To think high heels look a bit silly?

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I'm a sucker for them (or used to be) but the more time goes by I'm starting to feel they have very little place in my wardrobe.

I feel overdressed and try to hard in them. I think it's hard to pull off the effortless look in heels. But I also feel like something is missing when I don't wear them on a night out for example.

I feel like it's yet another pointless trend for women to continue following - that are really uncomfortable and serve no real purpose.

I've also noticed younger women rarely wear them - have they seen the light?!

Or AIBU for feeling this way

Our manager late 50s who is same age as me and very skinny wears very high heels …she actually looks really common..no not jealous but think she looks very unprofessional …sorry!

I think they look great. I hope I never have to wear them again. My feet are fucked enough already. But I love the way they look.

I love high heels, I love the look and I love how they complete my fun outfits.

However, I'm 5ft 11 and absolutely tower over almost everybody I come across! As well as never even being bothered to wear an outfit to warrant them, I have been contemplating putting every last pair on eBay 😂

Flats all day for me, and by flats I mean slippers or trainers and that's about it 😂

I think some can carry most heels well and can make them look great. As others have said, it's all in what they want to wear most of the time. I don't tend to pay attention to shoes much, but the expectation of certain types of heels in certain environments can cause some foolish things.

When we were looking at secondary schools for my DD, it was really noticeable in one school that the male staff seemed to stride around while all the women I came across were walking very gingerly in very thin high heels. Those kind of very thin ones seemed impractical for a school environment and created a very odd and very visible difference between men and women.

I'm not sure if it was just fashion, though it seemed for all of them to be doing it, across ages, that there was some standard that they were trying to meet (nearly all of them were in pencil skirts too which wasn't helping & I don't think were high fashion at the time - it seemed some weird business suit type thing going on). It really put me off the place. I haven't really seen a place since with that very stark issue when it comes to heels, though as I said I don't tend to pay attention to that - this was just really obvious and awkward.

I barely wear them at the office now, only on nights out to add to an exceptional outfit.
I have a stunning pair of Cher shoes by Badgely Mischka in electric blue and they match my staple “wedding/event” dress perfectly.

But since the day I started wearing heels on nights out, I’ve never ever returned home still wearing them. They’re always in my hands and my soles are usually black from dancing barefoot.

I still wear heels, but not high ones, I have a mix of slightly heeled boots and boot shoes, I wouldn't wear a court shoe style as I agree they are not so fashionable, and really really high heels aren't either. Lots of young people though try to get a bit of height/fashion out of very clumpy shoes, heeled/clump trainers and so on, especially if wearing flares.

This thread does remind me though of the many attempts over the past 10 years to convince everyone that skinnies were totally passe and that no young people ever wear skinnies, and that to look good we should all ditch them. Now, it's true that baggier jeans are in, my girls wear them, but the style they wear them in which is crop top, show stomach, baggy jeans, trainers is just not one that at my age I could begin to emulate. They also occasionally wear skinnies or slim style jeans if they want to wear very baggy tops.

I was on campus this week and this show off your stomach/baggy jean look looked amazing on some of the students, but I don't think that means that if middle-aged women started wearing crop tops/baggy jeans/trainers they would look fashionable, we just look our age wearing that clothing.

In other words, there isn't a magic shoe that signifies youth, and you just look your age wearing flats or trainers, perhaps even more so as they can make a shorter person look a bit dumpy and if you have a matronly busom/not much of a waist, you look older. That's just my opinion of course.

The one place I've noticed that many students wear heels is for graduation. I've often seen them tottering across the stage, it's really noticeable. So there seem to be certain types of events that are still associated with heels, weddings probably the same.

Not all flats are healthier of course anyway, ballet flats provide no support for feet. Trainers can go sweaty/soggy although you can waterproof them. Flat sandals tear up my feet in summer. A bit of a heel isn't necessarily particularly bad for your foot. Wearing enclosed shoes made of plastic is also really horrid, and so many shoes are plastic now and not leather, they are really uncomfortable, and plastic heels are the worst.

I have just come back from an impossibly hip wedding in France and most of young wealthy fashionistas there (I am none of those things, by the way...) were in heels - not stilettos, but fairly high heels still. So not sure how out of fashion they are to be honest.

I can't wear high heels now, although I do like them. I tried a pair of high heels on in my bedroom the other day, I was doing a shoe tidy up,, but after a couple of years wearing sandal type things, I found that I couldn't stand up properly in the heels, and get the right body balance, and kept keeling over in the heels, like maybe twisting an ankle type thing.

I love heels. They make my legs look longer, me look slimmer and I always feel elegant in them. I'm not that bothered if young people think they're unfashionable because I see what young people think is fashionable and know that one day they'll look back and say, "what was I thinking?” We've all done that. 80s fashion anyone? So if you see a lone woman tottering down the road, give her a wave and I'll wave back.

