‘Nice’ Things That Aren’t Actually

[WheelieBinPrincess]

Just a random musing.

Breakfast in bed- lovely idea, reality is you need to get up for a wee and then a tray is plonked on your lap, and groggy from sleep you are supposed to exclaim in delight over bits of pastry flaking into your sheets and slopping coffee down yourself and trying to subtly get the sluggy bits of fat off the bacon because you usually just get medallions.

Relaxing massage- I went the other day and I kept thinking ‘I’ll switch off and enjoy it in a minute’ but just kept thinking about whether to get the tube or the bus home and if there are oven chips in the freezer or not or if I watered my peace lily last week and if not it’s probably died. Then it was finished and it cost me £80.

Anyone got anything they can add to things that sound so nice as an idea but in reality are just not really?

Hot tubs (particularly ones in swimming pools/spas). I used to like them but I had the sudden realisation that it's just an outdoor bath with people I don't know using water that's been in there for far too long.

@BlameItOnTheBlackStar

Why does every single massage place play the same tinkly pan-pipey waterfall type noise?? I love having a massage the the soundtrack irritates the shit out of me (and gives me the giggles if I concentrate on it too hard)

I've never had a massage which is just as well because if they play waterfall music it would make me need a wee.

Recipes that have looong lists of ingredients and take hours to prepare and end up tasting rubbish

Having 'Happy Birthday' sung to you. There cannot be anyone out there who doesn't just cringe through it.

Hotels

They are always much more sterile than the fantasy. Sparse plug sockets, limited tv channels, everything bolted down, everything designed for no wear and tear.

Sterile

Definitely naps, baths and massages.

Hilarious thread!

What a fucking miserable thread.

Baths .. disappointing waste of time
Massages …I don’t actually like people I don’t know touching me
Holidays with young children …expensive and stressful
Holidays with teenagers…even more expensive ( a cruise was an unexpected success )
Afternoon tea in posh eaterie … meh
Expensive hotels …. I’m a pleb , I like Premier Inn , much better value
There’s probably more ….

Being an adult.

Fancy hospitality at sporting events
Eating outside (especially in August - wasps)
Flavoured gin
Takeaways
Sunday lunch anywhere other than my own home (and cooked by me)

Agree with baths, NYE and beach with kids too (although I enjoy the beach now that they’re all over 10).

I used to love a bath - book to read, chocolate, music from the transistor radio..... yes that was in the pre-central heating days - quiet bask in warmth!

I hate getting flowers. You have to prepare and find somewhere to put them and then watch them die and they make a mess in the process.

@LeafOfTruth

Anything involving a spa. Spa Days honestly sound like torture days, to me.

If someone gave me the option of a spa day or a day cleaning the fat out the sewers, I'd take the latter

A woman after my own heart! My friend bought me an expensive Spa day, I lay down on a lounger and went to sleep for the whole time. I don't want any hot rocks on my back thank you very much.

@littleloopylou

Gifts of almost any kind - the feeling of guilt! The expectations of reciprocation!

God yes. Absolutely.

What a fucking miserable thread

Wow, tell us what it’s like to love EVERYTHING in the world

yoga - i just don't see how it's relaxing, i'm too stressed trying to work out how to get into the positions, or get out of the positions, or not fall over and wipe out the person next to me, and don't even make me think about whether or not I should be breathing in or out at a given time!! And then that relaxation bit at the end......my mind is usually thinking "this floor is really hard and I must remember to take the chicken out of the freezer when i get home". urgh

Yes to PP who mentioned unannounced visitors, especially in the morning - so passive aggressive.

Also 'parties' at someone's house where a sales rep tries to sell me things I don't want - although Covid seems to have put an end to these for now, thank God.

Taking a black cab, not the treat I feel it’s supposed to be, listening to the cabbie being pro-Brexit and watching the meter rise like billio.

Parties
BBQs
Group activity

@Neonplant

What a fucking miserable thread.

Are people not allowed to discuss thing they dont like? Or should we all pretend to like everything, and keep our mouths shut if we dont?

Seafood
Hot weather
Wine
Anything using 'Boutique' as an adjective
Cats

Yeah ‘organised fun’

I like to have fun on my own terms thank you very much 😂

Massages are bad enough but now I’ve got to do fucking HOMEWORK for one? Jog on

😂😂 - nope, no homework required!

Extended family holidays.....too many people with too many different wants / needs / schedules etc.