympathy and compassion concern more what a person does.

Empathy is nothing more than what a person feels. It's morally neutral, doesn't imply support for another, and is centred entirely on the person who feels empathy. So, entirely suitable for narcissistic times like these.

I should have added that I have a friend who I would describe as an empath, on the (non-pejorative) understanding here. I would also describe her as sympathetic and compassionate.

She never makes things all about her. It's very important for her to help others even, I think, at too much emotional cost to herself.

I think she struggles with her strength of her feelings and can find it very hard to detach herself from them, meaning that although she is an excellent person she has made some unwise decisions about things.

MN is so weird, sometimes. There are zillions of threads for witches - that's cool, apparently.

I wonder, are they visited by posters telling them witches don't exist/aren't real (and/or are special snowflake narcissists)?!

Witches exist, there's a debate on whether magic works so I guess it's comparable.

I agree. A friends is always referring herself as an empath and she's definitely a narcissist. Always overcompensating saying what a nice person she is. Can be sweet but very self obsessed.

@CounsellorTroi

I’m definitely an empath!

You are the only person entitled to use this title

I personally think people really like the word narcissist and overuse it.