To be sick to death of being told I look young

[Ellavaday]

I’m 30, but get mistaken for much younger pretty much daily. I’ve recently started a new job and meeting different people which likely adds to it.
It’s always the same, “So, do you live at home with your parents?”
“So are you at college/uni?”
Then when I tell them my situation and age, “You look soo young! You look like you’re just out of school(etc).”

I didn’t mind it at first but it’s getting on my nerves now, it’s every single person I meet. Also the way they’re acting as if 30 is ancient. I’m sure people will say to enjoy it while it lasts and that I’m lucky, and I get that, but it’s just too much sometimes.

The next thing is that I constantly get referred to as cute and adorable. My partner works in a pub and has some female colleagues who are 20-22.
I’ve never spoken to any of them beyond a hi and ordering a drink, but They’ve apparently said to him ‘She’s soo cute/she’s adorable!”
If they’d said kind/friendly/nice etc ok, but it just feels like something you’d say to a puppy or a baby.

There was some concert coming up in which it was techno/drum and bass sort of music. My boyfriend mentioned it to this female colleague and then said he’d invited me too, and apparently she went ‘Oh wow, I can’t really imagine her liking that sort of music’ and laughed.

So because you’ve seen me for all of 10 seconds in a bar you know all of my music tastes? It’s not the first time I’ve heard that, just because I’m quiet and don’t drink etc people ‘can’t imagine me’ liking rap/hip hop/metal etc.
Just such a weird thing to say.

Rant over, does anyone else get this? I know there’s worse stuff in the world but it does irritate me now.

I kind of know where you’re coming from @Ellavaday - not so much people calling me cute or adorable but not getting drinks without an ID etc.

Some people don’t really look that closely. I think they assume I am a kid because I am short. It had nothing to do with attractiveness. They make a quick judgment based on my height. I have grey hair and wrinkles and don’t look young for my age. I am just short.

I've heard a lot of people complain about being told they look too thin, particularly on Mumsnet. People thinking they are anorexic etc. Maybe too rich was a poor comparison, maybe too posh? Like when people prattle on about "reverse snobbery".

I'm sure there's loads of 50 year olds who go clubbing in mini skirts and cropped tops and don't look wrong Rozillie, because everyone thinks they're in their 20s. They're the same people who looked 16 at 30.

@5128gap

I'm sure there's loads of 50 year olds who go clubbing in mini skirts and cropped tops and don't look wrong Rozillie, because everyone thinks they're in their 20s. They're the same people who looked 16 at 30.

What's your point?

@Miseryl

I've heard a lot of people complain about being told they look too thin, particularly on Mumsnet. People thinking they are anorexic etc. Maybe too rich was a poor comparison, maybe too posh? Like when people prattle on about "reverse snobbery".

Maybe, yeah. If someone is excluded and isolated from a social group because other people judge them as too posh, then that's a very real problem. I can imagine a lot of Mumsnet posters would write something mean spirited like 'oh boo hoo - go home and cry into your champagne' because all they see is 'this person has loads of money/a nice lifestyle' and not 'this person is socially isolated and terribly depressed'.

My point being that if people can look 16 at 30 why would you assume it would look 'wrong' for a 50 year old to be in a nightclub in young clothes? Why shouldn't a 50 year look incredibly young too? What happens to all the teenage looking 30 year olds, do they age decades overnight?

Yes
Well maybe over a week

@5128gap

My point being that if people can look 16 at 30 why would you assume it would look 'wrong' for a 50 year old to be in a nightclub in young clothes? Why shouldn't a 50 year look incredibly young too? What happens to all the teenage looking 30 year olds, do they age decades overnight?

I didn't say that, did I? I said that a typical looking 50-year-old who puts on 'young' clothes won't look young, they will look like an old person trying to look young, just like a young person who dresses 'older' will not look older. They'll look like a young person trying to look old.

The fact that some 50-year-olds might genuinely look young (whether or not they wear young looking clothes) is completely irrelevant.

I didn't think it was that challenging a point to comprehend.