I love the look of strappy heels with a night out dress or simple heels with a suit! In this way flats don't suit everyone and I think eg ballerina pumps definitely dont suit any of us that have bigger feet or more athletic legs and eg runners with dresses just make us look like we lost a pair of shoes! Saying that I don't think the vast majority of us could wear heels properly, I think we probably thought we looked better than we did as we limped along!

@FrankButchersDickieBow

I have never been able to wear heels. My sisters said I walked like Oda Mae Brown when I wore them 🤣

I see people walking in them with their legs stomping forward and their bodies leaninh back, like Rachel from Love Island.

It's not a good look. Some people can carry them off. Some can't, but one thing I can say is that they never look comfortable on anyone.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[quote RoseStar]“@5128gap

Certain types of white trainer, especially when worn with a midi dress, have become very much associated with middle age

You’ve got me worried now.. which!? Or pic please?![/quote]
Its the whole look really of midi dress and trainers. As someone said it started as edgy then everyone did it, and as happens when youthful trends become widely adopted and older women wear them, they're no longer youthful and edgy, and young people move on. Some trainers are particularly popular with older women, supergas, sketchers, generic ones from M&S. Nothing wrong with any of them, but that look is no more the height of youthful style than heels are.

@5128gap are Vejas at risk of going the same way, I see them everywhere on middle aged women… or what about deisgner ones like Gucci ace? Tbh I find midi dresses v unflattering too, they seem to emphasis their tummy for so many people including me, something which we used to sort of be able to offset with heels and longer (or shorter) lengths!

I hate wearing heels. Really hate it.
I hate having uncomfortable feet and I like to move about swiftly. You can’t do that in heels.

[quote RoseStar]@5128gap are Vejas at risk of going the same way, I see them everywhere on middle aged women… or what about deisgner ones like Gucci ace? Tbh I find midi dresses v unflattering too, they seem to emphasis their tummy for so many people including me, something which we used to sort of be able to offset with heels and longer (or shorter) lengths![/quote]
Yes vejas too. I'm not sure about the Gucci ones. As I said, I think it's more the whole look. I was out in a big city the other night and all the older women were wearing midi dress, white trainers and denim jackets. The young women were more likely to be in block heel strappy sandals in bright colours, with the very young students in clubby clothes with platform style trainers.

I used to love heels in the 90s

Never bought teetering uncomfortable ones, never stilettos. But a good heel? Yes. At 6ft (without heels) I’d tower over everybody. I used to like that, as a junior in a very male dominated industry. I’d wear quite dowdy suits (never felt right to try and look sexy in that world) but the heels helped give me confidence

I’d stride in them

Now I would not dream of wearing them. That kind of 90s office wear is gone gone gone

Hmm interesting @5128gap . I’m the wrong side of 40 to attempt the younger look but maybe I’ll still to more classic / elegant than trying to be trainer trendy!!

@UnsolicitedDickPic

I love high heels and I do feel like they pull an outfit together in a way I can't quite seem to achieve in a flat shoe. But, my God, I couldn't and wouldn't wear a heel again if you paid me.

Maybe the outfit would be more pulled together if you wore two shoes

I haven't worn heels in ages. I always used to wear them when younger but comfort comes first now.
DD very rarely wears heels now. Even on a night out all the girls wear trainers now unless it's somewhere really formal. Far more practical I suppose.

@Garriet

I can’t wear them but I used to covet them. They’re definitely out of fashion now though, with the younger generation. I went into a branch of Schuh yesterday and there wasn’t a single heel to be seen, not even a kitten.

I've noticed this too. They used to sell irregular choose heels and another brand. You're right they are heel free! Loads of lowly flats though.

The midi shirt waister dress with trainers gives me the shudders. My mum was a middle aged shirt waister wearer in the late 70s/early 80s so I always equate them with that era.
Heals, even low ones, give you ankles even when they are non existent. And on another purely health level wearing a small heal prevents plantar fasciitis. After wearing flats for many years my feet were agony. Twelve months wearing a 1 inch heal solved the problem.
The current younger generation have taken suffering in the name of fashion to a whole new level. Botox and fillers!

Flats are actually really bad too, for feet and posture. A slight raised heel (like formal men’s shoes) are much better, say osteopaths!

YANBU - horrible things, and totally unhealthy for the feet. Even pointy flats make me cringe when I think of those toes being squashed together! Barefoot/minimalist shoes only for me these days (not that I ever wore heels really).

A friend commented how a lot of the younger folk were wearing chipmunks heels for a night out in her town, so perhaps theirs a trend back to them. Not full stiletto, but a chunkier version of them.

Chunky heels, not chipmunks (!)