Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Parents insisting my DS mask?

137 replies

L0stinCyberspace · 20/09/2021 08:32

My parents can be very neurotic and are suddenly insisting DS (13) wears a mask when visiting them with us. He is doubly vaccinated and wears a mask in school (Ireland). I pointed out yesterday to my irate Father that he took train across the country recently, they use buses and taxis, my DH is in work, and my son is no likelier to carry Covid than they do.
They've been watching the jump in primary school children being sent home when one child tests positive, and are obsessing about this.
Yesterday I told my son not to mask and my Father was furious and left the room (which had an open window and we were all sitting at a long distance from each other) in a rage. AIBU?

OP posts:
MichelleScarn · 20/09/2021 08:35

You are absolutely not UR, that is crazy considering they are going out and about, is it a control thing, I am the head of the house, do what I say? Although it is their house I can see why they want their rules followed. Do they insist he does the same in your house?

PileOfBooks · 20/09/2021 08:37

I3d not like for him to be treated differently to everyone else in the room.

Mermaidpool · 20/09/2021 08:38

If its his house then his rules, yes I think it's daft though. I would be declining to visit until numbers are lower 'for df safety'

MajorCarolDanvers · 20/09/2021 08:39

Do your parents and you wear masks while visiting or is this only expected of DS!

RedHelenB · 20/09/2021 08:39

I would let him choose to mask and see his gps or not mask and run the risk that they won't want to see him. At 13 it's his decision.

Comedycook · 20/09/2021 08:39

That's really nasty to your ds

Overthebow · 20/09/2021 08:40

He is being ridiculous, but ultimately his house his rules. Don’t visit if you don’t want to do it!

PlanDeRaccordement · 20/09/2021 08:41

It’s not really your right to choose which risks are appropriate for your DF to take. He’s asked that risk be lowered in your visits by your DS wearing a mask indoors. I personally would have worn a mask in solidarity with my DS in your position.

SoupDragon · 20/09/2021 08:41

Yesterday I told my son not to mask

If it is in your father's house, that is not your decision to make. Either wear the mask or don't go.

Sirzy · 20/09/2021 08:43

Surely at 13 he is old enough to decide for himself whether to wear a mask and go or not wear a mask and stay away.

Original poster
L0stinCyberspace · 20/09/2021 08:43

@MajorCarolDanvers no, they are just singling out DS fora mask!

They invited him for lunch b4 school started up, but then made him eat his meal in a separate room. They could have eaten outside as I bought them a sturdy garden set, but Father "didn't want to". Angry

OP posts:
GreenWheat · 20/09/2021 08:43

I would just stop going there. Don't pander to their anxieties.

sirfredfredgeorge · 20/09/2021 08:46

If "fathers house, fathers rules" mean anything, then enforcement of those rules also fall in the father, there's no reason for anyone else to enforce them or anything, I can't imagine why any one would've visited with such rules, but if you have, you don't need to enforce them, it's down to the father to ask the kid to leave.

Comedycook · 20/09/2021 08:46

They're treating him like a leper... it's really awful.

If he took a lateral flow test would they then be prepared to see him unmasked

TastyToastie · 20/09/2021 08:46

Your dad's scared. Logic goes out of the window. It's counterproductive to push him and if he were to get covid he'd squarely blame your son.

I think mask wearing should be reciprocal. If you ask someone to wear one then you should wear one too. So either tell your son to wear one - but everyone else does too - or stay home until your dad is ready to mix without.

HerrenaHarridan · 20/09/2021 08:51

Does he have form get being controlling or singling our your ds?

If yes, back away and reduce contact until it feels healthy

If not then I’d have a little patience

MichelleScarn · 20/09/2021 08:54

@L0stinCyberspace does he refuse to get on public transport or go in a shop if people aren't wearing masks?

LukeEvansWife · 20/09/2021 08:55

Is ‘to mask’ a verb now? Confused

GiantHaystacks2021 · 20/09/2021 08:56

At least you're allowed in their house.
We weren't allowed inside their door for more than 15 months.

AwaAnBileYerHeid · 20/09/2021 08:57

Their house, their rules.

Blossomtoes · 20/09/2021 08:57

@LukeEvansWife

Is ‘to mask’ a verb now? Confused
Think so. It has been for some time.
BananaPB · 20/09/2021 08:58

That's outrageous. Either you all mask at meetings or you let your son stay at home until they get a grip.

Naunet · 20/09/2021 09:01

Ultimately it’s their house, so their rules, but I wouldn’t be visiting whilst your father was treating him like that.

Theunamedcat · 20/09/2021 09:04

No way would I want him going to see them if they are going to demonise him like that

Auntienumber8 · 20/09/2021 09:06

I assume the fear is based on the assumption that schools are hot beds of infection. Just before schools broke up my sons old school had close to a couple of hundred positive pupils out of a thousand students.

It is his house so you should abide by his rules however much you disagree with them.

Swipe left for the next trending thread